If you want him to like you for who you are, you can’t pretend to be something you’re not. These tips on how to make a boy like you aren’t about playing games or flirting. Rather, they’re about being honest and real so you don’t have to spend your time lying or trying to manipulate him.
If you’re dealing with mean girls, read Girl World: How to Ditch the Drama and Find Your Inner Amazing. Patricia Ottaviano gives practical advice for how to fearlessly stand your ground with your friends and enemies, hold your own, and dictate your happiness. This book isn’t focused on how to make a boy like you. Rather, Girl World will help you transform your insecurities into strengths and kick your inner critic to the curb.
Here’s my first tip on how to make a boy like you for who you are: allow yourself to make mistakes. In 6 Ways to Enchant a Man, I share research shows that people who make mistakes are more likeable than those who seem perfect. People who make mistakes are seen as more approachable and less judgmental than “perfect” people.
So, to make a boy like you for who you are, don’t be afraid to share your imperfect personality traits or your mistakes! Being authentic and real increases your “attractiveness quotient” and shows him that you’re normal…just like he is.
How to Make a Boy Like You
These tips aren’t about fashion, flirting, or texting your way into his heart. They’re about being yourself, speaking your truth, and not being afraid to show up without pretending to be something you’re not.
Learn how to like yourself
If you’re one of the 22,000 people who search for the term “I hate myself” on the internet every month, then you’re not ready to learn how to make a boy like you. Rather, you need to start learning who you are and how to like yourself.
Everyone likes people who like themselves, who treat themselves with respect, and who don’t trash talk themselves. If you have a healthy, positive view of yourself then others will like you more. Liking yourself doesn’t mean you’re a mean girl. It means you’re at peace with your personality, strengths, weaknesses, mistakes, and future. You’re happy with yourself.
If you’re a woman, you might like Make Every Man Want You: How to Be So Irresistible You’ll Barely Keep from Dating Yourself! Marie Forleo describes how to how you can make yourself more appealing to others in almost every situation. Forleo offers life-changing lessons for loving yourself inside and out. Once you embrace your unique qualities and dissolve your bad relationship habits, you’ll be amazed to find how irresistible you are to others.
Need marriage help? Get FREE relationship advice from Marriage Coach Mort Fertel.
Decide if you like this boy
What do you like about him? If you were 100% completely honest with yourself, is there anything about him that makes you feel uncomfortable or unhappy? Think about how he acts with his friends, adults, teachers, and you. Is he honest, kind, attentive, and nice? If he’s a “bad boy”, are you prepared for the typical bad boy behavior?
Listen to your gut. Don’t pursue a boy when your instincts tell you that he’ll hurt you. Don’t waste your time learning how to make a boy like you when something is telling you to stay away from him.
If you haven’t met a boy you like yet, read How to Find a Boyfriend.
Create happiness in your life
Are you a happy person? Not many boys want to hang out with unhappy girls. Being with a depressed, sad person is depressing and sad. I don’t think you should pretend to be happy or fake a good mood all the time. Rather, take a look at your underlying level of happiness about your life.
On a scale of 1 to 10 with 10 being the most happy, joyful, optimistic person on earth…what number are you? Number one is the most depressed, sad, negative person on earth.
Deal with the things in your life that make you unhappy. Don’t do this so you can make a boy like you; do it so you can be a happier, healthier, most optimistic person! Becoming a happy person doesn’t guarantee you’ll make anyone like you, but you will enjoy your life a whole lot more.
Who are you? You can’t learn how to make a boy like you for who you are if you don’t know what you like, dislike, believe, value, hope for.
Figure out who you are by paying attention to how you feel when you do stuff. Do you feel happy or bored when you watch football on tv, bake cookies, update Facebook, play video games, go shopping, sit in English class, hang out with your friends, or put makeup on?
The best tip on how to make a boy like you is to figure out who you are. For example, are you introverted or extroverted? To find out, take my Test for Introverted Personality Traits.
Find your passion
It is not your purpose in life to learn how to make a boy like you for who you are.
It’s important to be in a good relationship, to love and be loved. But it’s more important to have a balanced life that doesn’t revolve around a boy. You’ll be a naturally happy and optimistic girl if you have something in your life to be passionate about. Maybe you dream of being a writer or cop or astronaut. Maybe you love animals and want to be a veterinarian.
Don’t let your yearning to make a boy like you overcome the other things that are important to you. Create a life that is full of a variety of fun activities, positive people, interesting plans, and exciting goals for the future.
Remember that you can’t make anyone like you
Nobody is liked or loved by everyone. Movie stars, celebrities, popular kids at school, even popular tv shows and movies aren’t unanimously loved by everyone! This means that you may not “succeed” at making a boy like you.
You need to remember that your value and worth as a person does not change, whether or not this boy likes you. You are smart, creative, beautiful, valuable, and unique. If he doesn’t like you, it’s not because you’re not good enough. It’s because you and he simply weren’t meant to be together. It hurts. I hate being rejected, and I’m disappointed and sad when I find out that a guy doesn’t like me as more than a friend.
Don’t lose your spark even if this boy doesn’t like you! There is a better boy, a different boy, a more suitable boy right around the corner. And he will like you for who you are – and you won’t have to do anything to “make” this boy like you. All you have to do is be yourself.
If you’re ready to tell a boy how you feel, read How to Write a Love Letter.
I welcome your comments on how to make a boy like you for who you are, but I can’t give advice. Even so, I hope you share your experience!
“Speak your truth, even if your voice shakes.” – Maggie Kuhn.