Last week someone I love died.
Ralph was a kind-hearted, joyful, compassionate old soul – he and his wife Dorothy took me to church every Sunday when I lived in Africa. He was like my grandpa, yet he was also the principal of the school I taught at. He was encouraging, accepting and comforting, yet he ran meetings and assigned tasks. He balanced love and warmth with discipline and clear boundaries.
Now, Ralph is resting in peace. Even better, he’s enjoying every moment with his wife Dorothy, the angels in Heaven, and Jesus Himself! And I can’t wait to see them again one day.
Grief is exhausting, isn’t it? It takes a lot of energy to say goodbye. Even if a death is expected and perhaps a blessing, even if a good man or woman goes to Heaven…they aren’t here anymore. And that hurts.
As I wept over Ralph’s death, I found myself saying “no” a lot. I resisted and fought the truth, instead of accepting and allowing it. And the more I denied it, the worse the pain got.
You are not alone
Today I learned that one of the Hebrew meanings of “commitment” is to “roll towards.” This, my friend, is another form of acceptance. Rolling towards something means accepting a death or loss, weeping through the pain, and moving into a new perspective. Rolling toward the pain means you can also roll through it, into a new season of your life.
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Today I have a greater compassion for and understanding of sorrow and loss. I know grief, but it’s been years since someone I deeply loved died. Now I have a renewed understanding of the pain of loss and grief…and it will make me a better guide for you.
You are not alone. I know I’m not alone as I grieve and let go of my beloved old friend, Ralph. We’re in this together, you and I.
Let’s fly to Jesus, and hold on tight! He felt the depth of grief. He knew darkness like we’ll never know — and He chose to walk into it.
Jesus rolled toward and through the depths of darkness so you and I could be free. This is good news! Jesus took the hit so we could live with joy, peace, and light. We can allow grief and pain to grip us for a long time…or we can move through it until we get to the other side.
Keep moving, keep looking for the bits of sunshine and joy in the dark places. Open your heart and allow God’s light to flood the dark places. Reach for His peace, wrap yourself in His love, and choose to walk forward in joy.
With His love,
New on She Blossoms
An Easy Way to Start Mending Your Broken Heart – “One reason why some people handle the end of a relationship better than others is because of the way they interpret the event,” writes Paul McKenna in I Can Mend Your Broken Heart.
“Over the years I have had the opportunity to work with people who have undergone terrible tragedies but whose perspectives gave them an amazing strength that enabled them to handle the pain. Equally I have seen people devastated by a relatively small challenge. It’s down to the framing the individual uses.”
4 Secrets to Surviving an Empty House and Lonely Heart – Your life will never the be the same after you lose someone you love – and neither will you. These tips on how to survive an empty house and lonely heart after a loved one’s death will help you see you’re not alone, and give you hope for the rest of the day.
How to Find a Boyfriend Who Will Treat You Good – Yes, good men are hard to find! But if you know what you’re looking for and how to find a good boyfriend, you’ve won half the battle. Here’s how to set yourself up to meet a man who is right for you – a man who will become a loving, caring husband.
P.S. Your thoughts – big and little – on my Blossom Tips or anything in this blog post are welcome below! Feel free to share how you are, what you’re struggling with, or what you want God to do in your life. I don’t give advice, but I read every comment.
You are welcome here…say a prayer, say hello, or just say your name!
Laurie's "She Blossoms" Books
Growing Forward When You Can't Go Back offers hope, encouragement, and strength for women walking through loss. My Blossom Tips are fresh and practical - they stem from my own experiences with a schizophrenic mother, foster homes, a devastating family estrangement, and infertility.
How to Let Go of Someone You Love: Powerful Secrets (and Practical Tips!) for Healing Your Heart is filled with comforting and healthy breakup advice. The Blossom Tips will help you loosen unhealthy attachments to the past, seal your heart with peace, and move forward with joy.
When You Miss Him Like Crazy: 25 Lessons to Move You From Broken to Blossoming After a Breakup will help you refocus your life, re-create yourself, and start living fully again! Your spirit will rise and you'll blossom into who you were created to be.