Here are a few signs he’s not right for you and you should stop dating him. These tips are inspired by a reader who thinks she should break up with her boyfriend…
If you’re confused about your boyfriend, read Not Your Mother’s Rules: The New Secrets for Dating (The Rules) by Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider. Don’t fall into a convenient relationship, or a partnership of desperation! Trust me, you’ll have so many regrets in the future if you ignore the warning signs and keep dating him. If you think he’s not right for you, then you need to listen to these signs it’s time to stop dating him!
“I have been going out with my boyfriend for 10 months and I don’t know why, but I feel like I’m always doubting him,” says J. on Unfaithful Boyfriends – 7 Signs of Betrayal in Love. “I don’t know how honest he is with me. What should I do?”
The first sign he’s not right for you is that you’re doubting him, you’re always going back and forth, and you found an article about unfaithful boyfriends.
Signs You Should Stop Dating Him
I can’t tell J. if he’s right for her or not. I think the answer is somewhere inside of her, and she needs to find the strength and courage do take the next step.
Here are a few thoughts on finding the right answers…
Trust your instincts
I explain how important your instincts are in When You Have a Bad Gut Feeling About Your Marriage. Those red flags won’t go away and the relationship won’t get better, my friend. If you’re uncertain about him – if something is telling you that you should leave – then you need to stop dating him immediately. Your “Spidey senses” are picking up on something that you may not even be conscious of, and you have to honor that.
Stop trying to be someone you’re not
“I try to be cute and lovey dovey cuz thats just how I am,” says J. “But this always makes him say to ‘stop with the corny stuff.’”
If you can’t be yourself with your boyfriend when you’re dating, you won’t enjoy suppressing your personality when you’re married or living together! If he can’t accept you for who you are without telling you to stop, then it’s time to stop dating him and find a guy who loves you for who you are.
Do you struggle with personal identity and relationships? Read How to Be Yourself With Your Boyfriend.
Be honest about how interested he is in you
How does he react to your concerns or wishes for your relationship? If he’s right for you, he’ll do everything he can to build a healthy, loving relationship. He’ll want to spend time with you and make you happy.
“The thing that really annoys me is that he’d rather hang with his friends,” says J. “He texts all the time, but always away from me. Occasionally he’ll show me a text from one of his buddies. I don’t know if I should suspect this as being unusual behavior or if I’m just paranoid.”
Figure out why you keep dating him
If he’d rather hang out with his friends, then why are you dating him? If you’re not getting what you need from your relationship, then you know it’s time to end it – especially if he shows no interest in meeting you halfway.
J says she’s been contemplating breaking up with him, but keeps going back and forth. I don’t know why she stays with him – perhaps out of fear, insecurity, or hope. The best way for her or anyone to decide if a guy is right is to figure out what’s keeping you in the relationship. Why are you ignoring your feelings of doubt? Why are you continuing to date a guy who can’t or won’t give you what you need?
Don’t waste your time wondering if he’s right for you. If he is the right man, you’ll know it.
If you’re lonely when you’re dating, read What to Do When You Feel Alone in a Relationship.
What do you think – what are some signs it’s time to stop dating a guy? How do you know if he’s right for you? Comments welcome below…I can’t give dating or relationship advice, but it might help you to share how you feel.
May you have clarity and insight when you’re deciding if you should stop dating him.