Do you feel unloved, hopeless, or trapped in your relationship? Here’s how the power of love can save your marriage. Love isn’t all you need! You also need hope, faith, courage, and strength.
Whether your marriage needs a complete makeover, a touch up, or just a new purpose, A Lifelong Love: How to Have Lasting Intimacy, Friendship, and Purpose in Your Marriage will set your relationship on an entirely new dimension. Gary Thomas will help you see your spouse differently, and guide you through the power shifts and seasonal mine fields that blow up so many marriages. You’ll learn how the power of love can not only save your marriage but grow your relationship in deep, lasting ways.
7 Signs Your Marriage is Over has been one of my most popular articles since the day I wrote it. The good news is that none of those signs means a thing if you believe in the power of love to save your marriage! Love CAN overcome those relationship problems that might lead to separation or divorce. The bad news is that even though the power of love is strong enough to save your marriage, you might not be willing or able to take the leaps of faith required to move forward.
How the Power of Love Can Save Your Marriage
Every relationship is different. Thus, there are no “one size fits all” tips for saving your marriage simply by learning about the power of love. These ideas may or may not work for you, but you have nothing to lose by giving them a think…
Define what “love” means to you
When I think of love, I think of God. His powerful love, compassion, peace, joy, and grace is available all the time – no matter what mistakes or bad choices you made. God’s love is always there for you, a river of love and life that you can dip into anytime you want. Yet, God is mysterious and unknowable! I believe the power of love can save your marriage IF it’s Godly love. Human love is weak and unstable. God’s love is ever-present and powerful enough to save even the most difficult of marriages.
What does love mean to you? Do you believe the power of love can save your marriage? Take time to explore your immediate thoughts and reactions to those questions. Knowing what you think about what love means to you and if you believe love is powerful enough to save your marriage will give you insight and self-awareness. And that’s the first step to tapping into the power of love and saving your marriage.
Learn the power of love languages
If you’re not thrilled by the idea of the power of God’s love, read Examples of Gary Chapman’s 5 Love Languages. There, you’ll find more solid and specific definitions of how love affects your relationship. Love isn’t just a feeling, and it’s not just sexual intimacy. Love might be making lasagne for your husband, or gracefully stepping back so he can pursue his hobbies.
The Five Love Languages can help you see how the power of love can save your marriage – but only if your relationship isn’t abusive or if your husband isn’t dealing with mental or emotional health issues. Chapman’s Love Languages are most effective in saving mostly healthy marriages…they aren’t deep or rich enough to solve serious relationship or personal problems.
Powerful love changes how you see your marriage
Love isn’t about your feelings. Love is action. You can say “I love you” to your husband all day long, and he can say it back. But if your words aren’t accompanied by actions (eg, taking time away from your responsibilities to simply be together, or being honest with your husband about your fears and concerns), then your love is flat.
When you learn about the depth and width of God’s love for you, you will start learning how the power of love can save your marriage. The love of Jesus is a model that we can apply to our relationships and our lives.
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My personal example of the power of God’s love
Here’s the question that changed my life and my relationship with my husband: “How does God see you? Take 10 minutes, and write down His perspective of you.”
I believe God sees me as a bouncy little girl with unruly dark curls, hair ribbons, and a pretty dress. In His eyes, I am sweet, innocent, vulnerable, joyful, curious, and o so excited about the possibilities of life! This image – and the accompanying powerful feeling of love I experience when I consider how God sees me – changes who I am. I’m less likely to be impatient, angry, or condescending to my husband. I judge less, accept more. I surrender to God’s will for our marriage and our life together.
How do you think God sees you? Take 10 minutes, and write down His perspective of you.
Practical ways to tap into the power of love
Thinking about God’s powerful love and saving your marriage may be vague and even confusing. So, I brainstormed a few tips on how love can save your marriage in more practical ways. Power comes in all sizes and shapes – and can even be administered in bite-sized tips!
Practical tips on how the power of love can save your marriage
- Love has the power to change your perspective and actions in specific ways
- The power of love can help you be more considerate and thoughtful in your actions, which can save your marriage
- Love helps you see your selfishness and ego
- The power of love can help you let go of your self-centredness and pride, which can save your marriage
- Love helps you see your spouse differently
- The power of love can help you treat your husband gently, with respect and kindness
For more marriage-saving tips on love and relationships, read How to Save Your Marriage Without Counseling.
Consider how the power of love can save you
I have to go back to God’s love, because it is the ONLY love that is powerful enough to save your marriage! God’s love changes you by showing you how valuable, cherished, precious, unique, and loved you are. Through Jesus, you see how deeply and dearly you are loved. If only you could taste one drop of God’s ocean of love for you! For you, He created the world. For you, He sacrificed His Son.
Human love isn’t powerful enough to save your marriage, because human love is weak and insecure. Only God can offer the power of love to save your marriage, because God’s love is perfect, consistent, and reliable.
“To be fully seen by somebody, then, and be loved anyhow — this is a human offering that can border on miraculous.” – Elizabeth Gilbert.
I welcome your thoughts on how the power of love can save your marriage. I can’t offer relationship advice or counseling, but you may find clarity and insight if you write about your experience.
May you experience the power of God’s love, and may it save your marriage. May you see yourself the way He sees you, and may you recognize the depth and width of Jesus’ sacrifice for you. May your heart be broken for Him, healed by Him, and renewed by the power of His love. May you walk humbly with your God in peace, love, and joy!