What do you do when your relationship is the most disappointing part of your life? You’re not alone if you’re facing a broken relationship – you fell in love with a prince, and after years of marriage he turned into a frog.
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The following help for what to do when your prince turns into a frog are inspired by a reader.
“I married the man of my dreams,” says L. on Is My Marriage Over? “Or so I thought. We have been married for 18 years, and together for 20. It was never easy, we had a long distance relationship in the beginning, and moved to another country. Money was always an argument. I always worked full time and took care of our daughter…but I was never good enough…sometimes I hate him…what do I do?”
Help for Broken Relationship – When Princes Turn Into Frogs
These tips may help you see your relationship in a different light, and help you move on…
Figure out why you’re still in the marriage
“He killed my love for him,” says L. “Over time, I grew to hate him more than I love him. What keeps me in this marriage is the illusion of being madly in love with the man I fell in love with 20 years ago.”
She’s holding on to the prince she married, and can’t accept that that he has changed. There are many reasons women stay in broken love relationships…and the first step towards growth and healing is figuring out why you’re still with him. Sometimes, learning the reason you’re holding on can lead to the solution and to a better, happier, healthier marriage.
Read Why Do Women Stay in Loveless Marriages? 5 Reasons for help.
Decide where you want to be in one year
Where do you want to be in one year? Who do you want to be with? Where do you want to live? What do you want your life to look like? How do you want to spend your time?
Write it all down. Don’t worry about hurting your children, solving your marriage problems, getting a divorce, or how your frog will react to your ideal life. Just write for at least 15 minutes, getting more and more specific about your ideal life. Feel free to write your ideal life in the comments section below.
Figure out how you will create the life you want
Yes, you can have the life you want! You don’t have to stay in a marriage of broken dreams and ghosts of the past. You don’t have to live with broken love, or a frog who was once the prince of your life.
The way I see it, you have three options:
1) Stay in your marriage the way it is, and accept that this is your life, your husband, and your future. Read Too Good to Leave, Too Bad to Stay – Help for Failing Marriages.
2) Convince your husband that you want to save your marriage by rebuilding it together, as a couple. Read How Do I Save My Marriage From Divorce? 6 Ways to Reconnect.
3) Try a trial separation, or leave your marriage altogether. Read Thinking About Divorce? 4 Options for Unhappy Married Couples.
Take your broken relationship to a new level
Here’s where the real work comes in: you have to create a plan that will get you from Point A (where you are right now) to Point B (where you want to go – one of the three options above).
Quick tips for changing your life:
- Realize that people will be affected and possibly even hurt by your decisions. Children, parents, friends, and even coworkers may react negatively…and some will respond positively to your decision to end a broken love relationship.
- Decide that even though the path you choose (acceptance of broken love, reconnecting with your husband, or separating) will be rough, it’s still the right decision for you. Just because something is hard doesn’t mean it’s not right.
- Talk to someone in person – a counselor, trusted friend or family member, pastor, mentor. Get objective support and help.
Sometimes frogs can change back into princes, and broken marriages can be saved! The first step is to figure out what you want from your life and marriage. The second step is to figure out if it’s possible. And the third step is to forge ahead, one step at a time.
For more tips for broken relationships, read 10 Signs of Good Relationship Advice.
What are your tips for broken love or failing marriages, for princes who turned into frogs? Comments welcome below. I can’t offer advice on princes, frogs, or broken relationships – but sometimes it helps to share who you’re feeling.