When You Can’t Trust Your Intuition – Blossom Tip 26


Yesterday I was walking with my teenage friend, who is 17 years old. We’ve known each other for six years; she takes care of our dogs when we travel. Her favorite sport is rugby and the season has finally started. Yay! Mostly.

“Last week, the substitute rugby coach patted my bum,” she said. “I didn’t feel right about it. I hated it, actually, but I didn’t know what to do. I was totally caught off guard! And I didn’t know if it was okay for a coach to do that.”

“It’s not okay for anyone to do that,” I said. “You have to trust your intuition! If you think something feels weird, then it’s wrong.”

“But because of my past, I always feel scared and anxious when a man even touches my shoulder,” she said. “I can’t trust my natural reaction because I know it’s wrong a lot.”

Oh. It hadn’t occurred to me that a history of abuse — or even failed relationships — affects our ability to trust our intuition. My young friend can’t trust herself to make good decisions with men in her life, because of the horrible actions of one boy.

We decided it doesn’t matter if a man’s physical contact with her body is socially acceptable. What matters is how she perceives that action. If she isn’t comfortable with a man touching her anywhere, she has the right and the responsibility to say something. Maybe this means yelling, or running away. It doesn’t matter how she gets away or responds; what matters is that she feels comfortable.

 



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Do you trust your intuition? 

If not, your first step is simply becoming aware when something doesn’t feel right for you. Then, practice small ways to speak up. You might begin by simply writing in your journal or talking with a friend. Then, consider talking to the person who is making you uncomfortable — or perhaps find someone who can act as a mediator or advisor. 

Your intuition may not be 100% reliable right now. Even the healthiest, most spiritually grounded women sometimes wonder if their intuition is right! Start slow, learn to pay attention when your “Spidey senses” start tingling.

“Give yourself permission to make mistakes,” says Blossy. “Drop your fear and pick up your faith. Trust God to lead you in the right direction – even if it’s into an unknown future!”

 

Do You Trust Your Intuition Blossom Tip 26

Blossy

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May you find peace, wisdom and clarity as you move through the rest of your week. Take good care of yourself, for you are worth taking good care of!

In peace and passion,

Laurie and Blossy

 

On “She Blossoms” this week

In How to Trust Your Intuition After a Failed Relationship, I share two ways to trust your gut after a breakup or divorce.

And in How to Trust Your Intuition When Dealing With Toxic Coworkers, I offer five Blossom Tips for difficult work environments.

Last week’s theme was overcoming setbacks! If you missed it, read Do You Truly Know How to Overcome Setbacks? — Blossom Tip 25.

 


Do you need encouragement and inspiration? Click here for my free Blossom Tips newsletter! One email a week, short and sweet.

xo


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2 thoughts on “When You Can’t Trust Your Intuition – Blossom Tip 26

  • Edna

    Always trust your gut feeling (intuition). Yes learn to be assertive (something I am not good at) and speak up when it feels wrong.
    A few years ago, I was at a luxurious resort in Mexico. The first day we were there, we were lured, manipulated and pushed into meeting with a times share representative over “free breakfast”, so we caved into their tactics. (Afterall, we thought, we could still say no to buying into a timeshare at breakfast). Little did we know how good these people were at lying, manipulating and pressuring. They do not take no for an answer. We were kept for four hours and each time we said “no” we were given another rep. To deal with. One rep even got mad at me, so that got me riled too. Because I got angered, we were escorted to the patio away from the other guests who were also being manipulated. I thought that would be the end of the sales pitches, however, we had another rep talk to us. I again said no and he said we could go downstairs for some parting gifts. There were, however, no gifts. We had another rep, a smooth talker and one who made promises that were lies. Long story short, we ended up buying a $5, 000 seven year membership; that was not everything we were promised.we would get. Even as my husband was purchasing the membership with his credit catd, my gut was screaming “No this does not feel right”. My.mind however said “This. Could just be your imagination because you worry about everything”. Again, always trust your gut feelings.
    I have since been back to the resort, to get some good out of my membership. Again,we were approached the same day to “upgrade” our membership. This time I was firm, even rude (which embarassed my husband). They again were pressuring us and asked why we did not want to see their sales people. An honest question deserves an honest answere so I said “I don’t trust you guys because you are liars and manipulators. I am here for a holiday and not to waste 4 to 7 hours of my time arging with sales people.” They still did not take no for an answer. They waived the $25 fee for breakfast and scheduled us to see a rep. I, however had nothing to lose this time as I did not have to go and made no promise to see anyone. Instead, I went to their office at the resort and complained about their tactics and again reiterated that they were liars and manipuators and I would not be doing business with them. My husband thought I was too harsh and unkind but I did get.us out of talking to the time shares sales people. I think sometimes you have to be nasty or you will be a door mat. I am a passive person and not assertive so this was out of character for me to speak to anyone like that. Go with you gut and don’t feel bad when you need to be firm or even harsh!!!

    • Laurie Post author

      I agree, Edna – you have to be firm and assertive, and that sometimes comes off as harsh and unkind! But sometimes, that’s all that people respond to. Especially salespeople, who seem to be able to ignore what you say unless it’s “yes, I’ll buy it.” I’m glad you stood up for yourself! We need to do that more often.

      But I’m sorry you didn’t get as much as you hoped for, out of that resort. Funny….my husband is also more prone to buying stuff like that than I am. I see through it, and it must be women’s intuition. It’s just odd, though. I remember being so surprised when I found out my husband tended to be more kindhearted and prone to buying stuff than I am. He also doesn’t like to barter for stuff, or negotiate. I on the other hand will walk away if I don’t get the best deal! 🙂

      Thanks for sharing, Edna. You’re a wise woman.

      With love,
      Laurie