6 Ways to Develop Intuition in Your Relationships

Using your intuition helps you make quicker, more inspired decisions. Developing intuition in your relationship will help you connect with your partner and see your relationship more clearly. Intuition is particularly important when you’re dealing with relationship problems, because intuition helps you sort through the clutter and noise, so you can get to the root of the problem.

develop intuition in relationshipsThe Intuitive Way: The Definitive Guide to Increasing Your Awareness by Penney Peirce is a helpful resource for developing intuition in relationships and daily life. I’m not into the “new age” type of intuitive healing or going into your third eye center to find the answers, but I believe that this book can help you develop intuition if you don’t believe in connecting with God.

If you do believe in God as your Source of guidance, power, love and peace, I recommend Beautiful Things Happen When a Woman Trusts God by Sheila Walsh. I didn’t list this book first because this is an article on how to develop intuition in your relationship. But I 100% believe that learning how to trust God goes hand in hand with developing your intuition – and you need to decide what is more important to focus on.

And here’s one of my favorite quotes about trusting your intuition:

“At times you have to leave the city of your comfort and go into the wilderness of your intuition. What you’ll discover will be wonderful. What you’ll discover is yourself.” – Alan Alda.

Developing Intuition in Your Relationship

“Do not bring people in your life who weigh you down. And trust your instincts … good relationships feel good. They feel right. They don’t hurt. They’re not painful. That’s not just with somebody you want to marry, but it’s with the friends that you choose. It’s with the people you surround yourselves with.” – Michelle Obama.

1. Get out of your head

Developing intuition in your relationship isn’t about analyzing, thinking, or deconstructing what he said, didn’t say, did, or didn’t do. Rather, developing intuition is about feeling out the situation and trusting that you can find and follow the truth about your relationship.

For me, this means accepting my husband for who he is and knowing that he loves me and would do anything he could to make me happy. Sometimes I get bored, impatient, and frustrated in my marriage. That’s just part of being in a relationship – it’s just life with another human being! My intuition tells me that he is a good man, and I’d be a fool to entertain thoughts of anything other than building a strong relationship with him.

2. Learn the difference between developing intuition and overthinking

I overthink all the time – I spend WAY too much time in my head! I analyze my behavior, my husband’s words, my reaction, over and over and on and on endlessly. Developing intuition in your relationship is about listening to what your heart is telling you.

“Ask yourself, “what feels right?’ says Melody Beattie in More Language of Letting Go. “The answer will arise from a peaceful, nonemotional place, not a place of urgency or fear.” The right decision in your relationship is the one that feels lighter and righter (as opposed to heavy, dark, bland, and lifeless).

3. Take a time out

“You must take times of stillness to realign with your higher self and your inner guidance,” writes Penney Peirce on her Intuition & Energy Blog. “Practice deep breathing each day to fill you to the root chakra, holding the breath for a moment and then expel the breath knowing that all stale energy is being released. Moving your body many times a day in stretching activities or walking also helps to move the energies through your meridians without becoming stagnant and creating blockages.”

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Giving yourself time will help you overcome insecurity in your relationships.

4. Connect with God

For me, it’s prayer that realigns me with my “higher self” and helps me develop intuition. I don’t necessarily pray over every decision I make. I find that if I make connection with God a moment-by-moment act (as much as possible, depending on what I’m doing!), I’m more likely to know what the right decision is. That’s the first step in developing intuition: connect with a Higher Source of power, strength, and energy. Penney calls it your own higher self and inner guidance, but I could never rely on myself alone! I trust my Heavenly Father to guide and stabilize me.

“Prayer is you talking to God. Intuition is God talking to you.” – Wayne Dyer.

5. Listen to the small voice

What do you know that you don’t want to know?

Developing Intuition in Your Relationship

Developing Intuition in Your Relationship

There are things you know in your heart and soul, things you don’t want to admit or accept or believe.

Here’s what a reader said on one of my most popular articles: “I want to believe he still loves me but it is really hard,” says J on Is Your Husband Cheating? 5 Signs He’s Having an Affair. Her intuition is telling her that his emotions are entangled with another woman. She found indisputable evidence that he’s having an emotional affair, but he says it’s “nothing”, just banter.

6. Gather courage to follow your intuition

This is the most difficult and important tip for developing intuition in your relationship! It’s relatively easy to know your partner is emotionally disconnected, abusive, or unwilling to work on your marriage…but doing something about “what you know for sure” is painful.

Read books, get help. Then relax. You know more than you think – whether you’re confused about divorce or just trying to figure out why you’re so unhappy.

My prayer for you as you learn to develop your intuition is that you take time to stop and think about your relationship, and how you feel with your partner. I pray that you stop focusing on how you WANT to feel and how you WISH things were, and instead you see your relationship with clarity. May God bring you peace as you develop intuition in your relationship, and learn how to follow your heart and soul. May you take the freedom, love, and joy that can be so easily yours – and may you shake off the chains that hold you back from living the life He has intended for you.

I welcome your thoughts on developing intuition in your relationship. How do you connect with your inner self, what signs do you receive that tell you you’re on the right track? I can’t offer advice, but you may find it helpful to share your experience.


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4 thoughts on “6 Ways to Develop Intuition in Your Relationships

  • Miriam

    I believe God led me to this article today. I have always had an intuition that was unshakable. In addition, I have also ran from it. You see I was raised believing that such gifts were from the dark side. I now see how God allows these gifts via His word and the Holy Spirit.
    I am now feeling the heartbreak of a relationship that I knew would betray me ( not my husband- he’s really a great guy). God was warning me weeks before to refrain and take time to listen to God. I confronted this person that I’ve know for over 20 years and they lied. Later they confessed and asked for forgiveness. I am no one to not give forgiveness but I needed time to process such betrayal.
    You said that intuition can be a feeling. I feel relief and God’s continual guidance in the situation. People can always try and twist things around to benefit their own shortcomings yet God is clear. I will strive this year to see that clarity in the gift He has given me. Thank you.

  • Laurie Post author

    I agree, Dee – it can be very difficult to know if that still small voice or gut instinct is indeed intuition… or if it’s another part of you that’s acting out of the need for security, or to avoid scary decisions in relationships. It really is difficult to go against what’s normal for us (and our families), to follow our intuition into the scary unknown….

    The best way to develop intuition is to gain experience with yourself, your decisions, your life. Learning how to recognize that still small voice – intuition – takes practice and time. I don’t think there are any clear or solid answers that can come from outside. Also, if I were you, I’d read books about intuition and trusting that still small voice. That’s how I came to learn what intuition feels like to me. That, and experience!

    Also, intuition feels like a green light. You know that the path ahead isn’t free from dangers or problems, but it just feels right. Or, it can feel like a red light – you can tell that the path ahead (eg, to stay in an unhealthy relationship) feels wrong and not “you.” There might be feelings of fear and discomfort that accompany both decisions – such as to stay or leave a relationship – but that’s separate from the feeling that this particular decision is right for you.

    I don’t know if I’m explaining it well, but I would encourage you to read books by Martha Beck. Also, the ones I mentioned in my article. Developing intuition is a fascinating process that takes time, but it’s worth it!


  • Dee

    I have a very hard time knowing the difference between developing intuition in you relationship and overthinking.

    So for example, I was in a very intense and often chaotic relationship and my “gut” said, “you’re in over your head, this won’t end good, get out”. I felt panicked at times when thinking this. The thoughts happened often, any usually it would be this very “clear” voice that said end it. BUT…. I am wondering if this was just my discomfort with going against what was normal for me and what I thought others would accept, because there was intense closeness and comfort with this person, and in moments of calm, when I didn’t care what others thought, I wanted to stay? Which one was intuition??

  • Lisa

    My husband been fired from three job behind women I hear him talking about me to his coworkers saying I was crazy I feel in my heart he cheat and still cheat I ask him he keep saying he will never cheat on me