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Not Getting Pregnant – Adventures in Infertility

If you’re not getting pregnant as fast as you hoped, check out Kathleen Puls Andrade’s adventures in infertility for a break from the same old struggles. Her perspective of infertility is totally different — and includes humor and wackiness!

If you feel hopeless and scared, click on the book I Am More Than My Infertility by Marina Lombardo and Linda Parker — it’s a great way to look at life in general and infertility specifically. “This book offers hope and the inspiration of ‘tomorrow’ rather than being stagnant in ‘today'” says Mark Trolice, MD, Founder of Fertile Dreams.

And, read Inspirational Quotations for Couples Coping With Infertility for help staying grounded in hope and inspiration for tomorrow. Okay, here’s Andrade’s perspective on not getting pregnant and having adventures in infertility…

Not Getting Pregnant — Adventures in Infertility

LPK: What is Journey to the Center of the Uterus: Adventures in Infertility?

KPA: It’s a humorously poignant show about my journey through infertility. My goal is to relieve some infertility stress through laughter and original songs. Not getting pregnant is stressful, but there is a light side.

How often do you perform this show — is this your first time?

Journey to the Center of the Uterus: Adventures in Infertility is original, and I hope to begin touring it next year.

How has infertility affect your relationship with your husband?

One of the ways we tended to cope with infertility was to find the funny in just about everything.  It didn’t always work, but my husband would make me laugh even when getting the shots twice a day, or waiting for 12 hours in the hospital for a small procedure or even just when I had to lay around for two days.  That, to us, was a sanity saver.

Can you offer any tips for couples coping with infertility?

Try not to have expectations about getting pregnant that are too high, or too low.  At least that’s what my husband says and I think that’s about right.  Find ways to laugh about everything…even about the people who say stupid things to you, thinking that they’re helping.  In fact, I wrote a composite character for the show who just has the worst foot in mouth disease.  I think that, perhaps, there will be those who see themselves in that character and those who recognize that character.

Do people fail to see the lighter side of infertility?

So far, no one has been offended!  In fact, the feedback I’ve gotten is that they could use a laugh because the whole process of infertility treatments can be so stressful.  

Are you considering adoption or fostering children?

I’ve also written a piece about adoption for the show as well.  We go back and forth about adopting.  We haven’t considered fostering.  I think that takes a special kind of person to foster kids and that’s a very special gift.  I’m sort of OK with where we are now in a way.  

What can you tell people about overcoming fear of infertility?

My sister had her kids at 40 and 42 which made me wonder what’s wrong with me.  But, as she always says, everyone is different when it comes to not getting pregnant.  I was older when I got married so I didn’t really know what to expect. Ends up my anatomy is kind of goofy – I have a tiny uterus…size of a Cheerio!

I feel for those younger women who have gone through in vitro fertilization (IVF) so many times in the hopes of getting pregnant.  Perhaps one way to think of it is to realize that, if you really want to be a parent, there are many ways other than IUI or IVF.  Actually, it killed me when, after finding out about my IVF failures, that people would invariably ask me about adoption.  I thought “hey, I’m not done with this yet!”  But, it is true!  There are a lot of great kids out there who need a great family.

Some final tips about coping with infertility…

If your friends or family is coping with infertility, just listen.  Don’t offer advice, don’t talk about other’s failures and be a good friend.  For those dealing with infertility, find your sense of humor. Don’t take others’ successes at getting pregnant or having children as your personal failure. Everyone is different and we have little and sometimes no control over what our bodies can and cannot do!

If you have any questions or thoughts on not getting pregnant and Andrades’ adventures in infertility, please comment below…

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Kathleen Puls Andrade is an actor and writer in Chicago, who can currently be seen in “Put the Nuns in Charge” (Sequel to Late Nite Catechism) at the Royal George Theater in Chicago. Her show is called Journey to the Center of the Uterus: Adventures in Infertility!.

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