How to Find Love When You Feel Unlovable


Here’s a list of reasons you can answer YES to the “Will I ever find love?” question. Plus, I share practical tips on how to find love in your life – especially when you feel unlovable or unwanted.

how to find love

In Love Will Find You: 9 Magnets to Bring You and Your Soulmate Together, Kathryn Alice encourages people who feel they will never find love again to stay hopeful and confident. She says – and I believe her – that nothing will keep love from you. You may feel too old, too fat, or too poor for love – but you are not! Yes, you will find love. Yes, you will be happy and healthy – and yes, you will be glad it took as long as it did to find the love of your life.

If your last relationship or breakup was painful, read Questions to Ask Yourself Before Starting a New Relationship. It’s important to be emotionally and spiritually healthy when you’re asking the ‘will I ever find love’ question. The healthier you are, the more quickly you’ll recognize if someone is the right guy for you. If you’re unhealthy, desperate, or needy, you’re more likely to fall into the trap of a bad relationship.

I Feel Unlovable – Will I Ever Find Love?

The reason I know you WILL find love again is because you’re asking this question. This is the first step to finding love again! Wondering if you will ever find love is part of opening your heart, mind, and soul to the possibilities of a new relationship. You may feel unlovable, but you are wrong.

You are more lovable and delicious than you know.

Here’s a list of reasons I believe you will find love again. This is what kept me inspired and encouraged when I wondered if I would ever fall in love. I didn’t get married until I was 35 years old – and I never gave up hope. If you want to know how to find love, you need to be confident and hopeful that you WILL find love again. No matter how disastrous or painful your past relationship was, you will find love again.

You will find love because your heart is open

Finding love again is much more likely when you are open and receptive to the possibilities. I know you are open to finding love because you are asking “will I ever find love?” This means you want to love and be loved, and you are willing to try different tips on how to find love. This is almost as important as being emotionally and spiritually healthy.

If your heart is open but you aren’t meeting anyone that you want to date, read How to Find a Boyfriend.

You will find love because you are lovable

After a breakup or divorce, we often feel unworthy. We question our own lovability factor, and we think we don’t deserve to love or be loved. That’s when the ‘will I ever find love?’ question comes up – because we doubt our inherent loveliness.

You need to know you are lovable before you can seriously embark on finding love again. Do you feel worthy of love? If not, you need to do some work on loving yourself.



Need encouragement? Get a beautiful FREE "She Blossoms" 2019 calendar when you sign up for my free weekly Blossom Tips!

One Blossom Tip a week. Short and sweet. You'll love it.

* indicates required



You will find love because you are already loved

The best tip on how to find love is to accept that you are already loved! Make a list of people who love you. Your loved ones may not say “I love you” every day, but you know they love you. For example, my mother-in-law has never told me she loves me. But I believe she does love me. When I allow myself to feel her love in the ways she expresses love, then I feel much more lovable and valuable than if I allow myself to believe I’m not loved.

When you find yourself struggling and searching and wondering how to find love again, remember the people who love you. Allow yourself to feel the love that already exists in your life. This will help you answer the “will I ever find love?” question with confidence.

Allow yourself to feel God’s love for you

One of the coolest things about God is how much He loves us! It doesn’t matter what we say or do; He loves us for who we are. He loves us deeply, wholly, and without reservation. Have you ever felt God’s deep, rich love for you? It’s the best feeling in the world! Much better than the worldly love we receive from the people around us. Don’t get me wrong – human love and physical intimacy is amazing. Human love is actually a taste of God’s rich Heavenly love. We crave love and connection from people, and from God.

how to find love

Will I Ever Find Love?

The beauty of allowing yourself to feel God’s love is that it will change your heart. When your heart is touched by God, you will act and look differently. You won’t fret and wonder about how to find love because you will be filled with spiritual love. This will make you beautiful and attractive to people around you.

When I wondered if I would ever find love, I sank into God’s love for me. I also got talked to a Christian counselor, because I had all sorts of issues that I knew were holding me back from love.

How to Find Love

Here is a list of quick tips for finding love again…

  • Stop asking “will I ever find love?” Instead, trust that you WILL find love again.
  • Get emotionally and spiritually healthy. Talk to a counselor if you have issues to work through (and we all have issues to work through!).
  • Stop waiting for love to find you. Instead, be open to seeing how love already exists in your life. Finding love again – especially after a breakup or divorce – is about appreciating the love you already have.
  • Read How to Find a Good Boyfriend.
  • Be patient. Remember C.S. Lewis’ words: “Jesus said, ‘Knock and it shall be opened.’ But does knocking mean hammering and kicking the door like a maniac?”
  • Open yourself up to new experiences and possibilities.
  • Say “yes.”
  • Accept that your last relationship is over. Let go of your past, and move forward with hope and confidence.
  • Remember that a heartbreak is a blessing from God.  It’s His way of letting you know He saved you from the wrong one.

If you’re asking if you’ll ever find love again because of a recent breakup, read 5 Signs You Are Ready for a Relationship. It’s important to heal and move forward before you start wondering if you will ever find love!

When you think about the question ‘Will I ever find love?’, what do you tell yourself? I encourage you to share your thoughts below. I can’t offer advice or counseling, but it may help you to express yourself in writing. Writing often brings clarity and insight.

May you find love again, and may you blossom into the woman God wants you to be. May you be authentic and real, and may you connect with He who loves you more than any man could.


Fix Your Marriage

Leave a comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *