When You Feel Scared — Blossom Tip 23


What is the biggest fear you face today? I was thinking about Blossoming despite fear yesterday, while jogging through my dark neighborhood at 5:30 am.

Though dawn was nowhere in sight, I chose to cut through Myrtle Park. A dark park, with a few path lights here and there…and me, wearing a white jacket, light beige running pants, and a white toque.

Thump thump thump is the noise I hear, towards the forest on the other side of a clearing. Then I see a black wolf-like animal running across the clearing, heading for the trees. A black coyote? No, couldn’t be. A bear? Seems too fast. I stand for a moment, then decide all is probably well.

So I keep jogging along the dark path, alert but not afraid. Okay, maybe a little scared. It’s really dark, and bad things happen in dark parks.

Thump thump thump again.

“Good thing you’re wearing a white jacket,” he says. Who? I have no idea, because he’s wearing all black. A man in the dark park, talking to me from somewhere in the blackness.

And then a pitch-black wolf-like animal runs up to me, panting, a thick heavy stick in his mouth. Drops it at my feet. Wants me to throw it, so he can fetch.

“Oh,” I laugh, “it’s just a man and his dog.”

 

The Surprising Part of the Dark Park

Sometimes we run blindly (foolishly) into situations — like dark parks — wearing white clothes so we can be easily seen. I wear white when I jog in the dark, so people can see and avoid running into me. To me, my white clothing represents safety, peace, and freedom on the dark predawn streets.

My white running gear also represents the joy, love, and light of Jesus — and it puts me at risk. In the dark park, I risked being seen by people and animals I know naught of. I risk being noticed by dark forces that may not appreciate me treading on dark ground, through dark paths, around dark forests.

When you’re clothed in the light, joy and freedom of Jesus, you’re a target in a dark world. If you let your light shine, you will be seen by all manner of people…and you will be attacked by all manner of things, in all manner of ways.

Put on the White When When You’re Scared

Put on your white clothes — especially when you’re scared to walk through a dark park. Maybe you need a silver suit of armor to protect you against deadly diseases, chilling circumstances, toxic relationships. Maybe you need a pretty ivory dress to dance through a sticky situation, or a bleached-white snow suit to trek through a long, cold season.

When You Feel Scared She Blossoms Tip 23

Blossy

Or maybe you need white running clothes, to run away from trials and temptations and dark parks you shouldn’t be walking through.

Wearing white may not protect you from dark forces that threaten — or it may protect you in ways you’ll never know until you meet Jesus face-to-face. Wearing white won’t guarantee you’ll get through the dark park unscathed, but it will fill you with peace and joy that surpasses all understanding.

Choose to put on your silver suite of armor, pretty ivory dress, or bleached-white snow suit. Before you zip and button up, invite the light of the Holy Spirit in. Give Him your fear, and decide whether you need to stomp, dance, or trek through the dark parks of your life.

 

On Blossom This Week: Decision Making

On When the Grief Never Ends and You Can’t Reach Out to God, I challenge readers to accept that grief changes over time, but never really “ends.” Decide to explore new ways to reach out to God.

I wrote 3 Steps to Deciding What to Do About a Troubled Relationship for a reader who can’t accept her husband’s decision to separate. She knows she can’t stay in her marriage, but she believes she can’t let him go.

And on How to Stop Feeling Like a Failed Writer, I share tips to help aspiring authors move past the rejection letters and into fresh hope! It’s a decision that all writers need to make, if they want to become professional writers.

Finally, 8 Ways to Survive IVF Without Feeling Sorry for Yourself was part of last week’s theme of overcoming self-pity. Infertility is a painful process — it’s easy to fall into a black pit of despair.

With the white-hot love of Jesus,

Laurie & Blossy

xo



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3 thoughts on “When You Feel Scared — Blossom Tip 23

  • Kat kat

    Im not sure how i had came across ur path on the internet but so far what i have read, im thankful. The believe the good lord is my saviour but why i dont put all that weighs me down in his hands, idk. Maybe i feel i deserve what im going thru but the flip side to that, i dont understand what ive done so wrong that im going thru such a hard time in my life. For the past three yrs now ive felt like nothing but a failure as if i really serve no purpose. Starting at 13 or so, my son wanted to go live with his dad, something i avoided 4 2 yrs till it came to a point at the age of 15, my ex took me to court. Sure, i could of fought it and our son could be with living with me still but i felt it wasnt for me to keep him from his dad..he needed his dad and missed him greatly. My part as a parent, playing both parts wasnt working any longer. It came to a point in my life i knew i had to learn to let go without letting go. Second hardest thing in my life ive ever had to do. As long as my son is happy, im happy. The day he left home to go live in his new home, is the day i felt useless, no longer had a purpose or anything to work for. It seemed as if being a mother just came to an end, as if i wasnt needed any longer. Theres been so many decisions that i could had choose differently, but that goes for everyone…thats regrets for ya i guess. Which i can say, i only have 1 of 47 yrs..Not going home to make admends with my day before he passed away. Instead, a yr goes by and suddenly im having to say my goodbyes over the phone before he was taken off of life support. I gave up trying to get to know that man at the age of 32, wish i hadnt. By doing so, it made me just like him when i always told myself i would never be. Figured once i moved 3 states away, he would realize how much he did loved me, possibly missed me and just maybe call and tell me. But he never did. Once him and mom was vacationing and was only 4 and ahalf hrs from me but never bothered to call to even see if i would want to drive to come see them. I moved to the South in 2001, when 911 hit. My dad passed away at the age of 56 from ALS in 2006. For 5 yrs, i waited for a phone call from my dad but never received one. When he first got diagnosed of ALS, i went home and spent the summer but was only treated as if i wasnt there at all. When i left after 2 months, the vivid image of my dad never goes away. Right before i pulled away from the home i called home, im sitting in my truck fixing to put it in drive and doing so, i looked over. There stood my dad inside of the house on the other side of the screen door, looking at me with tears in his eyes and i could tell he wanted to say something but instead of me putting my truck in park, getting out to see what he wanted to say…i put the truck in drive and drove away. A part came over me saying, this serves him right, he never took the time out for me, now that he wants it, im not taking the time out for him. I wish i could turn that 1 moment back in time so i can do things differently. That was so selfish of me, if only i had known a yr from then that would be my last goodbye. I know i have my faults but when will i allow myself to learn from them muchless put them in gods hands. I keep even making the same mistake with a man that i think will become the same man i first met. It only keeps getting worse instead. He not only lied to me right from the get go, almost 8 yrs ago but had told me lie after lie since then, has put his hands on me in angre, disrespects me, is inconsiderate to my feelings and needs, uses me every chance he gets by only telling me what i wanna hear (i fall for it every time) Im in love with a man that mistreats me and some how he seems to gloat over it regardless of the many times ive looked stupid standing beside his side doing so. The countless promises broken, the many times he has asked my hand in marriage just for show, never being able to distinguish when he was playing games with me when knowing how serious it meant to me. Hows does or why would the good lord himself want to be in love with a man that obviously doesnt love me back like he should. Being mentally abuse with lies, cheating, mind games is far worse than physical abuse. Physical abuse is only bruises, mental abuse never goes away…words cut far to deep..wounds that do not heal..I have many of them. Why i keep holding on to the very far and in between “good times”, ill never know. Maybe its meant i be and stay a lonely person in my own prison. Worse than lonely ?, is being in love with someone that makes you feel that way as if u were all alone to being with. I guess sex isnt everything, which is the only thing we are great at and the only time him and i get along with one another. Would be nice to be apart of a family again, i miss it but would be even nicer to be a part of anything where i would be welcomed. Ya know, its sad when u can count how many friends you have on 1 hand…i counted zero. Theres been countless times ive thought asking the god lord to just take whats on me, over me into his own hands and let me see what its like to smile again, be happy again, to be wanted again, to be loved again. I just dont wanna be sad and lonely anymore. I dont wanna feel empty inside any longer…first thing is first though…i need to ask and i dont know how. Thanks for listening, i really needed an ear tonight.

    • Laurie Post author

      Thank you for sharing your story, Kat! I’m glad you’re here.

      You’ve been through so much, and you’re getting ready to move forward in your life. I can’t imagine how you must feel, but it sounds like you’re getting stronger and healthier, bit by bit. It takes time to heal from trauma and such difficult pain…and unfortunately there aren’t usually miraculous overnight recoveries. Even Christians with strong relationships with God don’t just bounce back from heartbreak and grief, or from losing love! It takes time for our tender hearts to heal.

      Sign up for my newsletter — I send weekly encouragement that will help you Blossom.
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      And take good care of yourself, for you are worth taking good care of.

      With the love of Jesus,
      Laurie