When I say “fear”, what do you think of? Even more importantly, how do you “feel the fear and do it anyway”? Below, Blossy has a ducky answer that will quack you up – but first, let’s talk fear…
I have much to fear these days:
- My first book manuscript (Growing Forward When You Can’t Go Back) is due to the publisher next Monday
- Yesterday the publishing house assigned me a new editor because the one I was previously working with (and liked!) won’t be editing my book after all
- Next Tuesday I fly to New York City for a two-week solo vacation, to celebrate my birthday and the submission of my first manuscript to a big publishing house
To tell you the truth, I’m not really scared of those things. I’m curious and excited — and I hope my first experience with WhatsApp works because that’s how I’ll meet the apartment manager and get the keys to my place on my first night in NYC. Be kind, people of New York City, for I am a sweet and polite Canadian 🙂
However, I’m not scared because I learned the best way to overcome fear.
When I Feel the Fear
My scariest moments are when I’m home alone at night. When I was 18 years old, I survived a home invasion in the middle of the night (which I write about in How I Survived an Attempted Rape in My Bedroom).
Even now — 30 years after that guy broke into my apartment at 3 a.m. — I sometimes get scared at night. Especially if I hear unfamiliar noises. That’s when I play the “What Then?” game. Jesus asks me questions and I answer.
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It goes something like this:
“A guy breaks in,” Jesus says. “What then?”
“I fight him. I react instinctively, like before. I don’t know.”
“I survive. I know You’re here. We’ll get through it, like we always do.”
“I call 911. Maybe he’ll be arrested. I don’t know.”
“I’ll get help. Maybe counseling. I don’t know. You’ll tell me what to do when the time comes.”
“Will you stop with the questions, already?! Good Lord, you worry a lot. Our Father is hovering and will protect us. Let’s go to sleep…” (sound of snoring in peace)
When You Feel Scared
Write down The Thing that scares or worries you. Then hear Jesus ask, “What then?” Write whatever comes into your head. Again, Jesus asks “what then?” Keep answering Him — even if you say “I don’t know” repeatedly. (Because that’s the point: we don’t know! But He does).
You’ll see two things:
- There’s no use worrying about the past, present, or future. Fretting wastes your time and energy. Walk through your worries once with Jesus, if you must. Then leave them with Him.
- You can and will survive! God sifts everything through His hand before it reaches you. And, you can draw on His infinite strength, power, and guidance. Not only will you survive, you might find unexpected blessings and blossoms in the aftermath.
God knows what’s coming. He has prepared the way. Trust Him to lead you through.
Overcoming Fear on She Blossoms
This week’s theme on “She Blossoms” is coping with different types of fear. We’ve having an excellent and comforting discussion about fear (and many other things!) in our She Blossoms Facebook Group. Feel free to join us.
Here are a few articles to help you overcome fear:
What to Do When You Feel Scared You’ll Never Be Loved – It’s normal to veer between fear you’ll never fall in love and hope for the future. I didn’t get married until I was 35 years old, and was definitely scared I’d never be loved by a man! I didn’t know how to receive or give love, but I knew I wanted to get married. I knew I wanted a family…I just didn’t know how to get one.
How to Cope When You’re Scared to Grieve – My grandma’s death was my biggest, most shocking experience with grief. My heart was broken, my whole body in shock, and my mind reeling. I couldn’t believe she was gone, and I was filled with fear. I didn’t realize how normal it is to be scared of the grieving process. C.S. Lewis said, “No one ever told me that grief felt so like fear.”
7 Tips for Overcoming Fear of What People Think About You is one of my all-time favorite articles. The best way to overcome your (completely normal) fear of what people think is to do things that make people think about you. Yes, it’s counterintuitive. And yes – it works! Here’s how I’m successfully overcoming fear of what other people think of me, and how you can find the same freedom, peace, and joy in your life.
Water Off a Duck’s Back
May your Easter weekend be filled with truth, grace, and love. May you experience the joy of new life, the blessings of new growth, and the peace of Jesus’ presence. Maybe you truly know what “He is risen” means in your life.
With His Love,
Laurie & Blossy
Laurie's "She Blossoms" Books
Growing Forward When You Can't Go Back offers hope, encouragement, and strength for women walking through loss. My Blossom Tips are fresh and practical - they stem from my own experiences with a schizophrenic mother, foster homes, a devastating family estrangement, and infertility.
How to Let Go of Someone You Love: Powerful Secrets (and Practical Tips!) for Healing Your Heart is filled with comforting and healthy breakup advice. The Blossom Tips will help you loosen unhealthy attachments to the past, seal your heart with peace, and move forward with joy.
When You Miss Him Like Crazy: 25 Lessons to Move You From Broken to Blossoming After a Breakup will help you refocus your life, re-create yourself, and start living fully again! Your spirit will rise and you'll blossom into who you were created to be.
P.S. I’ll email you next week, from New York City! What can I bring you from the Big Apple? You name it, and I’ll take a photo of it for you 🙂