How to Cope With Your Pet’s Death – A Veterinarian’s Help

Two veterinarians describe how they coped with their pets’ death; their words of wisdom may help you say good-bye, grieve, and heal after your pet dies.

“Death…is not more than passing from one room into another,” said Helen Keller. “But there’s a difference for me, you know. Because in that other room, I shall be able to see.” Imagine that your beloved pet can see now, is healed now, and is happy and even waiting for you now….let that comfort you. You are not alone, for your pet is always in your heart.

The following stories about pet loss are from veterinarians who know what you’re going through. If you feel guilty or have regrets about your dog’s death, read How to Find Peace of Mind After Putting a Dog to Sleep. Remember that we all deal with grief differently, and it takes time to heal after losing a dog or cat that we love. Our love for our animals is surprisingly powerful, and healing after pet loss takes time.

A Veterinarian Shares How He Coped With His Pet’s Death

I remember losing our family German Shepherd as a 11 year old. I was devastated and it really was like losing a family member. The loss of a pet should not be taken lightly and it is not something most people get over quickly or easily – although many may think there is a social stigma not to grieve for animals as we do for humans. The fact is that the bond that is formed between people and their pets is in many cases even stronger than some of the bonds between people. Since losing our German Shepherd, I have lost two cats also – one was an elderly girl that had to be put down due to deteriorating health, whilst the other a couple of years later was sadly run over.

Each pet loss had a different effect on me, depending on the bond I had shared with each animal. I was particularly saddened by the death of our German Shepherd because I had grown up with her and because she had always been very close to me in my childhood. ~ From Veterinarian Mark Edwards.

Remember your pet’s life

dealing with pet loss

How to Cope With Your Pet’s Death – A Veterinarian’s Help

An important way to cope with pet death is to focus on you pet’s life rather than the death (regardless of the circumstances in which they died). As for humans, grief is a five step process: denial, anger, bargaining, depression and finally the last stage – acceptance. Once you accept your pet’s death, it is not unreasonable to consider getting a new pet. This is definitely not something you should feel guilty about.

If your pet is still alive, read How to Know When to Put Your Dog Down.

Getting your pet cremated can help you grieve

You can chose to have their ashes given back to you in a wooden casket or an urn and can even have a picture and plaque put on this. Do give yourself plenty of time for the grieving process; you may even want to take time off work. You may be surprised how much the death of your animal affects you when it does finally happen.

Consider getting another pet – after you grieve your pet’s death

“I’ve lost five dogs over the years; the last dog I lost was almost 10 years ago,” says veterinarian Rosie Brown. “None died naturally, I had to euthanize them, and all but one had cancer. The other was euthanized as the result of a bad fall and was only 4 ½ years old.

I’m still sad, particularly about my “very best dog of all time.” She was euthanized years ago, and I still miss her. We did everything together: she came to work with me, we camped together, and I haven’t had a dog like her since. Coping with grief because of your dog’s death takes time. Losing a pet is like losing a family member. You always feel a degree of sadness, but after a while it doesn’t hurt so much.

Some people like to get a new pet straight away because the loss of the old pet leaves such a hole. If you’ve always had a dog around the house, and then all of a sudden there isn’t one that can exacerbate the great sense of loss. In that case, a new pet can give you something to love and hug while you grieve the loss of the old pet. However, people need to be very careful not to compare the new pet to the old pet, as it will never measure up.

Remember with a pet memorial

How to Cope With Your Pets Death

How to Cope With Your Pets Death

A Grasslands Road Pet Memorial Picture Frame is a beautiful way to honor your pet’s memory. This Pet Memorial Frame features a heartfelt sentiment and sculpted heart with paw print and golden halo.

If you have to put your cat or dog to sleep, it’s normal to go through the normal stages of grief: shock, denial, anger, guilt… I think denial and guilt are the two biggies when you have to say good-bye to your dog or cat.

Many people feel guilt about choosing to “kill” their pet but it’s not like that at all. If it comes to euthanasia, then you and your veterinarian know your pet’s quality of life will not be good. There’s nothing that can be done to make it better. You’re actually doing them a great kindness to end their suffering.

Read 5 Types of Cremation Urns for Your Dog’s Ashes for different ways to memorialize your pet.

Be kind to yourself

After your dog or cat has been put to sleep, be very kind to yourself and allow yourself to cope when your dog or cat dies. Take as long as you need to. Surround yourself with friends and family who understand what your pet meant to you, and who will listen to you and support you. The worst thing you can hear is “it’s only a dog, you can get another one.” Avoid people with that attitude, because it will only make you feel worse.

how to heal after losing your petIf you’re struggling with grief and guilty feelings because of the circumstances surrounding your dog or cat’s death, read How to Heal Your Heart After Losing a Pet: 75 Ways to Cope With Grief and Guilt When Your Dog or Cat Dies.

I interviewed veterinarians, grief counselors, and pet experts for the best ways to survive the death of a beloved dog or cat, and I included stories from real pet owners who coped with guilt and grief in sometimes surprising ways.

This ebook will help if you’re struggling with grief and guilty feelings because of the circumstances surrounding your dog or cat’s death. You’ll see you’re not alone, and you’ll learn how others coped with their pets’ deaths.

How are you coping with your pet’s death? I invite you to share below; describing your dog or cat’s life and death can help you heal. I can’t offer advice on how to cope with your pet’s death, but it may help you to share your experience.


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578 thoughts on “How to Cope With Your Pet’s Death – A Veterinarian’s Help”

  1. I had to put Blackie to sleep April 9, 2020. One of the hardest things I had to do. I knew I’d be up all night with him. He had kidney disease and I was trying everything possible to keep him around but when he started have trouble with his back legs and started crying that morning something he’s never done I knew it was time. It killed me and is still killing me. I found him as a stray around my house. He was suppose to be an outdoor cat but that was the year hurricane Katrina hit the New Orleans Area so he became an indoor cat and a adopted brother to my other cat Princess. She was a tortoise shell and really didn’t care for him but they managed. Lol. Actually I was going to name Blackie Ebony but when I took him to the vet thinking I had a little female I found out I had a neutered male. Hence the name Blackie. 🙂. Sadly I had to put Princess to sleep at the age of nine with kidney or live failure she was my little heart and if I didn’t have my Blackie there to help my through I see what condition I would have been in. The same one I’m in now after losing Blackie. He was my shadow. He was with me all the time. Blackie was all I had to come home to. My baby woke me up in the morning. He laid with me in the chair watching tv. He slept with me behind my legs in bed. If I fell asleep in the chair he’d wake me up to go get in bed. I even think he may have gotten in my face to wake me up at times when I didn’t wear my breathing mask to bed because I stopped breathing because there were times he’d be right in my face head butting me. Waking me up. I really miss him. I was goi g to call one of the rescue places today to go visit a cat but I started crying. So I really don’t know if I’m truly ready or not yet. I just don’t know. I’m still crying and it’s been almost two months. He was my best bud. Like I said. He followed me all over the house. He loved me as much as I loved him. ❤️❤️❤️

  2. I lost my dear cat Sabbath last night. She pretty much adopted me and moved herself into my little work/garage area outside and became a permanent fixture ever since then, which has only been about a year or so. I feed and gave her fresh water and treats every night and I always said goodnight to her. She must have had a rough life before me because she would not allow anyone to touch her at all and would hiss and swat at anyone who tried to pet her. I understood this and I just accepted her for her and just kept taking care of her and loving her because I did love her very much and I think she loved me too cuz she would follow me anywhere I went in the yard doing whatever I needed to do, she was always right there. A couple weeks ago she started rubbing against my legs and allowing me to scratch her little head while saying good night to her and she would even close her eyes while I was doing this. I made a special little bed outside for her and in the past winter months I even had a space heater out there for her, I know it’s not the smartest thing but it was a safe space heater and I didn’t have anything go wrong and I just didn’t want her to be cold, I think she was an older cat, maybe 10 or so, I wanted her to be completely comfortable, and she was, finally. Then last night I walk outside and saw a dark spot in the road and this is hard for me to even think about now but she was hit by a car or truck and the dark spot was her lifeless little body which I ran into the road and screaming no no no I picked her up and I made her a little box and I’m going to go and put her to rest someplace beautiful, like her, she was my constant outside companion and it’s hard to think of anything that will bring me joy right now because I am in so much pain I can barley keep it together anymore

  3. Absolutely heartbroken at losing my little pussycat Lucy … hit by a car three days ago. She had been abandoned about two years ago while pregnant, and was taken in by my next door neighbour’s employers … but after the kittens were shared around, no one wanted Lucy. My neighbors took her in … but she was terrified of their large dogs … so she kept coming to me. When I noticed that she was pregnant again, I confronted my neighbors about me keeping her. They immediately realised that I was a cat lover … and agreed. After the initial vet attention, she settled in like she was in heaven. It coincided with my retirement, so she had my undivided care and attention. She had so many special idiosyncrasies that she shared in my life. She spent so much time with me, in the garden, working in the shed, on the couch watching tv, and sleeping on the bed with me every night … climbing under the covers during the early hours just to be close to me. But my world fell apart on Sunday when my same neighbors contacted me to tell me that she had just been hit by a car, and didn’t make it. My girlfriend was with me, shared the grief, and we both spent some time nursing her in her favourite spots, before burying her beneath her favourite playing tree in the backyard. My neighbors have been great, my Facebook post was flooded with lovely messages, my partner and my friends have been wonderful … but I am still gutted. She had a rough start in life, she was now in a wonderful home and was happy, contented and well looked after. Why was this all taken away so soon ? PS I have a coffee cup with her picture on it … she keeps looking at me asking “why did I die dad, I was a good girl, and you love me” . I have no idea what to tell her. I have no idea whether anyone will read this … but sharing helps just a little bit.

    1. Terry, so sorry to read about Lucy. As you say, she had a tough start in life and had just found a loving home and then it was all taken away. I had a similar incident when we gave a home to Misty who had been abused. She was a wonderfully, sweet cat and sadly she was not with us that long before she was run over and sadly died. Life sucks and can be cruel and unfair and the ones that suffer are the ones that never deserve it. sorry for your loss, Terry but remember Lucy had a wonderful, if brief, life with you

  4. Patches my cat was 17 years old and he was so special and funny,but one day he lost the use of his back legs and watching him struggle tore my heart out so I talked to the vet and it was decided to put him to sleep and I feel so guilty because I keep thinking could I have done more to fight for him,it’s been one day since he passed and all I do is burst into tears there’s no one to talk to and I feel so alone and empty inside

    1. My situation is similar to yours. Had to put my 14 year old dog to sleep three days ago. I was his primary care giver. My husband and adult children don’t understand how I feel. They say he lived a good life and he’s at peace now. I am so sad and the house feels empty. I’ve cried so much my eyes are swollen. I know time will heal but it hurts so bad now

      1. Hi Susan
        My situation is similar to yours. I had to put my beautiful 15 year old Lucky to sleep yesterday and I’ve never felt this kind pf pain. I don’t even know how to begin to process it, my head is all over the place and I can’t find any comfort. Are you feeling a little better now?

    2. I’m sorry for your loss Karen, 17 yrs is a long time to have loved and been loved by your furbaby and you’re lucky to have had so long together so take comfort in that :) The fact your cat was loved when many others aren’t is also something to hold on to. I have a big grey stray cat who comes to get fed every day, I bet he wishes he’d had a mum like you!
      When I lost my dog almost 2 yrs ago I thought I’d never be okay, I cried for him more than I have for any human who’s passed and I don’t feel bad saying that cause he was my baby and I’m sure you’re feeling a bit the same just now, also with the isolation in place it makes it harder. There’s probably groups on facebook if you’re on there with many people in the same situation thinking they have no one to talk to but there are other people who want to listen and share their story with you.
      Anyway I wanted to reply as I wrote on here when I lost my dog as I had no one to speak to about how I really felt and how much I was hurting and no one replied but tbh there’s nothing anyone could have said to make me feel better, grief is the same with an animal as with a person, you go through the stages of grief and you will feel better, don’t get me wrong, there’s not a day passes that I don’t think of my dog (I have other dogs now tho)I will miss him till the day I die but I did stop sobbing every night in the shower, randomly through the day, it does get better (I still have a cry occasionally in the shower tho)but I know I have to go on with out him so I hope you feel a bit better with each day and when you’re ready I’m sure your cat would want you to have another furbaby to give a loving home to, it will be a very lucky and very loved cat…hugs, Mary xx

  5. Im only 15 and my cat named fate is only 6 and the bond i had with her was unreal. i lived her more than anything. Last Friday she threw up and wasn’t acting like herself so my mom brought her to the vet and they decided to keep her until Monday because they thought she ate something poisonous. Then Monday came and when my mom picked me up from school she had to tell me the bad news and we drove straight to the clinic to get her put down. Apparently she had kidney cancer and she was gonna die a painful death. I know it was the right thing to do it just really hurts because she was so young. Fate died in my arms and ill never unsee it. I haven’t stopped crying and it feels like I never will.

    1. Natalina, I hope you are a bit better now, I never seen your comment till now, how are you doing? I hope you are a bit better :)

  6. My little tom cat Florio just passed away this morning as the mass bells rang. We grew up together and he was my constant companion through some of the toughest times of my life before this. We noticed he was losing weight in the summer but he gained it all back and than he started losing it again in the autumn. Florio had issues in the past with stress related weight loss so we put it down to that until he started getting really bad. I still blame my parents for not getting him into the vet soon because I was begging them to in late November when he really started going downhill. We took him and the vet discovered a lump in his abdomen. They told us he would almost certainly die on the operations table and most likely would pass alone and scared if they did any more tests. Judging from the state he was in, they said he probably won’t survive the weekend. Defying all thoughts, our sweet cat pushed through the Christmas season. He was clearly going down; losing more weight and weakening, but he was in no pain. A few days before he passed, he really began to stop eating almost completely and than spent even more time sleeping. He was skeletal before he passed and I think the saddest I will ever was him lying on the floor after walking five steps. We knew he was close and he slept with my mom downstairs last night. She said his breathing was irregular and he completely stopped drinking. I picked him up this morning and carried him into the chair where we always would sit together. I think he had a mini heart attack but than he seemed to come back a little. He went into a stupor that he occasionally would jerk out of. During one of these times, he tucked his head into my arm like he always used to. I shifted him so he was curled up on my chest like he always liked to do and watched as his breathing became shallower and came in gasps until he took his final breath. I talked to him until I knew he could no longer hear me. I still feel like the world worst pet owner for not noticing how bad he was earlier and than really begging my parents to take him in. He has a littermate named Hannah and I’m so worried she’ll die of grief like one of my grandparents cats did after his brother died. Florio is going to be hard but if I lose Hannah on top of it… I’m not sure if I’ll be able to keep going. We got them as kittens because my mother couldn’t have any more kids and I wanted younger siblings. So they technically adopted me as their big, non-furry sister. My big tom, you were only 10 and a half. Your sisters will miss you as will your playmate, our biggest cat, Fern

  7. My dear Chihuahua girl, Montana Sky I had to put to sleep last year at 16 and a half. We had good times and hard times but she forgave me when I acted stupidly. After a year I’m still a wreck! She told me in her way she was ready. It’s more than her death that eats at me. The Vet just walked out! He said NOTHING! He gave my girl pain and said nothing. It eas comforting when he said she looked good for her age but his lack of empathy kills me! His walking out kills me! Yet he was very gentle whwn my second cat had to be put down. But my girl? He acted like it was nothing! I got more sympathy from the lady who was holding my girl fir the procedure. I had to comfort my girl after the Vet gave her pain and had to start again. If my Vet showed more compassion then my girl’s death wouldn’t be so hard.

    It’s not eaay for me to get another dog because people have tried to scam me! I love my 19 year old cat and when he goes I’ll be alone.

    I miss my girl so much. I kbow she loved me as she tried to comfort me the night before. I just can’t seem to cope with her loss. She helped me with my anxieties.

  8. I lost my dog and she was a lovely she was called sadie and I grow up with her. sadie was just a year old then me I lost on 11 of June 2019 and am 13 so she was almost 15 her birthday was a couple of month late and am so sad without I don’t stop crying because when they dad they was 2 things they could do put her at rest or find out what they could do to save her and they went to say that she could need an operation and as soon as she said that my dad new that she 90%chance that she couldn’t make it but was he right are should of give it go I don’t kwon I just wish that she still her because I would feel much better than crying in my bedroom because I would do anything for her and now she gone I don’t be at home anymore because before that my great grandma pass away I just wish she her and then I could pause time and get old so then we could be together for ever but at least she not in pain no more RIPSadie

  9. I lost my beautiful r yr old spaniel archie on 4.6.19 he fell and broke his leg which was unrepairable .the vet did say bout amputation but could cause complication so we had decided to let him lay to rest .he was fit and healthy. And spoilt rotten and it broke my and familys hearts to lose him as we had him from 8 weeks old .i will never forget all the good memories we had loss is so hard for me to accept but we will all be reunited with our pets whos gone one day .stay strong .

  10. My beautiful Ruby girl died 4 days ago. She was only a year old and we only had her for a month. She was a rescue being fostered in Victoria BC, having come up from California where she was due to be put to sleep, so a rescue society got her out and saved her. We adopted her shortly there after. She was the perfect little puppy. German shepherd cross with lab and likely some pitbull, she had the best temperament, she was smart, Loving, cuddly, and a wonderful companion to my 10-year-old golden retriever. She honestly checked every box, and was a dream dog, a perfect addition to our family.
    She was always with me so that I could keep an eye on her as she was a chewer and she got into everything. But she was quickly learning that there were rules. And she was doing so well with her training. When I couldn’t be around to supervise her, she was placed in her crate
    Which she never complained about. About a week ago when I was out, my kids let her out of her crate and she must have gotten into the garbage while they weren’t watching her. On the weekend she started to feel sick. First it was throwing up then it was not being able to poop. Before I knew it we were in the emergency clinic where they suspected a blockage. On Tuesday they called me and told me that they had tried to get her to pass whatever was in her intestines, but it wasn’t coming out. They said I needed to make a decision. Put her down Or agree to exploratory surgery. Of course I agreed to the surgery however when they went in they found pieces of I wouldn’t barbeque skewer that she had chewed up and it had perforated her a little Paul, causing all sorts of havoc and distraction. The surgeon called me partway through the surgery and told me the best thing to do would be to put her or agree to exploratory surgery. Of course I agreed to the surgery however when they went in they found pieces of a wooden barbeque skewer that she had chewed up and it had perforated her little bowel, causing all sorts of havoc and destruction. The surgeon called me partway through the surgery and told me the best thing to do would be to euthanize her. We had to let her go.
    My beautiful Ruby was perfect in every single way. I can’t get over the heartbreak and the guilt and the loss I feel. It consumes me day and night and I don’t know how to move forward. The worst part about it is watching my golden retriever look for her in the house. He is not a dog that takes well to other dogs and he just loved Ruby. Rest in peace my beautiful Ruby girl you will never ever be forgotten ?

  11. I lost both my beloved cats a month apart. The older cat was 16, she stopped eating and seemed confused a lot, so I put her to sleep. I found out a week later my other 12 year old cat had cancer. I put her on chemo, but she suffered a medical episode and died in my basement while I was on the phone with my vet.

    I didn’t take the first death very well, and the second death broke me. I cry every day and feel like my heart is broken. I don’t feel like myself and I’m not sure what to do about it.

    1. I feel exactly the same my mom died Feb 2018 I lived with my mom all my life there was only mom me and our cat patch my died of pneumonia in a week it was a total shock but then just 4 months later my cat went off his food I had had him for 11 years he was an indoor cat for 7 years so he was with me and mom every day he was so loving and gentle cat the vets said both his kidneys were enlarged and toxins were getting into his bloodstream he had 3 iv flushes but it didn’t help he was put to sleep in front of my eyes at the vets I saw his little head go down it totally broke my heart we were always together at night mom me and patch all sat in the same room together and talked and watched the TV patch was always in his chair with us losing both of them has broke my heart completely I am alone now and had to sell moms house as well after 48 years there I just cry every day it is so lonely without them I don’t know how everything that was so good has gone so bad

  12. Monday morning 3 days ago, Shadow my cat didn’t come upstairs, it happens rarely but it has happened. I thought he was probably downstairs. When i was close to downstairs i saw him laying. When he didn’t answer me i screamed because something inside me knew. Ivy my other cat has always been with him. I love them both dearly I am in a lot of pain right now

  13. Thank you good advise. Just had my darling cat put to sleep. She was 14 but it hurts like mad. Keep crying feel like my hearts been ripped from my chest
    But she had cancer could have kept her for another month or so, but she was very weak I do feel like I’ve killed her because she was fighting so hard to stay alive. Hope this guilty feeling goes driving myself mad

  14. My dog Buzo died this morning. He’s a bully kutta but only by name he had the soul of a golden retriever. He was such a playful dog. I’m having a very hard time to realise that he’s not sleeping right next to my room. It still seems to me that he’s sleeping right there and will be there in the morning when I’ll wake up.
    He was 1.5 years old and died due to bloating. It’s really unfair that these creatures have such a short life span it’s just really wrong.

  15. My dog died on December 12. He was a chihuahua mix and had heart failure. I wasn’t prepared for what happened. The previous months had been pleasant, busy, uneventful. This little sweet guy was with me all the time, along with his adopted “brother”. He seemed to want water and drank it during the night. When I woke up in the morning he was already dead.

    I am still grieving and miss him. A strange coincidence: I had another dog five years ago who also died on December 12, 2013. She was nearly 16 and died at home as well. I woke and found her dead in the morning. She was a shepherd mix and I loved her dearly. It is never easy to let go.

  16. We have been here many times and have pets at Rainbow Bridge from goldfish to hamsters, cats and dogs and rabbits.. but we always knew they were ill and it was there time.. In December, Maddoch my gorgeous collie boy was limping, we left it a few days incase he had just tripped and it would heal, we went to the vets who said rest him for a few weeks which we did, thought it was a pulled muscle.. It seemed to heal and he went on h is 4 miles walk and every so often he would lift his paw, i put him on his pain killers and he seemed to do better. In January, we found he was lifting his back paw we booked him into the vets..and they thought it was cruciate ligament and it would cost £3000 for the op. We said fine, 1st step was the xrays and book the specialist.. we were going to bring the bed downstairs so we all could be together, we have 3 other dogs and 2 cats.. In fact the puppy we got him as he was grieving over his soul mate 18 months earlier and was getting down. They adored each other. We took him in last min as he wasnt keen on vets and i went to pay and hubby went to sit in the car and we would pick him up 2 hours later.. Everyone loved Maddoch, we fostered him from 8 weeks old and adopted him, he was a smooth coated tri colour collie and was stunning in his looks, his black coat on the back was like black gloss.. As i was paying our vet came out and shouted me back Karen dont pay can you come back in.. They had sedated him immediately, they had a good feel around his joint which we knew was tender but he said hes found a bone mass.. We were devastated but the xrays would show us to what extent.. We were in a tizz for those two hours and came back.. i could see the xrays and looked for secondary and there it was in his lungs.. We discussed chemo, amputation of his leg but he said this would only give him 4/5 months extra and he thought he was already towards the end.. I am not a lover of chemo not unless it can cure.. i rather have my pet home with his family, the amputation was now out of the question, if there was no secondary then this would have been the way to go.. i looked at my vet and said tell me the truth, your telling me to let him go arnt you.. he said yes.. i think i went myself on the spot and hubby was shaking.. it was a bombshell, we had prepared for ligament and to get him back up and running so to speak.. infact his ligament was perfectly fine.. I wanted to bring him home for one last night but then the vet explained to us that the bone cancer has eaten most of h is leg and you couldnt see his back leg only the front.. and if we took him home there would be a chance his leg could snap altogether.. This ruled that out.. We always said we will always do whats in the best interest for our pets not in ours even though our hearts would break. Maddoch was the softest dog going, when i was ill, he would snuggle up in bed with me, we often laughed and called him the bed bug.. he loved bed.. So he was waking up from the sedation and they re sedated him, i heard him yelp but they said and warned us about this as he was sore.. The vet said he hid it well and he was in immaculate condition and no other sign he had been playing with the puppy in the morning, he was eating and drinking just fine.. So i held my hand over his heart and told him how much we loved him.. in fact all the staff were in tears.. We were just in shock.. We have had a hell of a couple of years, we lost my dad and then my 17 year old collie who was ill and then motherinlaw and now my other dog all within 2 years.. The shock has worn off with Maddoch now and we are dealing with the other dogs who miss there friend.. When we came back two of the dogs sat on the sofa and just howled.. never done this before and they went over to his basket and lifted it upagainst the wall.. the puppy dove into the cushions like Maddoch used to and Fern hid under the table which was Maddochs den when he wanted to chill.. We noticed the last day or so he wanted to sit near the door where it was cooler and was licking his leg, so this cancer was starting to bother him but we already had him booked into the vets and under treatment and on pain killers.. But cannot stop crying.. its now 10 days.. I accept that we did the right thing, god we have gone through everything, but there was no sign of anything other than his paw lifting.. i hate having to euthanise, he wasnt keen on the vets and ran behind hubbys legs to hide.. and i cannot get that out of my mind.. After the shock has gone, the grieving is starting.. i want him back.. i want my boy back.. i know its not going to happen and we have all our pets ashes at home, he was a very very ill boy.. all the others have been ill and we knew eventually they would go due to this but this was totally out of the blue and a bombshell.. and my heart is broke in two.. I allow myself time to grieve and cry its a way of healing.. and the tears have been flowing for the last few days.. the only time i stop is when i run dry.. But as the vet said he was a very brave dog and never showed any sign and hid it very well.. Time is great healer but this is going to take longer than the rest.. and he has left the puppy with some great traits that he passed onto him and he is as soft as Mddoch was..

  17. I lost my 6month old foxy terrier 5 day’s ago to parvovirus, broke my heart he was born in my hands and died in my arms :-( I starting a new diary writing down lil love notes to my wee boy, its helped a lot , only now I have his twin sista who’s grieving she said good bye too him loves on her now. Any way be strong if you lost your furry beloved pet. It gets better. Puppy loves.

  18. My 11 year old Rottweiler Bane was my best friend and I loved him so much I can’t even find the appropriate words to describe what he means/ment to me. Little over 2 weeks ago a few days before xmas I was told he had a huge mass in his spleen and fluid around his organs, after a few days of tests and ct scans my vet told me that he also had about 15 tumors throught his organs so surgery wasn’t really an option he would have had to have chemotherapy and would find recovery hard due to his size and having bad arthritis in his hind legs and that was if he made it through the surgery and even then would only prolong life maybe 6 months if lucky. So I brought him home for two days he wouldn’t eat anything and just layed around not moving much. I then had to take him back to the vet to be put down it was the hardest thing I ever had to do. I have never been so sad in my life and I feel so guilty about putting him down, what if I had opted out for surgery and chemo he might have still been here.. did I take him back tto the vet to early … should I have gotten a second opinion?? I’m not sure I can live with all these thoughts… Right before he went to sleep as he layed almost gone on his favorite blaket with me by his side he lifted his head one last time and and looked me straight in the eyes and put his nose against mine then layed his head down for the last time. This is all I can think of, was he telling me to save him…

    1. Bec, I know how you feel. I am having the same feelings. My multi poo had a stroke on 12/26/18. I went to the vet but took him home for 5 days. He couldnt move and stopped taking liquid food on the 4th day. I tried food again on the 5th day, no luck and I didnt want him to starve to death. My sweet baby went to heaven with help from the vet on New Years Eve. I want him back so he could die at home but that would mean he would starve to death. All I can say is I miss him horribly.

  19. Today, I went to the SPCA and placed an application for a dog. I have been crying everyday for a month because my dog died about a month ago.
    He was mostly an Irish Woof Hound…some mix and he lived a long life for a large breed…almost twelve years old. However, he died of renal failure. So I saw this dog, actually a puppy, St. Bernard/mix and they are holding him for me until the application is approved. All day I have been crying off and on, but I am a great believer in moving on and helping other animals. I have done cat rescue over the years
    and my dog was a rescue. He was a terrible dog, terrible at the vet’s office, any one that came to the house was not welcome, but he was the very best dog for me and I loved him so much and miss him so terribly. I thought writing this might help me. I wonder how long I will continue to cry. I am hoping that I can help this puppy. He is only 10 months old and has been in three different homes. Thanks for reading this.

  20. Thank you, my dog Otto Mathew had a stroke and after nursing him for 5 days he would only take water through a vile. He was crying out because he also had dementia. Otto was a Maltese-poo and was my sweet baby. I tried so hard to nurse him back but it wasn’t going to happen. Otto Mathew went to heaven New Years Eve 2018, just yesterday. Otto was a rescue from someone who did not take the best of care of him. He came to live with me and other brother and sister fur babies about 5 to 6 years ago on Christmas Eve. I loved, loved, loved him so much my sweet baby boy. xoxoxoxoxo

    1. My heart goes out to you Marie. I am also completely devastated after losing my 16 year old fur baby on New Year’s Day (yesterday).
      She had been sick & on heart medication for about a year and a half, so we knew every day was a blessing. Her decline was somewhat gradual, but she still had a lot of spunk and lively hood in her. Then all of a sudden waking up New Year’s Day, she couldn’t hold herself up, my husband picked her up & she seemed like she was having a stroke (spasming, and Flinching). We immediately took her to an all hours emergency animal hospital where the vet told us she was in the process of dying. We wanted to alleviate or prevent any further suffering so we chose to euthanize her. Im feeling tremendous sorrow, which I know is normal when you lose something,/someone you love so dearly….it doesn’t make it any easier knowing it’s “normal”. It’s an actual physical pain, and sometimes I can’t catch my breath
      I wish you much love in your recovery process. Hopefully the memories will bring you more smiles & laughter than tears & heartache. This is what I am hoping for myself too xo

      1. Suzanne, thank you for your feed back and I am also sorry for the loss of your fur baby. I have 5 other dogs and a cat. Oh…..what was I thinking. Otto Mathew was my first dog since adulthood to let go of. I wish you and your husband peace and healing at this most difficult time. BIG HUGS, Marie (aka) Cissy

  21. My heart is breaking for you. I kind of know what you are going through, my Abby was almost 17 years old and she and I were sisters and we were all we had for the last four years. I can’t begin to tell anyone how bad I hurt too. You are not alone. I hope you are feeling better now. I hope I start feeling better soon.

  22. Thank you for sharing your thought! I Agree with you, because when my pet died, I visit our vet and she advised me to get another one and she reminds me that no one can replace my loss dog but there’s a lot of dog are willing to make me happier and needs love and family. So after the pet cremation in The Pet Loss center in Houston TX, we got another pet from the animal shelter and I divert to my new fur baby my loneliness and grief.

  23. Hollis was the coolest, most beautiful Bernese Mountain did ever. We had to send him home today. He would have been 10 years old next month which is pretty impressive for that breed. He was lively and playful up until a week ago. He had become picky with eating and stopped altogether. We took him to an emergency vet (because it was a Saturday of course) and they did some blood work and started him on antibiotics. We took him back to our vet today and he said he was riddled with cancer. Even the vet burst into tears when he came into the room. Hollis truly was a celebrity every where we went. I don’t even know what to do or how to stop crying. My husband bought him almost 10 years ago after struggling with infertility. In a sense, he was my first baby. We got a baby and a puppy all in the same month. It was such a crazy experience.
    A piece of my heart has died today. I hope that it gets easier and I hope he knows how much he was loved.

  24. I lost my 16 year old rescue the 4th of October.. I cry every day and my heart is crushed… I have her in a beautiful urn where a candle stays lit.. Her paw print and picture in shadow box.. along with first toy and her collar leash and tags.. I don’t feel like my life will ever be the same.. There was a time when it was just her and I for awhile… She was my everything… I can’t even begin to tell anyone how hurt I am

    1. Hello my name is Chris I can relate to you losing your cat very much my cat patch was put to sleep because of enlarged kidneys and toxins were getting into his bloodstream and he wasn’t eating he was an indoor cat for seven years so he was with me everyday and every night he was such a gentle happy cat full of fun and full of love he would always lie on his chair up the corner of the room with me and my mom every night we were all in the room together but my mom passed away Feb this year so it was just me and patch in the house but now he has gone as well it is just me on my own and it is very lonely with them both so sorry for your loss to have a cat with you in your life is just a wonderful feeling they give you so much love

      1. I understand how you feel
        My mother died at at home August 2018
        I had been helpIng care for her
        On Christmas Eve my beloved cat aged 14 Ginny died overnight in the vets after having difficulty breathing
        I was devastated too loose my dear friend who was a constant in my life
        This year a year later at this time I find it so hard and I miss him so much
        My life is no the same as before and I am a changed person

  25. I said goodbye to my 11 year old beautiful girl on November 2, 2018. Lola was diagnosed with diabetes when she was
    six years old. We had her diabetes under control so we thought she would be okay for years to come. In July of this year, she wasn’t acting herself so we took her to the vet. Lola had multiple myeloma. A very rare aggressive bone marrow cancer. We did everything to treat this horrible illness but it was too aggressive. In October I knew something was wrong with her so we did more blood work. Her kidneys were failing.

    I feel so very guilty because I tried so hard to help her in this fight and I couldn’t. She had so much going against her. I loved her so much and don’t know how to deal with the grief of her loss. My husband would say she was my Velcro dog because she was everywhere with me.

    Lola Bear was my baby girl and I’m so heartbroken.

  26. I lost my Capone on September 18th he would have been 17 years old the following day. I have cried everyday since he died. I wasn’t home when he died and I feel so guilty that he died alone. He was my best friend and he went everywhere with me. I had him for almost half my life. I never knew what loneliness felt like because he was always by my side. Even with a husband and 3 kids, I have never been so lonely in my life. We buried him in the backyard in his bed and I put a tent over his grave so he wouldn’t get wet when it rained. I am so heartbroken I miss everything about him. I take his toy with me everywhere I go. I loved that dog more than anything. Probably because he taught me what true love means before anyone did. It’s been a month and a half and it hasn’t gotten any easier. I feel like I should have done more for him, I should of demanded the vet to figure out what was wrong with him despite his age I should of never gone to my meeting and I should of stayed home with him. This is the hardest thing I have ever dealt with. I miss Capone more than words can say.

  27. My cat died quite suddenly.
    She was 10 years old and passed away yesterday 23th of October.
    She often got bouts of sickness where she would throw up but be fine afterwards. I should have noticed the difference in this case. She had become lethargic and we should have brought her to the vet sooner.
    She died of anemia. The symptoms looked so much like a cold.
    She was lively and meowed nonestop during the night, a teddy bear in her mouth and placing it everywhere she deemed fit. She was a cuddler and no chainsaw was a match for her purring.
    I miss her dearly. I have her ashes on my bedside table, a bit of hair in a transparent cube and a candle which had been used during her cremation.

    I hope you’re somewhere better even though it wasn’t all that bad here. At least you died painless and that’s all I wanted. No suffering despite your sudden health decline. A swift death even if I never had the chance to say goodbye.

    So I say it now. Goodbye, Laisy ♡

    1. Hi Haley patch’s eyes were green he was always looking up at me the same as your laisy it shows they love and trust us I miss him lying on the bed with me like he did every night and I miss holding his little paws to keep them warm he used to tap my nose very gently to get me up as well . every day I feel guilty and regret about taking him to the vets and having to sign a form for him to be put to sleep I never thought that would happen ever because he was always healthy he trusted me always and in effect I took him to his death I know the vet said the toxins in his blood were getting worse but it hurts me every day to know he was put to sleep I just didn’t want him to be in any pain I look round the house too and think if all the places he used to be and how he used to run around and play I even miss not seeing his milk dish where it has been all these 7 years he has been in the house life is so empty without patch and my mom as well its gone from such a happy house to just emptiness

      1. Hello, Chris
        Oh, that reminds me. Laisy loved food and when my mom wasn’t home, she would paw at my chest and meow loudly to get me out of bed. She was very noisy, but I loved it.
        I wish I could hug you because we both really need one right now. I can’t even begin to imagine what it actually must be like to put your beloved pet to sleep. Aiding in his death instead of healing him like you might have promised. At least, that’s what I promised Laisy when I brought her to the vet. I told her she would get better and come back home with me all healthy and happy. I didn’t think she would die that same day. Call it being lucky or not, but I didn’t have to put her to sleep. The down side to that is that I never had the chance to say goodbye and while I wouldn’t have wanted to see her dying, I feel so bad for not having said goodbye.

        I’m terribly sorry, Chris. I truly wish I could do something to help you.. but I can’t even help myself with this. It’s just so painful.

    2. Hello hayley you are right it was the worst most horrible thing in the world knowing I signed the consent form for patch to be put to sleep knowing I only had a few more minutes with my little cat who I had been with all these years and all of the so many happy times we had together and how loving and playful he always was it broke my heart totally I just didn’t want him to be in any pain but all his life he was so healthy so I never ever even needed to think or imagine him ever needing to be put to sleep I just never thought this would happen it shattered me to pieces when I saw his little head go down after the vet injected the anesthetic in to him to this day and the rest if my life I wish I would have bought him back home like we always have come back home from the vets together it felt like I was saying he couldn’t come home but I didn’t want that I did want him to come home where he has always been so happy and comfortable but I knew at the same time he wasn’t eating and he had lost weight but his head was up and his little ears were up I just wish I would have took him home and just to see how he was after a few days at home I still don’t know if I did the right thing but I guess again I just didn’t want him to be in any pain I too wish we could hug because we both love our cats with all of our hearts I just wish both our cats were here with us it is so heartbreaking

      1. You can vent all you want, I understand the need to talk about it. I’m feeling exactly the same.
        There’s just this nagging feeling of guilt ever present. As if it’s our fault somehow, but all we did was try to help them. I can’t say I signed a form to put her to sleep, because that would have broken me completely. I merely brought her to the vet with a spoken promise for her to get better and be home soon. I even sang to her in the car. I remember wondering if I was annoying her more than comforting her because I’m a terrible singer.
        I miss her answering meows when I would talk to her. Her last few hours are hours I wish to forget. She looked nothing like my Laisy. She could barely hold her head up. People say you should remember the good memories, but it’s hard when those helpless eyes are engraved into your mind. She looked so lost. I should have seen she knew she was dying, I know animals can feel their death approaching and I always thought I would recognize it when it would happen.
        Well, I can say I didn’t.

        Coming home to their warm cuddling would make me the happiest person on earth. We can only dream of them at night and hope they’re happy, wherever they may be now.
        It’s very hard to move on. For me, Laisy was my child and I’m sure that Patch was yours. There’s an emptiness that can’t be filled. There’s a hole filled with loneliness that hadn’t been there before and it hurt so so much. But I don’t need to tell you that, do I?
        It’s funny how we keep repeating these things, knowing we both understand it so perfectly.

        Also, I’m positive people on here are getting annoyed by us if they have their notifications set up. If you want to keep talking, how about sending mails? You can mail me at:

  28. My boy, George was a puppy when I purchased him from my co-worker
    in June, almost 13 years ago. He had just been weaned, and I even met his parents.
    I named after a beloved patient of mine at the facility where I was employed. He was a healthy calm sweet little guy up until last year when the vet detected a heart murmur. They wanted to be do surgery, but because of his age, I didn’t want to be invasive. He gave me and my family so much happiness. I will miss him forever.

  29. My cat patch was put to sleep 26 June 2018 the vet said he had enlarged kidneys and he wasn’t eating up to that point he was absolutely fine he never had any health problems at all this was a total shock he was an indoor cat for 7 years he was with me every day and every night he was so intelligent and so placid never scratched or bit or hissed at anybody he was so full of love and fun he loved to run around and jump and roll I miss him so so much he meant the world to me my mom passed away Feb this year as well so I am totally alone in the house without my lovely cat miss you little one and love you so so much I cry every day I am heartbroken and devastated

    1. Hey, Chris
      I was wondering how you’re doing. My cat passed away yesterday and it hurts so much. It’s a wound that will probably take a long time to heal. Looking at her ashes and the fur they gave us before she was cremated, it begs me to clutch onto it and never let go.

      Have you considered getting another cat? Because I’m finding it hard trying to think of that and I want to know if it’s just because it’s been so recent.

      I hope you’re okay.
      Much love ♡

      1. Hi hayley thank you for replying I am in bits every day I cry every day I miss him so much he was such a loving happy cat and always wanted to be with me he was an indoor cat so we were together everyday and since my mom passed away it was just me and patch in the house it was just lovely to have him with me now I am alone I miss him I have his ashes as well I sit with him every night I can’t think of getting a different cat I am so much in grief

      2. So sorry to hear about your cat the pain of the loss hurts so much just not to be able to see them around the house or feed them or stroke them leaves you with such an empty feeling what was wrong with your cat

        1. The pain is like losing a close relative. You expect to feel something brushing against your leg or hear the contented purring, telling you you’re scratching the right spot.
          Having the ashes helps, but they’re not the same. I say “goodnight” and “goodmorning” every day when I go to sleep or wake up. I still talk to her.
          My cat, Laisy, had anemia. When we noticed she had trouble breathing, we rushed her to the vet. They told us she was dying and sure enough, she passed away the same day. I wish I had known sooner or at least had the chance to say goodbye.
          She used to hold my hand when I petted her. The crematorium gave us a paw print of her and I’m going to get a tattoo of it on my hand exactly where she used to hold me.

          Do you think you could ever get another cat? Because people here keep telling me to just get another one. It just doesn’t work like that. It’s too raw a wound right now.

        2. I would tell you the pain will go away in time, that life’s greed is just something we can’t control. But I know that the pain of losing something, someone, so dear is a scar etched into your soul. I also know that stating the obvious won’t help anyone either.
          I tried imagining Laisy to be still alive, waiting to be picked up somewhere. But the thought of her confused and alone just broke me further. So I tried accepting she isn’t around anymore. That hurts just as much.
          I fear it won’t get easier and that the very mention of her name will forever result in me tearing up.
          I miss her soft fur, her yellow eyes and her stubborn tongue licking my hand for almost half an hour nonstop.

          May I ask, how did Patch look like? What colour(s) did he have?

          PS, I just realized I asked the same question twice. About getting another cat, but the second time I am more referring to ‘ever’ as in… idk, a couple of years from now.

          1. Thanks for replying hayley so sorry to hear laisy had anemia you are right it is like a scar etched on your soul that’s nice that she held your hand when you petted her my little patch used to lick my hand when I scratched his back one of his favorite spots to be scratched he was black and white with a distinctive little diamond black shape on his nose it was such a shock from being diagnosed with enlarged kidneys on the Tuesday to being put to sleep the next Tuesday because in the 11 years he has been with me and he has been an indoor cat for 7 years he never had any health problems at all he was always running about and rolling and jumping he just loved to be with me like you say knowing they aren’t here anymore really hurts I have patch’s ashes as well but every day I say I can’t believe I have his ashes instead of patch with me I do the same as you and talk to him the feeling is the same as losing a relative its nice you have her paw print and a nice legacy to have the tattoo I have an ink paw print and some fur but I wish he was here I wish that moment in time from the past was different and they could still be with us for lots more years to come they give so much love what colour markings was laisy to me no other cat would come close to patch for me so I can’t think about a different cat I am lonely without him but it will take a long time because I love him so much same as you with laisy

          2. Hi hayley just thought I would say I wish we never had to say goodbye to our lovely cats I wish we were coming home to say hello to them and to feed them then settle down with them on our laps its losing that lovely warm feeling of a cats unconditional love and friendship and just being with them in the house so lonely without patch

        3. Your last reply isn’t showing me the option to answer, so I’m writing from another reply which does have the missing button.

          You know, that’s what makes you feel empty and alone. There’s nothing running about, meowing for food or rubbing against you. There’s just the remaining expectation of a furry body walking by or somehow ending up on your lap.
          I still feel her jumping on my bed, but it’s the phantom feeling of something long passed. It hurts to think of her and I’m sure Patch’s memories, be they good or bad, are just as painful to recall. It makes you realize what is gone.
          I find myself looking at her favourite spot, wishing I could feel her soft fur one more time. I want to hear her purring. I want her to sit on my spot while I have to find somewhere else to sit because her lazy ass refuses to budge.

          Laisy was completely grey. She was a British Shorthair deemed incongruous in comparison to the other cats her previous owner owned. She sold her to me and before I was aware of what was happening, Laisy had stolen my heart. And now she took it with her.
          Love hurts when it’s ripped away in an instant, separated by death. Not even the simple notion or the promise of being able to see her again some day appeases my bleeding heart.

          What was Patch’s eye colour? Because that’s what I miss seeing a lot; Laisy’s big yellow eyes staring up at me.

          1. Hi again hayley sorry to vent again but I am feeling so horrible in my heart having to have little patch put to sleep it hurts without him every day and every day is devastating but some days are even harder to get through without him I know you feel the same about laisy

  30. my baby gir kim was Born on 12/2/2003 pass away on 14/8/2018 I can’t stop crying How Have my Other dog Ralphy misses kim to which makes it worse He’s looking for kim All the time not the First dog my boy Laddie pass away in 2004 He was 14 years old Just before Kim’s first birthday But I don’t know why this time it seems worse. ralphy is 8 years old now e don’t pine to death for kim

  31. My beautiful Purl. An exotic shorthair cat was diagnosed with Polycystic kidney disease last November and sadly I had to have her put to sleep 4 weeks ago. We adopted Purl from a cats protection centre 4 years ago. She was an indoor cat and consequently became so humanized as she was with us all the time. Such a gentle natured puss who never scammed or got angry. She was like my baby and just looking at her would make me feel so happy and proud she was mine.
    I cannot stop crying. I see her face on my mob phone every time I open it and I have to kiss the photo. I am 67. I have had cats all my life. My previous cat prudence died age 21. All my cats have been loved and spoiled. But Purl was so special. I feel such loss.
    I now have adopted Peggy who is a very overweight 8 year old female hottie. She is not Purl but I will give her the same love I have given all my cats. Just don’t know how to grieve. I have my Purls ashes but can’t come to terms of her not being with me.

  32. We had to put our beautiful 10 yr old Rottie , Bleau to sleep 4 weeks ago. It has totally devastated me. He had growths in his legs that made it hard for him to walk. The worst part was when the Vet told us he had a strong heart and mind. His legs stole his quality of life. We don’t have children and Bleau was my soul mate. I cry a lot to the point where I sob and just can’t cope. Today I planned to walk along the beach to try and clear my head. The thought of not having him by my side it just too much to cope with. I can’t stop crying it’s like my heart hurts so much. Life is just so unfair. The empty feeling is like nothing I have felt before. People say it gets easier but I find that hard to imagined x I miss you Bleau so much xxx

  33. I had my 14 year old black beautiful Labrador girl “jet” put to sleep yesterday, I am devastated beyond belief. I feel as if I missed something and didn’t do enough even though she had been in and out the vets all week but still wouldn’t eat and her liver enzymes were high. She did have arthritis which made walking a struggle but I had her on all the medication the vets recommend and they have been really good with her. People keep saying it was her time and she was old but I still have this overpowering guilt feeling that is tearing my heart out, I love her more than anything else in my life and don’t know how to face the future without her. Does this feeling ever subside ? Do people always feel guilty having put their beloved pet to sleep? I just want to hold her and talk to her again but know it will never happen, this feeling is the worst I’ve ever felt.

    1. My heart goes out to you,I lost my best dog ever Jake he was a 13 year old Staffy but only looked about 6.He had stomach cancer and the vet told me to let him go and put my dog first but I felt so guilty putting him to sleep I just kept thinking I hope he doesn’t think I’ve let him down.I hate my life without him but have Missy Jakes soul mate also a Staffy but she’s 15 and I just dread thinking I’ve got to lose her soon aswell.I prey to god please let her stay until she’s 18 as I feel without her leaving me dogless for the first time ever it would kill me aswell.

  34. I just lost my baby boy, Charlie. We rescued him 5 years ago and since that time, he’s had numerous health problems, all which he recovered from. His health took a turn last week and we thought that he would bounce back as usual. But last night my husband and I spent the night on the floor with him as he struggled to breathe and rushed him to our vet this morning, he was gone within an hour. This is the worst pain that I’ve felt since my dad died. I know that it will get better, it just doesn’t seem like it right now. I’m waiting in the car to pick up my son from school and he doesn’t know that his puppy brother is gone. We will always love our Charlie Bear.

    1. I lost my 9 year old baby today, and it is probably one of the hardest things I’ve gone through. I don’t know how to cope with this, I’m just so heartbroken that I won’t have a little fur ball trying to get on my bed every night, or a little fur ball nudging me to continue petting her. This feeling is horrible, i hate feeling like i could’ve helped her but i was too late, i hate knowing that i won’t have my baby by my side anymore and i hate knowing that she’s actually gone which hurts the most.

  35. Today I lost my 4 month lab puppy to liver failure and I was there at the vet in his last moments. His temperature has gotten so down that nothing could get it back to normal. He waited for me till I arrived, even though he was unconscious but when he heard my voice he moved his mouth and eyes and after he knew I was there that’s when he breathed his last. I can’t get that sight out of my head and I miss him so much already. Day before today he had his LFT and he seemed to be getting better but today suddenly I got a call from the vet about his critical condition. I can’t stop crying and I don’t know what to do I feel the my world is coming crashing down. I love him so much. Even few months earlier I lost another lab puppy who was 3 months old to destemper but I tried again and had another puppy but now he died too. I don’t know what is it that I’m doing wrong as long as I remember even if I noticed a slight problem I took him straight to the vet but even then he died and now I feel absolutely terrible

    1. I’m not sure if losing a dog you’ve loved for years or losing a dog that has just only begun to live is worse. All I know is I cry every day for my Ruby, who died at just over a year old. I can understand how you feel. It’s devastating. I’m so very sorry for your two tragic losses. I’m sure at least they knew they were loved???

  36. Our sweet boy Leroy passed away yesterday after just 2 years, 4 months of enriching our lives. Leroy was in some pain for the past few days and woke yesterday with breathing trouble. After X-rays it was found he had a tumour and fluid in his chest. Our vet attempted to make him comfortable by removing fluid so that he could travel to see a specialist, but the fluid removal caused a heart attack and he could not be saved.
    My wife, son and I are devastated beyond belief.
    Leroy was something special to each of us – and with each of us in a different and special way. He spent early mornings with my wife while she drank coffee…..laying with her and nibbling a rawhide chew. He would cuddle with my son for an hour after we left for work. And he would shoot me a hopeful look after dinner….when it was time for his daily 45 minute walk around the nearby nature trail.
    Summarizing his life pains me, as he was such a dominant and positive force in our lives.
    Leroy was the most handsome little boston terrier I ever saw, and his beauty in how he touched and nourished our lives will never be forgotten.
    We are crushed – but thankful for the loving care he gave and received from our family.
    Leroy never asked us if we would love him…..he only asked that he be allowed to love us.

    1. So sorry for your sad loss I lost my Staffy Jake four months ago and I know it’s hard it leaves a big hole in your life but you’ll never forget them and time will heal things but my heart goes out to you.

  37. My 11 year old yorkie just died..i took her to emergency because she lost control of her bladder, and had a cough..three days prior was the 4th and my neighbor had fireworks for 4 days…she was really upset..i took her to her vet, and they gave her Ace..i later looked it up, and it said it should not be given to dogs…at the hospital they did blood and an x-ray…told me she had pancreatitis and started flooding her with fluids…a few hours later she went into respiratory distress..they stopped the fluid, and gave her Lasix..i told them no tubes , yet they put one in and she laid there 7 hours until she died…I knew none of this, no one called me..i called ,and they said oh she stopped breathing…I am angry, I should have been called, I promised her she would never die alone..looking at the records they did nothing the last few hours…I have so many questions, I feel guility…they also gave her more ace plus many other drugs..they can’t tell me what she died from..she did have a partially collapsed trachea..4 days now, I sob, and literally scream…she was my life for 11 years…I feel she
    suffered the last few hours and I am so angry..i don’t see getting over this..

    1. Debi-Nikita Rentzke

      Oh Brenda.. my heart breaks for you. You need to go back and ask more questions. They seem to be sweeping things under the rug.
      My baby girl died 3 weeks on the 8th October 2018.she had Lymphoma Cancer. She was only 3 years old. I feel guilt, sorrow and anger at how I couldn’t save her.
      I write to her everyday and tell her how much I love and miss her. It’s hard, and I cry every night thinking of her.
      But writing to her and sharing posts and telling her about my day seems to make it a lot easier as it makes me feel closer to her.. I hope that with time, our pain in looking our furbabies won’t hurt so much.
      Hold her tight in your dreams..

  38. I lost my beloved shepard X husky on Friday, he was 12 and it was time but it was so hard, I’m devastated, I’ll never get another dog like him, he was that one in a lifetime kind of dog that you might get once if you’re lucky, I named him Shadow and he lived up to his name, following me everywhere. I’m happy he’s no longer in pain but I feel like I’m never going to get over the loss of him, I love him so much and I know he loved me just as much, life will never be the same :(

  39. I just lost my companion of twelve and a half years. We did everything together, where I was she was. I feel so sad and heartbroken. Everything I do, or go,or look at makes me feel so lonely. I have many pictures and videos that have at least left me with some memories. I feel so sad. My wife is also grieving our perfect little girl.

  40. I just lost my beloved Tweety after over 17 years of companionship! She was/is my soulmate n I’m struggling to get over her passing. As though a piece of my heart just chipped off …it’s a deep pain of remembrance and loss! I’m inconsolable but constantly telling myself that she gave me her all for this long and like every other mortal being, left to go over the rainbow bridge. Only if I knew how she is n had a chance to give her just one more hug -I’ll feel blessed! Don’t know if I’ll ever be the same person, ever again!

  41. I lost my 14 year old Labrador Max today. He died in my arms in the vets office. He was diabetic blind arthritic and had a cancer. People had said I should do the deed earlier but I used the rule of thumb if he was people he would not be euthanized. For the last four months I slept on the floor next to him. I am broken and devastated, but I still feel no guilt at keeping him alive, I knew him and I knew he wanted to stay with me as long as he could and he did. I have no idea how I will go on but at least it will be without recriminations. Only you know your animal and don’t be told when it is time.

  42. We lost our 4 year old springer, Ginny on Friday. After battling with IPT and having to take daily steroids, she contracted a bug. As her immune system was weak due to her blood disease, this caused her the bug to make her severely ill and she went into kidney failure and had a cardiac arrest which she couldn’t be saved from. My partner and I were away at the time but were told the day after we left as my parents felt it was wrong to keep it from us. We had a busy weekend and didn’t have much time to think about it but being home now I can’t stop crying and thinking of how frightened she must’ve been not having anyone she knew around her. My heart hurts so much because it was so sudden and unexpected and we thought she’d be around for many years to come. I can’t stop thinking of her and keep randomly crying when I think of her not being in my life any more. She was like my baby and feels like I’ve lost a family member. Can’t picture my life without her. We chose her and she’s left us way too soon. It’s so unfair ?

    1. I am sorry for your loss. I lost my cat of 5 years last . I feel as if all the joy is gone and i live in a black hole. Work keeps me going until i come home. He was always there to make me feel i was the greatest. I am so lonely without him. We found him under a bush in our yard when he was just a few weeks old. I always said he was my gift from God. His heart failed after fighting urinary disease. I just cry all the time p

  43. My beautiful boy was put to sleep last week due to hemangiosarcoma, an awful, typically fatal cancer. I was in total denial that it was terminal and he lived a further 8 months post diagnosis, because I was in such denial the day when his tumor ruptured was terrible and he cried all night. His body was literally coming out and I had to do the best thing for him.
    I’m totally broken, he was the love of my life, we did everything together. I miss the snuggles, the kisses even just him being in the house and hearing his paws pattering behind me. I have cried every day since his diagnosis and I just feel like I’ve been sucked up by a black void of emptiness without him around. I don’t know if I’ll ever feel happiness again.

    1. You will, but it’s a different type of happiness. You will always feel half of your heart is missing, and that’s ok. After 11 weeks, I miss my boy the same as I missed him in the first week. The pain doesn’t change, but you become more resilient to it. It becomes a part of you. Don’t isolate yourself, talk with people that understand this kind of loss. Sending you hugs and letting you know you are not alone in this.

    2. I just lost my 10 year old German Shepherd Roxy to the same awful disease. I took her to the vets with a number of small symptoms yesterday morning and she was diagnosed after tests. A very large tumour had ruptured and there was no way to operate. She never came home as the vet (with a second opinion) said it wasn’t in her best interests and she’d be in a lot of pain. I was there with her until the end when she lay her head on me while I said my goodbyes and how much I loved her. I don’t think I can get over the suddenness of it all as she really was my ‘once in a lifetime’ perfect dog. I am helpless today and can’t get over her not being by my side. My other dog Cassie is slightly older than Roxy was and can’t understand where her sister has gone. It’s truly terrible.

  44. I had to put my sixteen year old Chiweenie to sleep this morning with my kindly vet and I don’t know how I will ever get over this loss. Sugar Cookie was four when I adopted her from a local rescue and I was honored to have her devotion and companionship for twelve additional years. She saw me through the most difficult time of my life and we were joined at the hip. Having retired three years ago, we bonded even closer as I could hang with her all day long and enjoy how loved she made me feel. I imagined I might feel some relief at her passing due to the special care she required the past year in particular, but instead, I feel as though someone keeps socking me in the gut with the pain of her not being in my house and making it my home. I never felt so loved just for myself like I did with Sugar. She followed me all day long and when she couldn’t jump up on my bed and then couldn’t jump up on the footstools to access my bed, I just picked her up and put her down. For twelve of her sixteen years Cookie slept against me every night, bringing me warmth and comfort. I miss everything about her–how she’d scratch (even) to get into the bathroom when I was there; how she’d pop her head up from the bed to see where I was going; how she’d just amble along from room to room with me and LOVE her two meal times. Gosh, I don’t know why exactly, but she is the hardest death for me. She saved me from loneliness. She made me feel I was so important, and always, always trusted and loved me with all her heart. When she passed on, all I could think was “save a place for me” as I can’t imagine not having our souls and hearts together again. Sugar, I love you so. Forever and ever. Thank you for love and devotion. Help me heal from missing you so.

    1. Mary I understand. I just lost my best boy George 4 days ago, and he was 12 and a half. My entire family is devastated. My heart goes out to you. You are not alone.

  45. I feel empty, lost, and completely broken inside. My little 6 year old Jack Russell had to be put to sleep yesterday afternoon after suffering from organ failure after eating poison from a walk in the woods. All in the space of two hours. I feel sick. I’ve been through a lot at my age but have never lost a pet until now, and it is the most gut wrenching, heavy hearted experience I’ve ever been through. He was such caring dog and didn’t deserve this. He is all I can think about at the moment, it feels like my head weighs 100 tonnes trying to lift it off the pillow in the morning to continue with my normal day. I loved him like a brother and just wish I could go back in time. I hope this feeling im experiencing doesn’t last too long. It feels like it’ll last a lifetime.

    1. Hey Harvey, I share your grief. I lost my best friend & companion lily an 8 year old Jack Russell on 17/3/18 due to intestinal cancer. A short but traumatic illness. I’m really struggling with the loss. She was an amazing dog, I expected her to be by my side for the next ten years. I’m angry & so sad that she only got to live half her life & that I only got to share 8 years.
      I’ve lost family members but never felt this grief stricken before. Just to know someone feels the same way is comforting

  46. I’m totally broken my Pomeranian Cassie, had to be put to sleep yesterday, only 5and a half years old. she became poorly and taken to the vet. When there she deteriorated quickly as they raced against the clock with texting to find out what it was. I hoped that it was caused by something they could help her with and still have a good life after. It was acute Leukaemia her organs were failing and she was already suffering. I had to let her go. Everything I do at home I expect her to be there then realise she is not, all I am doing is crying, cannot bare to touch anything of hers yet. its unbearable I miss her so much, Cassie was the best personality ever, beautiful little thing. I don’t know how I am going to function. I feel terrible I stayed with her as she went to make sure she has familiar voices and that I was there that she could smell me and feel me etc.. I am so empty right now and cannot see how I will get past this at the moment. I want to feel better and at the same time she utterly deserves my grief.

    1. Take your time to grief. There is nowhere to escape the pain, the only thing you can do is surrender to it. Cry when you feel like, don’t feel guilty when you can’t cry anymore – those are “numb days” when the mind closes to protect your body from the emotional pain, it’s a defensive mechanism, take advantage of it and try to do the things you once liked. Then, when the pain return (and it will, it always does), surrender to it again. One day at a time. I’m so sorry for your loss, know that you are not alone in this.

  47. My beloved Jack Russell Terrier has cancer she won’t be with us for long I’m gonna miss her so much she was my best friend and my everything she was my protection she was there for me when I needed her now it’s time to spend time with you and love you more until the day comes that we will see each other again until then know that I loved you more than anything

  48. I’m devastated I had to have my Staffordshire Bull Terrier Jake put to sleep yesterday my heart is completely broken he was my life after losing my wife.He had stomach cancer and the vet told me to let him go it the kind thing to do.I cuddled and kissed him for 20 minutes it killed me letting him go he was almost 13 but looked about 6 he was so fit and this was the first time he’d been ill.I could just end my life but I have another Staffy called Missy but she’s 15 this year so I’m panicking she lasts a few more years.Losing Jake has hurt me as much as Losing my wife but he was my last link to her.I was in the kitchen last night and took the foil top off my yoghurt and held it for Jake to lick he loved licking the yoghurt off it but he wasn’t there and it ripped me in two I can’t stop crying.I sorted his private cremation today with a rosewood urn with gold paw prints for his ashes.I feel numb my home is no longer a home he’s left a massive hole in my life.Im disabled so can’t work so spent every minute and day with him.God bless you Jake run free I’ll see soon one day xxxxxxx

    1. I’m so sorry. It’s going to be a painful road for you now. It’s been six weeks for me now and the pain is still unbearable. There’s nowhere to escape the pain, you just have to feel it. I am really sorry….You are not alone in this. There are so many of us here that lost our MIRACLES…I just hope we’ll get to see them again one day.

    2. christine nightingale

      Shaun reading your post upset me so much as I too used to take the lid off the yoghurt pot and give it to my beautiful Lab Lucy to lick and then the pot. I lost Lucy just over a year ago to liver cancer and I have to say my life has not been the same since. I miss her dearly. I was always aware of how much I loved her but when I had to let her go the pain was unbearable and although I have lost my parents, brother and many friends the grief I have suffered over losing Lucy just does not compare. It is all very raw for you and there is nothing anyone can say that will take your pain away but it will get easier Shaun, not now but over time it will but they will always be in our hearts forever. take care of yourself

    3. I get it! My Multi-poo, Otto Mathew, will be gone 1 yr New Years Eve 2019. I had to put him down also. My heart still breaks with him being gone. He was my sweet boy. I have 5 more dogs and a cat to let go of when it is their time. I also lost my cats to Heaven. I have to keep telling myself that they where here for me to take good care of them and love them to pieces which I did and do. I will always care for animals because there are more out there to be cared for. Sorry for your loses, you’ve been through a lot. Bless you and one day at a time and remember the love!

  49. On Friday Alfie Beagle played with his ball on Saturday he was gone within 15 hours of starting to be poorly we had said our goodbyes and let him go, I am beside myself with grief and cannot imagine him not being round me,I am struggling to use my kitchen as he was constantly round my ankles. I love my family so much but I have never felt the love I had for him and cannot imagine ever loving like that again
    Rip Alfie Finch things will never be the same god bless xxxxxxxx

  50. Our three year old English Mastiff choked on a treat on Sunday and died, I cannot express how devasted I feel, he had on going health issues from 6 months. Hip dysplacia, cruciate knee damage, eye sight problems but we loved him so dearly and feel we let him down because we did not know what to do, he died on the way to the Vets. On Saturday he went to water hydrotherapy but was not well this continued into Sunday, we gave him the treat and now he’s dead, feel so responsible for his death.

    1. My dog just died today in my arms, Our 1 and a half year old french mastiff named Puwa ( meaning RED) wandered off from our home. when we realized he was gone we drove out and looked for him. when we spotted him, we were in a quiet residential road. he was on the opposite side of the street. Out of excitement and relief that we found him I called his name to which he immediately turned his head towards us and instinctively ran to us. At exactly the same time, a car came right when he ran across the street and got him dead on… i was CRUSHed!! we quickly pick him up and he died in my arms. I blame myself for his accident. i could have just drove around to where he was at and retrieved him safely… i miss him so badly… he was my first pet in a long time since i lost my first one 40 yrs ago… Miss you Puwa…

  51. How am I coping? Well I’m not as it happens, am totally heartbroken and can’t stop crying, it’s 2 weeks today since my beloved Westie was put to sleep. I feel like I’m going mad .

    1. Ellen, I hope that a few weeks on from your post that you are feeling better. I lost my beautiful amazing best friend & companion to stomach cancer 2 weeks ago. Lily was an 8 year old jack Russell & your message just sums up my total heartbreak at the moment. Feels like it will never get better. I just hope it does X

  52. I live in a very rural area with few neighbors or friends my age. As a result, I often travel to the city on weekends. My first dog, Teton, was two year old I adopted to help with the loneliness. Because my house is small and I am surrounded by farmland, I decided he would be an outdoor dog. One day in April, he vanished. He would not have run away, as he followed me everywhere, so I must assume he is dead. After months of dreaming he would come back to me, I decided it was time to adopt another dog. In August, I brought home 2-month-old Matema. Because of what happened to Teton, i decided she would be an indoor dog let outside only with my supervision. This weekend, I travelled to the city, and left food for her with my neighbor. I came home today to learn that Matema had run outside and since most dogs here roam freely, my neighbor was not concerned. He later found her body; she had been attacked and killed by a snake. I can’t stop crying. I blame myself for adopting her knowing the dangers of my environment, and I can’t stop thinking of what her last moments must have been like. I’m heartbroken that I will never see my sweet Matema again, and I still sometimes have dreams about Teton.

  53. I got a pup of 5 days old who lost his Mother and I was his mother after that I took care of him and yesterday he turned into 21 days but suddenly because of my you ger brothers lill mistake of not handling properly my dog died in 1 min in my lap …That was the worst moment of my life and I am trying since last day please tell me what to do how to overcome how to forget that motherly feeling that care,love and affection plz tell me plzzzzz

  54. We had to put our staffie Charlie down on Monday, she was going to be 12 next month. she had an operation six weeks ago to remove a mammory lump and then two weeks ago lots of lumps started forming again and they literally went from pea sized to large oranges, she lost interest in food(even the nice treats) but I feel like I made the decision to let her go to quick. The vet said there was a 5% chance it was an infection, was that just to try give me some hope? I know I didn’t want her to suffer but I’m struggling with her not being here. She was my baby and everywhere I went in the house she was right there behind me. I just feel empty and miss her so much.

    1. christine nightingale

      You did the right thing for Charlie you loved him and was not going to let him suffer. Its heartwrenching when we have to say goodbye, I know I had to make that decision 7 months ago when my beautiful Lab Lucy was diagnosed with liver cancer. Miss her every single moment of the day. It does get easier but for me personally, the first 3 months was absolutely horrendous so much that I hated putting the key in the door knowing Lucy was not there to greet me. It does get easier but can take a long time.

  55. My puppy which is a Maltipoo was 8 weeks old when my wife and I bought her. We named her Mini. She was shy and scared at first sight and didn’t want to leave her original owner. But surprisingly, she didn’t cry when we took her home. She was very playful, small and cute.
    Yesterday night was a nightmare because she got into an accident. She was in the living room while my wife was cooking and I was doing my homework. My brother then came a played with her for a bit and then walked to his room. She then followed him but got stepped or kicked by my other brother whom was jogging back and forth in a small hallway. The sound of her cry tells me she was in deep pain.
    My wife and I decided to stop doing what we were doing to take her to a 24 hour vet and it hurts to see her in that condition just because she wanted to play. Being at the vet for 1-3 hours, we were told her left ribs were broken and there were fluids in her chest area. It could be blood or numerous things. They said she can die and will have to seek professional help but it’s only a small chance. But the problem is, the money was out of our budget. It hurts so much to do this but my wife decided to tell them to put her down and this is where the crying begins. They let us in to see her one last time and there she was, breathing heavily and fast with the support of their oxygen tank. Her cute face and her eyes opened made it seem like we shouldn’t loose hope on her. The playful Mini we knew was in pain. And I knew she would be happy if we got her into a better place.
    Our Mini is now gone and I regretted taking her the first time I’ve seen her. She would’ve had a better place. We only had her for 6 days and there were so many plans we had for her. She was like my little girl. I should’ve kept her in my room and this wouldn’t have happened . :( I’m going to miss her staring at me, licking my face and driving with her on my lap.

    I’m sorry Mini, Rest In Peace

    1. christine nightingale

      6 Days and pup is already dead? Yes, it would have definitely been better off with someone who would have given it the care and attention. It must have been a really hard kick in the ribs to cause that much damage. Maybe your kid booted that poor pup deliberately and wont own up to it. Shocking poor little pup I would have put the son down

  56. It’s been two months since we lost our precious , beautiful, loving 13 year old black lab. He was the love of our lives and we are now heading into the year of ” firsts”. We have no guilt about his death as he had details many issues that accumulated in the last year of his life that it was his time: the final straw was him tripping constantly due to arthritis.. his last trip was unrecoverable. His vet whom he loved dearly dropped everything to come to our home and give him his peaceful exit. He was so happy to see her , was relaxed and gave us a nod tha it was ok .. I truly think he knew and let us know it was ok. He was relaxed , happy and surrounded with love. It was a truly beautiful ending . We gave him the best life possible and gave him the best ending possible.. no regrets. However, he was so wonderful that his presence has left a horrible hole in our lives. The grief is palpable and I find myself crying more in the second. I think than in the first ( minus the first two weeks of wailing inconsolably) . I was hoping to be further beyond the grief by now.. and it’s dangerous because I’m tempted to grab the next dog I see , just to soothe. Not the best idea but how can I get over this ??

    1. christine nightingale

      Chrissy reading your comment has really choked me up as I have experienced what you are going through. I had to let my beautiful, loving 11-year-old black Lab Lucy go on the 1st April due to her having liver cancer. My whole world fell apart that is no exaggeration. I could not have asked for a more loving, sweet-natured dog, Lucy was just so perfect. My whole life revolved around her and from the moment I clapped my eyes on her when she was a puppy I valued every moment with her. The first 12 weeks after saying goodbye, I could hardly get myself out of bed and I would cry a river every single day. I honestly thought to myself, I just don’t want to be here without her, I was totally lost without her being by my side. It has been 6 months now and yes, I still miss her so very much and I know I always will but I can sit and talk about her now, talk about the funny things she used to do and I can actually say I loved her and miss her so much without breaking into tears. So many people told me to go out and get another dog, even just a few weeks after losing Lucy they were saying that to me. The pain of losing Lucy was on the same par as when I lost my mum and I did not rush out to get another mum, so I was not going to rush out and get another dog. My heart has been broken because I have lost my beautiful, unique black Lab, my best friend and she cant be replaced and the pain would not have been easier with another dog in my home.I had to grief for my girl, I had to go through the awful pain, the sobbing alone in my bedroom and staring at the ceiling for hours on end, feeling numb with grief. She gave me so much for so little in return. She cheered me up if someone had upset me at work, if I felt rough she was there staring intently into my eyes, pawing me and I would feel instantly better. Every time we went out for a walk was like a real adventure to her and that used to make me laugh and feel warm inside. She gave just so much so its only right that I grief for her as you do for your beautiful Lab. It will get easier, I never thought it would be its 6 months now, sure, I still have a dull ache in my chest and there are moments in the day where I get caught out and have to give myself a minute but its easier than those first few months. Lucy is still on my mind and some days I can’t quite believe she has gone but of course she has. One thing I do know is that I will never, ever forget that she was the best friend I have ever had. In time, you will feel that same way. Good Luck

      1. I find comfort in your words, I hope the pain of losing my boy will lessen in time, because now after 6 weeks, is unbearable. He was my everything, my anchor. Mornings are horrible because the first thing I remember is that he’s not here with me anymore. I miss him so much it’s hard to breathe. Same as your dear Lucy, my boy also loved outside walks. I regret so much not taking him more often. I have a backyard and sometimes it was easier to let him go there. I also have a hard time going out myself. I used to force myself to go on walks with him just to make him happy. I try to be forgiving with myself because regrets are really hard to deal with, but if I had the chance to turn back time…I’d do so much different, I’d be a better mom for him.

      2. Christine, your comment to Chrissy just sums up the hell I am going through at the moment. I lost my beautiful amazing best friend lily to intestinal cancer 2 weeks ago. She was a Jack Russell and had only just turned 8. There is no going around grief, no going over it or under it. I know i can only go through it…one awful slow day at a time, just hoping & praying it will get easier. Not even able to bear the thought of another dog as the grief & the need for just lily is unbearable. I’m taking solace in the fact that I’m walking in the shoes of others X

  57. my baby boy Tuffy died 2 days ago very sudden. He was just the most joy I had ever experienced from a small dog, and I have had several in my 64 years. But the sudden death after the vet. said he only had a cold. Put Tuffy on meds. and sent him home after visit on Monday sept.28 2017 and thurs. morn in my arms he left me before emergency systems could get to my home. He woke at 5am with cough and again at 8am. Bye 8:15 and calling everyboby from dr to emgerncy firedept, he died at 8:45am help arrived at 9am. He had to die and I couldn’t save him as I had several times from several things. Can”t stop the pain I feel of sadness.Pam

  58. I just lost my beautiful boxer dog ruby, she was my world and my first child. We grew up together And matured together she was beautiful and strong. She was a constant source of happiness for me and got me through some really tough times. I still remember when I got to the breeders 8 years ago I had her sister in my arms but she jumped up on me and licked me and i knew she was the one and she had chose me, and we was inseparable ever since. I noticed she was slowing down and thought it was old age until her belly ballooned up and I found out it was a tumour that burst on her spleen they put her to sleep mid operation. Iam heart broken and can’t stop crying. Rest easy my darling until we meet again on one of our long walks in the woods x

    1. christine nightingale

      Alex H I have just read your comment and am sorry you have lost your best friend Ruby. There is nothing anyone can say that will take away your pain, you just have to go through that awful grieving process and it’s a lonely thing. I lost my beautiful Lab Lucy who was the best friend I ever had on the 1st April to liver cancer. We had been together for just over 11 years and I don’t need to describe the utter pain and heartbreak to you as I know that is probably what you are suffering now. I don’t have any words of comfort for you, I really don’t, but I will just say.I am sorry you have lost your girl. Take care Christine

    2. Hi Alex,
      I too lost my beloved Bubba. I had to put him to sleep last night and I’m beyond heart broken. He was my best friend of 13 years and like you it was love at first sight. I can’t stop crying and I can’t see past this feeling of emptiness and sadness.

    3. We lost our five year old boxer this past Friday oct 12 2018 took her to the vet on Thursday morning after I thought she was getting a uti and acting strange that wendsday night. The vet done labs on her and checked her and noticed her gums and ears were white no pink at all he done the labs and the CBC cam back at a 2.3 the vet wanted to put her on steroids and doxycycline and bring her back in Friday and re check the CBC and if it wasn’t any better we were going to go ahead with the blood transfusion. But before that was decided the vet wanted his colleague to come in and consult on her as well they were amazed at how well she looked still eating drinking wagging her little nub they wanted to do x rays of her spleen abdomen and chest to rule out cancer as soon as they got her off the x ray table she collapses they put her on o2 and do all the heroic efforts to save out big beautiful sweet gentle girl but she was gone. It has totally devastated me and my husband it’s been four days now and we still break down. We have two smaller dogs who are missing her very much also. The last lab came in yesterday and it confirmed she had a diagnosis of autoimmune hemolytic anemia. We had no dreaming idea our baby was so sick it took her fast.

      1. Christine Nightingale

        Deeply sorry for the loss of your beautiful Boxer, as I sadly found out myself, when my sweet Lab was diagnosed with liver cancer, I just could not believe it. The vet said animals always hide their illness so well that it is very difficult to pick up of their symptoms until it is very late on. A devastating and very difficult time for you both, dealing with the sudden shock, the loss and of course the emptiness. I was in your situation 18 months ago and for the first 3 months, I could hardly get myself out of bed. For me, as I lived just with Lucy it was very hard adjusting to life without her and just yesterday the sadness once again overwhelmed me.
        Our dogs are our family and we love them as much as any family member and people who have never had the love of a dog will never understand. So very sorry and as I have said it is a painful time for you as you are both grieving for your girl. She will always be in your hearts, always.

        1. Christine, thank you for your kind words, I am sorry you too are having a hard time also. Lucy must have been a special girl too.

        2. Do you have any advice on coping mechanisms? My 12yr German Shepherd is dying. I am beyond devestared and know the end is near. What can I do to ger through the pain? Currently I can’t eat or sleep or focus on work or even watch TV because my heart is so broken.

  59. I’m so sorry for your loss. There are no words to express the pain and grief of losing a pet. Pets really are our best friends, and our homes are never the same without them. The death of a pet is one of the most painful experiences because our dogs and cats are unconditionally loving, accepting, and so innocent!

    My heart goes out to you as you grieve and say goodbye after your pet’s death. No that your best friend isn’t in pain, and is truly resting in peace. Your souls and spirits will be forever intertwined, and you will meet again one day.

    Until then, may your heart heal and your spirit be renewed. May you find ways to let go of the pet you loved and lost, and may you even start thinking about opening your heart and home to another beloved best friend.

    In sympathy,

  60. Yesterday my best friend Misty died. I had no time to prepare it was sudden :( The vet said cancer and it was bad. My heart is broken, my baby, daughter best friend is gone. 10 years of her being with me, never left my side, slept in my bed, cuddled me :( Im broken. I dont know if I can get over this, Im so shocked and sad…oh so sad :(

  61. My dog was run over by a truck right before my eyes, he died shortly thereafter 4 days ago on Thursday 07/06/2017. His name was Micah a Pug/Pit Bull mix rescue I adopted when he was 4 years old and died at 7 years old. I called him my Ray of Sunshine, my perpetual optimist, my Fat Boy cause he’d eat anything and everything if you let him. He would let me carry him on my hip, sometimes it was the only way to calm him. I took him camping on the beach and let him off the leash to run at full speed and he did, he chased the birds. Took him on trips to the river, my mom thought it was a bit much that I bought him a $15 Beach Towel but what’s too much when they’re like your baby. I would go home for lunch just to make sure he went potty and spent some time outside without sitting in his kennel too long. Though he wasn’t kept in his kennel before until he started tearing up my mail, sometimes I’d take him to my parents house cause he wouldn’t tear anything up there, still close enough to work to go see him at lunch. I like Octopuses and the first toy I ever bought him was an Octopus it was the only toy he didn’t destroy. I buried him in my parents backyard in the same hour that he passed, I’m still in the first stages of grief denial/isolation, anger, bargaining and are occurring currently all at the same time. The denial comes in the way that I don’t want to put all his things away just yet, sometimes I can’t stand to look or touch them so I walk away and try not to think about it too much. The isolation is wanting to just go sit with him in the backyard and drink a beer or just be with people who don’t know what happened so that they don’t ask because I can’t talk about it without shoving it down and hiding the pain. In the place of anger is guilt because he was my responsibility and I feel like I let him down, I was shocked to pick him up off the street… too scared and in that moment I feel like I failed him, like I let him die alone. Bargaining by trying to throw myself into my life to fill the feeling of emptiness which isn’t easy when your daily routine including your lunch from work revolved around the consideration I had for my dog. I had thoughts that I didn’t want to be here anymore, I am not suicidal but I think it’s natural for it to cross my mind. I think it is therapeutic to share and write about this, seeing I am not alone in my grief is somehow comforting and knowing that I am not the only one who got a little dark or felt guilty. I thought right off of getting another dog because I didn’t want to go through this life by myself, I didn’t want to not have a little life that was always there for me, never faultered, never judged me, preferred me to anyone else. I loved my dog, love him still, always have and always will. RIP to all the lives lost including my babies, let their energies bask in the light and frequency of happiness. Thank you all for sharing.

  62. Seeing the pain of others does not lessen my own. Karma has been gone 9 days now, and for 9 days I have not slept well. I cry constantly. I look for her and she is not there. She is not in my bed. Not on the porch. Not on the lawn. Not rolling around on the floor with a stuffed baby in her mouth. She is gone. And I want to be with her. It’s been tough. Rough. Sad. Lonely. And still..I cry. And think dark thoughts. I am alone. My four legged yellow lab is not here with me. She was my companion dog, my service dog, my friend, my life. And now…I cannot eat. I cannot sleep. I cannot focus. My heart has withered and there is no joy left. I am old. So was she. But she got to go and I sent her on her way. Yet, I am still here and don’t want to be.

    I miss you Karma. This pain will never go away.

    1. Christine Nightingale

      Bren nothing anyone says or does for you will make it better. I felt exactly the same way as you are doing when I had to have my beautiful black Labrador Lucy put to sleep due to liver cancer. She had been the centre of my universe for the past 11 years and 3 months and I loved her more than anything or anyone on the planet and everyone knew that because she was always my topic of conversation. It is 3 months tomorrow that I said goodbye to my girl and despite the overwhelming grief and the river of tears I cried, it is just getting easier for me. I still miss, I will always miss her and she will always be in my heart. So, Bren, you will grief and be in pain for a while yet but over time it will get a little bit easier for you. Take care of yourself.

    2. I feel exactly as you , I am sorry for your loss,I lost my Lucy 6 yr old Yorkie, fluid on the brain due to infection, they did not find the problem till it was to late several EEG MRIs and 2 ultrasounds then last step took fluid from the base of her brain and found the inflammation, her little body was wore out from fighting and she was gone 2 hrs later she fought for 4 days, i am so empty and hate to come home or be there ,she was my baby, my best friend ,my everything,just taking the trash out she would greet me as if i were gone for a week,i know eventually it will get better but feel as though i may never get there sometime a question why God would allow us to go through times like this,I lost my son at 25 yrs old and this hurt’s just as bad,how can that be ,i have to keep busy and not be still ,she was my sunshine .
      Goodbye my Lucy ,

    3. Dear Bren,

      I have read all theses letters, but yours I have read 100 times. Did you make it? Did you survive? I feel I will not. It’s been 8 days. Katie and I were an “everything” pair for 13 years. I am sick to my stomach. I am lost. I’m hoping that you are somewhere smiling, not sobbing, able to eat and happy with memories of Karma. How long will it take?

  63. I lost my beloved Lucy 3 days ago one day before her birthday my Lucy was home i went to florida with just myson for a 4 day getaway my as he’s leaving to the marines june 19. So i know that’s going to be hard for me. But i had Lucy to. Help me. But she died now shes gone and i have no one she was my daughter im lost she took all my pain away she was special and i can’t do nothing to bring her backi find myself searching for a guarantee that i will see her again when im gone but the only way to know that is by dying myself im really lost my God help me

  64. My Jack Russell died yesterday she was thirteen I had her for 10 years I bought her from Leigh Cats and Dogs home when she was 3 years old. I’m missing her so much can’t stop crying I still have her bed dog food lead and collar in the house to remind me of her. I have a big picture of me her and my girlfriend on the wall I cry when I look at it. I didn’t go to work today too heartbroken I have never cried so much in my life I went to the park today to remind me of her and seeing other dogs made it upsetting I know it will take time I miss her so much

  65. My four weeks kitten died . We found her dead body today in the morning.She was brought on this Monday and found her dead body today Wednesday .Iam feeling very weak and heartbroken.Actually it was my fault.From this morning I can’t stop crying.Iam crying every second and minute. Iam missing her a lot as she died in three day from the day when she was brought .

  66. my family and I just put down my dog today, he was with me since I was born. My dog protected me, got me through hard times, and made me happier. I cried the days leading up to his death, and today I cried every second. I feel sick, weak, and heartbroken. How do I stop crying, and feeling like I lost half of my heart?

  67. I had to have my mini schnauzer Rez put to sleep June of 2015, he was 10 and he had stomach cancer and was rapidly going down hill. He was my buddy and we did pretty much everything together. He loved going for walks and going swimming. I miss him very much!

  68. My dog Brady was a beautiful Sheltie 35 lbs large for breed looked like a small Lassie,he was 7 when I had to put him down because of cancer.Im retired and literally spent every day with him. Aside from being beautiful to look at I have never had a more intellegent dog.We tried 3 kinds of chemo that lasted 3 months but to no availe. On April 7th 2017 we knew it was time, my heart is broken and I just can’t seem to stop crying. I just pray there is something else after this life so I can see my pal again, don’t think I will ever get over his death . RIP Brady, God bless you.

  69. My dog grorge passes away last week, he was ok 2 days before. I thought he had an esr infection as he kept shaking his head every now and again. Then he went down hill rapidly i took him to thr vets,he had a blood test and showed no problems. The vet gave him tablets i took him home. By this time he was weeing in thr house. And didnt know where he was i sat him on the settee next to me. After an hour he started to. Beath heavy did a stretch and died. Every day feel sick not knowing why ?

  70. 4 weeks ago I had to get the vet to my beautiful girl Betty. She was 15 years old and I’d got het from rescue when she was 18 months old. She was a black staffordshire bull terrier. i loved her so much. In January she stopped wanting to eat and didn’t want to walk so i took her to the vets and they gave her anti-inflamitory liquid, but it made her worst. Another vet gave her steroids and she picked up – wanting to eat and going on nice little walks. She was on these around 7 weeks and I knew she was on borrowed time. I used to tell her I loved her and didn’t want her to leave me.
    Then one Monday morning she took a turn for the worst. She was anaemic and wasn’t interested in anything – not even the vet when he came. We put her in her bed and I stroked her, told her I loved her and she was the best girl – then she slipped away as the needle went in.
    She went to a pain free world – she looked so beautiful asleep. I love her so much and everyday I cry for her. I miss her so much.
    I try to think about what a great life she had. Lots of walks on beaches, through woods and country side. Running in the sea. She could sleep on the bed, settee, wherever she wanted. She was so loved and I cared for. I will never forget my little girl. My heart is so heavy, I feel I am carrying her around with me. I love you Betty so much xxx

  71. I found and rescued an American Foxhound in Nashville as he sat along side a busy highway at 3 weeks old. If I had not pulled over, he would have been hit and killed for sure. Long story short, he was almost 15 years old and I had to put him down last night. I watched the vet give him the shot to make him relax and I lied on the ground in the room and told him how sorry I was and how much I loved him and thanked him for loving me unconditionally for so many years, even when I didn’t deserve it. When the vet came in to give him the second shot, I couldn’t bear to watch so I left balling my eyes out. I can’t stop crying and wish I would have stopped the vet. I’m lost without my best friend.

    1. I’m crying reading this because I felt the same way. As hard as the decision was for you, you did the right thing for him so he didn’t have to suffer. He runs free now. You will meet again. Hold him in your heart. I swear I still feel my little guy with me at times. I swear I heard his little whine about 3 days after he was gone. Like he was telling me he’s ok. You can say I’m crazy but my other dog heard it too. I know it’s hard savor happy thoughts of time you spent with him. You gave him a wonderful life. God bless.

    2. I feel the exact same way, I put my dog down at 16 1/2 a couple weeks ago and I’m in a very deep depression and just cry all the time. She was sick for about 5 days and she wouldn’t eat the vet said she had kidney failure and 50/50 change they kept her overnight on I’V’s so we gave it a try. I went up to visit her that night and she whined to come home and was so happy to see me, she has never had to stay overnight at the vet before. I prayed all night long and the vet called in the morning said it didn’t work and we need to put her down. I was so distraught not in my right mind I went to the vet they put Angel in my arms and I just told her how much I loved her and kissed her for about an hour then they came in a put her down n my arms. there was one shot then the next right away and she was gone in 2 seconds. I’m sick inside I didn’t ask enough questions, I should of got a second opinion this was not her usual vet, he could not see her until later in the afternoon and recommended this veterinary place and I wanted to get Angel in to be seen asap because she wouldn’t eat, they seemed nice and I don’t know why I didn’t question anything. Angel looked so sick and would not eat and was falling a little I’m just devastated there was no time to think, I wonder why didn’t I just take Angel and leave take her to her vet and see if he could do anything or let her die at home while we baby her. I didn’t want her to suffer, and now I’m so lost without her and I just wish I could take it back and take her to her vet to make sure there is nothing more we can do and that this is what we need to do for her. I’m very sorry for your loss, we love our pets so much they are so much of a part of our lives. I feel terribly lost without Angel, I just keep believing she is still with me and that is the only way I’m getting through this.

      1. Laura Hollenbacher

        I just put my little one down two days ago. I can hardly breath. It was a sudden illness over a weekend and I had to take her to an emergency clinic that wasn’t her normal vet. I felt like I didn’t have time to think or make the right decision. I’m second guessing everything. They said it was a stroke. She was unable to move her legs and her little head was cocked to one side with her little tongue hanging out. The stroke could have been caused by anything but the vet told me it she was suffering. I hate that word. I couldn’t stand the thought of her suffering. Everything I’ve since read has said she could have come back from s stroke. She was only 6 and healthy. I’ve had no issues with her. I didn’t want to come home from work tonight because that meant she wasn’t here. I’m devastated. I’m sorry for your loss of your dog. It’s the hardest thing I’ve dealt with in awhile. I hope your right that your dog is still with you. I believe that too. I have to. Laura

    3. I had to have my beautiful black Labrador Lucy put to sleep on the 1st April 2017 she was 11 years and 4 months young. Lucy went off of her food 2 weeks before she died. The vet said she had a mass on her liver that was cancer. I just could not believe it as I alway thought it would be her hind legs that would let her down in later years. Lucy was put on steriods and rallied around and appeared like her old self but when I thought about it after her death I became aware that she was not her old self at all. She didnt come and greet me when I came through the door, she didnt race to the door when the doorbell rang. 2 weeks later she became very unwell, violently sick 3 times and was panting so hard. I was so distressed at seeing Lucy this way. I rushed her to a vets and they said she had upset tummy, discomfort in her abdomen. I said she got liver cancer is it to do with this. He said no not necessary, he gave her a painkiller and anti sickness then took her back home. The following morning I went to her and she just lie on the floor and didnt even look up at me and I knew in the moment I would have to be brave for her and let you go, stop the suffering. We took her to the vet who said we can try this and try that but I said no, no more I need to let her go. I wont have her suffer and so I got down on the floor and stroked her and told her that I loved her so much and thanked her for all the love she has given to through the years and then she went to sleep. Lucy was my best friend! She was beautiful, sweet natured, trusting and loyal and I shall love and miss her always…………

  72. Dear Peter,

    I am so sorry for your loss – both of your pet Missy and of your wife. I don’t know why God allows us to love His creatures so much, and then He takes them away from us. It does seem to be unfair and even cruel to have to go through the heartbreak of losing a pet and a spouse that we love dearly. I don’t know why it has to be like this, and I wish death didn’t exist.

    What helps me is the memory of a Jewish celebration I went to, 20 years ago. We all sat around the table and took turns reading out of the Torah. The messages we read were about how life is so achingly beautiful sometimes, and how life is so devastatingly sad and heartbreaking other times. The idea was to teach us that life is bittersweet. It’s not all beauty and love, but it’s not all pain and suffering.

    To symbolize the fact that life is bittersweet, we ate two types of food. One was a sickeningly sweet morsel of something sugary, and the other was a terribly bitter morsel of something gross. On their own, each bite of food disgusting and inedible. But when you put them together, the flavors blend and the taste was delicious.

    That was a huge life lesson for me. I believe that life can’t be all sweetness, and it can’t be all bitterness. We need both the sweetness of love and the bitterness of death in order to fully be alive.

    I know this doesn’t answer your question of why God puts us through the death of our pets… It’s just something that helps me when I feel crushed by grief. I remember that our world – the world that God created for us – is heartbreakingly beautiful, full of majestic heights and deep dark valleys.

    I am so sorry for your loss, and that you’re coping with your pet’s death. May you find healing and hope, strength and courage. May you taste the sweetness of life again – even sooner than you expect.

    In sympathy,


  73. I’m sorry you lost Missy. Don’t blame yourself you were doing what was best for her. You didn’t know. I lost my little Chihuahua day after Christmas he couldn’t walk anymore and I too keep asking myself if I did the right thing but then I remember him falling on his face everytime he walked and how much it must hurt him. He had to pee laying on his belly. I know you wanted to be there with her and there are not any words I can say to take the pain. Imagine your loving wife is taking care of Missy. I’m so sorry for your loss.

  74. Daisy died one week ago today. My redbone coonhound, my best friend for 13 years. Daisy was with me in woods in the snow up north, for many years, and now retired, lay by my side in Florida. She lay there and licked my foot as I worked on the computer, greeted my with coonhound howls when I returned home. Words fail me. how much I love her. My heart is breaking with sadness. I can’t understand how I will ever get over her being not here. She was loved by everybody. They come down the street and say hi daisy. and she would give them a little howdy coonhound howl. She was loveable. I read that rainbow bridge poem, but I start crying. Only a week now. I hope the pain is
    diminished someday.

    1. I know how deep the pain is for you right now. I cried every day for weeks. The sharp pain will diminish with time. I lost my Oscar on Oct 1 st and I will continue to think about him and miss him every day. The pain will ease with time. I’m praying for all who have just lost their pets because I know how unbearable the first few weeks truly are. Hang in there!

  75. One week ago today my best girl Samantha passed away. She was being treated for Lymphoma for 7 months & it was under control. She was a sweet dog. A Jack Russell terrier who had had a long & wonderful life.
    You see, she was 19 years 6 months old. & 9 days.
    She was still very busy & curious but slower than in her youth. So smart & happy to see everyone. Gave everyone kisses. Trusted with babies & kids of all ages.
    She also had a moderate degree of renal failure for which I cooked special food for her & gave her SQ fluid daily for the last 7 months.
    I tried to tell myself to be prepared emotionally for years for the fact that she was very old & could go @ any time. But everyday she woke up breathing. & happy to eat like a horse.
    When the cancer showed up, she was so active, walking, jumping, playing & getting into mischief, that I felt she should have a shot. She did very well with very little side effects. Then the kidneys started failing.
    I kept reminding myself that I could do everything right & she would still die.
    The only thing that I wish is that I didn’t go to work last Monday. She passed within 30 seconds of my walking into the room. I had a camera on her that I could look @ her & take pics. I looked @ her 10 minutes before I got home & she was sleeping on her bed. When I walked in she was on the other side of her 6′ x 10′ pen. I had left her food in case she wanted to snack.
    She was lying down in front of the dish with her head down. I saw a big exhalation & that was it. She was gone. She had a string bean in her mouth & some of the food was gone.
    I’m thinking that she was feeling better so wanted to eat but she was just done.
    I feel so guilty that I wasn’t there. She had a wonderful life with a big happy family.
    I just miss her & just can’t stop crying.
    She was my baby & I miss her.

    1. I’m so sorry for your loss. I just lost my Sparky of 13 years a few days ago. I wanted you to know it sounds like Samantha lived a wonderful long life. She was waiting for you to come home before she left you. Wheat her it was a brief second or hours you were still there with her for that final breath that was a gift to you. She knew how much you loved her.

      1. I’m so sorry for your loss of Sparky. Thank you for commenting about Samantha, she was indeed very special & had a great life. I’m starting to remember some of the funny stuff she did.
        I hope that in your sadness you are able to remember all the great times you and Sparky had.

  76. Today i lost my 8 1/2 yr old boxer Buddy. he had cancer in his abdomen. We new it was time to put him down he started breathing heavy, and was barely able to walk. When we went to the vet to put him down my fiance was laying with him on the floor hugging him, and crying. Before the vet even got a chance to put him down, my dog looked up at my fiance because she was crying, and he passed away in her arms. he died naturally. Whenever my fiance was upset our dog use to hug her and look at her. She kept saying sorry as she was crying because she did not want to have to put him down. I just thought it was really special, because he died naturally protecting her again like he always did. We are going to miss him so much. Its so hard to lose a family member.

    1. Very hard to lose them. But he left in his own time. What a blessing for him. The heartache you feel I know is just unbearable right now. I’m glad you were holding him. I send prayers your way. ???
      His paw prints forever in your ❤️ ?

    2. I’m so sorry Ricky, just about a week ago I lost my 7 and a half year old English mastiff, snuggles. She was named that for his she loved to snuggle right up next to you. We had just picked her up from the kennel and her leg was cut. She had anxiety so she chews on her leg when she’s not home. So I didn’t think much of it. The next day she was unresponsive. It was 4:00 In the morning, and I needed to get my 140 pound mastiff into my car. I couldn’t do it. So I called the police but every station I called refused to help me. But then I put a later half into the car half out and drove her to the pet hospital. The man there said after some testing that she had lime sickness. And playlets that were clumping together. The next day the called and said it was much worse. They said she only had 10,000 playlets and she needs 400,000. I went to see her. They next day I was told she was moving around. I WAS SO HAPPY! I thought she was going to pull through. But at the end of the day I was told that her body gave up on fighting the infection, the infection was in her adamman. I was so sad. They told we she only had minutes left. I went to see her. One last time. Where she was euthanized. I miss her so much. She means the world to me. They told me she needed surgery but since she had no playlets she would die before the end of surgery. I miss her. I love her. I cry every day. I wish I had her back with me. That we could cuddle again.

      1. Im so sorry. Its been 5 days now since we lost our boy, and we are having the hardest time. I feel so lost without him, Ive never been so hurt.

  77. Had to euthanize my chihuahua 12/26/2016. He was 10 and couldn’t walk anymore without face planting every 6 inches. It had to hurt to fall all the time. His back legs would give out too. He peed outside laying on his belly. I did it for him. It is so hard I miss him so bad. I have to bury him today I brought him home where he belongs. Love and miss my Paco my heart is broken ??

  78. I had to have my nearly 13 year old golden retriever put to sleep yesterday. She was struggling to walk and would keep collapsing on some occasions. Obviously it still hurts and I cry when I’m alone.

    I still walk into a room expecting her to be there.

  79. In the early hours of this morning my beloved cat Delilah passed away in my arms. She wasn’t looking right yesterday morning so took her to the vet in the afternoon. He thought she had a heart condition and a blood clot so gave her some aspirin and pain relief. When we got home she didn’t even come out of the carrier. She continued to struggle to get up and stay standing throughout the night. At one point she was cold I brought her into bed with her cuddled against me. After that she started to struggle to breath and died in my arms. I hope that me cuddling her gave her some comfort, but it has btokeny heart that that will be my last memory of her. I have 3 other cats and they are all feeling the loss, but none of them like being cuddled like my Delilah. I’m struggling with guilt at the moment as I can’t recall seeing her the previous day although my partner seems to think he did and hope that she wasn’t struggling for that long. There is a great big hole in my heart and feel reduced to tears all the time. I dread going to bed in fear that it will bring memories flooding back.

  80. I lost my dog henry a couple of days ago and i just cant cope it feels like my heart is getting ripped out. I cant sleep i cant eat all i feel is guilt and angry at myself for the way he died. I really dont know what to do he was my best friend i loved him so much

    1. I’m so sorry for your loss Emma. I understand that feeling very much so. What I found helped me alot, was writing to my dog in a type of journal, telling him about my day and what I missed about him and what I hope he is doing now. Perhaps that may assist you in your time of need.

    2. My dog bounty passed away June 2, 2016 she had a seizure at 9pm and could never come out of it,I stayed by her side the whole night until a vet showed up the next day and had to help her along. She was the center of my world, she came first before my husband even.I wanted to go with her so bad, my husband or no one else really understands the heartbreak. I love snd miss her so much.all I do is cry and put her bandanas on my teddy bear.I would have jumped in front of a train to save her

      1. I so so sorry for your loss, i felt exactly the same way about libra , it helps to know tgere is someone out there feeling the same way. Hugs to you. had to put our dog libra (9 yrs old) to sleep suddenly on new years eve, she was the most beautiful gentle dachshund with such a loving soul.
        about 6 weeks prior she wasn’t well so we booked her in for bloods /scans & X rays, they found a blockage in her intestines which were small bone fragments, the vet said lucky they are small & gave us liquid paraffin to help her pass them. (To this day I will not & cannot ever forgive my husband for giving her a rib bone, I screamed at him not to!! & he still hasnt even said he was wrong) anyway a few days later we took libra back as she was in pain again and her anal glands needed to be emptied, once again she was ok for a few days, then we took her back & was told from all the trauma she’s been through she now has Pancreatitis & put on various meds one of which was METACAM, after back & forth to vets as she was up & down, I was then told to stop the METACAM as it’s caused an ulcer!! Only then did I do research into this awful drug. She was then given a pain injection, hydration injection into her back & tramodol for later that day ( being the morning of NYE)& told to call them later that day as she should show signs of improvement. The whole day I sat with my princess but I could see she was in pain so as advised I took her back in for what I had discussed with vet, she would have to be admitted & put on a drip. Which was absolutely heartbreaking but I would do anything for her. When the vet saw her her face dropped, libras temperature was so high she was in such pain from the ulcer & nothing was working , I almost passed out , I had to call my husband to come say goodbye to her & I sobbed as I gave her hugs goodbye. A part of me died that day ……& her soul mate Leo who has been with her since he was 8 weeks (now 6) is so lonely & depressed as we didn’t even say goodbye as I rushed out the door with her to the vets. I cry every day but know I must be strong for Leo. We have Libras ashes…but she shouldn’t have heart has been ripped out .

  81. I had to put our GSD, Rex, down today. He was only 7 years old, but he had possible cancer of the lungs and was weak and tired. I’ve cried so much I wonder if it’s possible to cry anymore. I have had him since he was a puppy and his personality has been something I will remember forever. I wonder if I did the right thing, but I know that he’s not in pain or short of breath. I’m sure that he has gone to the Rainbow Bridge and is waiting for my family and I to show up someday.

    I guess we all cope in different ways to our pets, rather our fur family members and what happens to them. They entrust their lives to us and we should ensure they never suffer.

  82. My cat miley was 1 & a half years old, she was such a friendly cat & also made me smile especially if I was feeling sad. She was funny, had loads of energy, yesterday I had to make the hardest decision of my life & have her put to sleep as she had been poisoned with anti freeze. It hurts so so much, it’s like I’ve lost my best friend, but the more I think about it she was more than just that, she was my girl my baby. I know people will think how could she be your baby she was a cat. But she was my baby. My partner would give her ham & she would take off with it to the corner of the room & sit & eat it & boy would she growl if our other cat would go near her. She loved getting tuna & if was worse with milk boy did she love her milk, every time you went to the fridge she was there at your heels meow wanting some milk.

    1. This is sad how cruel those who poisoned your cat. My cats too had been poisoned both died in consecutive days one is just around 6months old and the 2nd one that died was almost in his 4 yrs. that I had rescued he was abandoned. I had a emotional break down after their passing because it’s just so cruel I just lost my faith in humanity. I can’t sleep well because i kept thinking their agonizing pain it lingers in me I just can’t stop thinking how painful it is. They where my joy my love my almost everything now they’re gone just like that. I dunno how long will I mourn with their deaths I’m alone and no one to talk to so I’m just leaving this comment to offer condolences and just a way to release my anger and pain.

  83. I had to euthanize my shih Tzu Button 3 days ago. The vet gave me time to say goodbye and when I was holding him and telling him that I loved him he put his little head on my chest as if to say I love you too. He was with me every day all day long and spent a lot of time laying on my lap. He is the only pet dog I’ve ever had and l adored him. He liked to be with me all of the time and I felt the same. I held as he passed from life to death so he wasn’t alone. With all my heart I hope that I will see him again when I die. Just because he’s gone it doesn’t take away the love I had for him. I still love him more than anyone can imagine and if he’s gone to heaven somewhere I hope he still feels the love in my heart for him. I gave I’m a life full of love and at least I know that he had 11 years of my loving and holding and playing and cuddling and that makes me feel better. I just never wanted that love to stop. I’ll love him forever and I hope that he can still know and feel that love I have for him. I love you Button. x0x0x0

    1. Karen, we had to put down our beloved Boo Boo last Sunday, l can’t stop crying. Boo was almost 14, we adopted her when she was 5 wks old. Boo was loyal, protective & very stubborn, she was a mix breed of lab/chow. I feel paralyzed with grief, l miss our baby girl so much. I am sorry for your loss & understand the pain you’re going through.

    2. Carolyn & Karen, I feel both your pain. I had my sweet angel Brady from 8 weeks to just shy of 14 years 9 months. I had to make that horrible decision almost 3 weeks ago due to cancer taking away all his quality of life. The pain 3 weeks later is actually stronger than it was the day I had to do it and that was bad enough. I’m not sure how to move forward without him actually; he was with me all the time, slept with me, I rarely/if ever traveled and when I did I drove long distances just so he could come along. I know I gave him a good life and I wasn’t read to see it end. I told him to promise me to live forever but that didn’t happen. I can’t wait to see him again. He is loved forever just as your sweet angels are. I understand your pain. I love you Brady! XO

  84. I lost my best friend of 14 years yesterday. My chihuahua, Skittles, randomly started breathing awkwardly Monday night/Tuesday morning. I just thought she was hot maybe or nauseous. Her stomach acted up sometimes and I would have to give her medicine. She slept with me the whole night and my father was going to let her out but she wouldn’t get out of my bed.I remember waking up and going in the kitchento make something to eat and she was laying in the next room, sleeping on her spot on the couch. I noticed her acting as if she didn’t feel well but kept an eye on her.. Finally I decided she needed to go to the vet. She was struggling so hard to breathe. I was in a panic.. I put her into the car and just told her everything was going to be ok. I sped to the vets office and he told me she has poor circulation and fluid in her lungs. He tells me she might die. I kept it together so well. I told him to do anything he could. I left because I was so upset I didn’t know what to do. All i remember is her looking at me before I went and comingto my arms with her little tail wagging. I feel so bad for leaving her but I could do nothing. I knew the chances were slim. I finally called after about an hour and the vet told me that her heart had stopped about 30 minutes after I left. I went to pick her up and take her for one last ride in the car to see her Gammy (my mother). I broke down when the nurse handed her to me in a box and apologized for her being gone. I put her in the passenger seat with me and I told her I was sorry that I left her and how much I love her and miss her. I didn’t get to say goodbye but i know she knew how much I loved her. She was my baby and will always be my special friend. She always knew when I didn’t feel well or when I was happy. I just recentlyggot diagnosed with RA and don’t get around well anymore for my age (30). She always knew how to make me feel better and now I feel so empty without her. I’ve been crying since yesterday. 14 years of friendship and love was the best gift I could have asked for. I just wish she wouldn’t have left yet. I have another dog and I love her to death but Skittles and I had a very special bond from day one. I still remember going to pick her up from the breeder when she was a baby and carrying her around in my hoodie with me everywhere I went. I miss you sweet baby. Mommy will always love you.

    1. Ruth, I am so sorry for your loss. I lost my JJ almost the same way- he was a chihuahua and was 3 months shy of turning 13 years old. He was my son, my world, my soulmate. He slept with me every night but on the day he died, i remember waking up that day and he was still asleep. Normally, he’d wake up from the slightest sounds made but on that day, something was wrong. We went through the day however, relatively normal until he started acting funny. He kept panting with his head lifted and at the time, I relied on my exboyfriends car and he wasn’t supportive at all (hence the “ex”). After a few hours passed, he seemed ok again so i waited for my vet to open the next day by 9am (since it was already closed that day), but around 2:30am, JJ started breathing funny again, and came to me to be held. I picked him up and hugged him, telling him to hold on, then he wanted to jump down so I let him and about a minute after, he collapsed and I saw his body go limp. I performed CPR on him and he came to so I then rushed over to the ER but it was too late. JJ passed away on July 23, 2016 at 3:30am. The vet said they found fluid in his lungs. I’ve been searching for a similar case because I still don’t really know how this happened. JJ was just at the vet a month ago and was fine. About 4-6 months before that, he had surgery and again, was just fine. I’m still grieving and devestated by this loss. I have no support due to JJ being “just a dog” and at this point, those that were supporting me is frustrated that I’m still not “over it” after barely 5 months passed. I hope you are having better days than I am. I don’t know why but I just wanted to reach out to you since your Skittles passed almost the same way. I’m sure you’re in so much pain and I just wanted to tell you as well as the rest of the people going through losses, that I’m hurting with all of you. I feel your pain and hope one day, we can all find some peace….

  85. I lost my beloved Oscar on Oct. 1, 2016. He was an 11 yr old Boxer. My husband and I had him our whole dating relationship and 5 years of marriage. He slept with us every night. We took him with us on every vacation we went on, we always made sure to get a pet friendly hotel so he could be there. He was soft, sweet, and well behaved.
    We sacrificed a lot for him and always made sure he had the best of everything. He suffered 3 knee injuries because of his deer-like run. We went into debt to make sure he had the $3000 a pop surgery to make him healthy again. We always gave him the best medical care we could find. In the end, he developed osteoarthritis in his back. There was nothing we could do for him but keep him on pain pills everyday and use a carrier to help him get in and out when his back legs started to go out on him. He seemed to be happy for 6 months with the pain managed well.
    Almost overnight, something happened in his back….they think either a tumor on his spine, a slipped disc, or a piece of bone growth (arthritis) chipped off and damaged some nerves in his back. He was completely paralyzed now in the rear end. He was panting very hard and chugging a lot of water. He did not want to eat his dog food anymore and would barely eat his treats.
    We took him into the vet and there was nothing they could do. One of his back legs started to swell up as well and they could do nothing for it either. It was devastating knowing that nothing could be done. They explained that the increase in pain pills would not suffice and that he would suffer until he finally died…so we made the painful decision to have him euthanized.

    We buried him out on family land in the country next to another family dog that he knew. We are getting a granite stone made with his picture on it. It is difficult walking around a quiet house and coming home to emptiness everyday. We miss and love him very much and we would have maxed out every credit card we had to save his life if it were possible. In the end, we feel that we ultimately made the best decision for him by choosing to end his suffering and not let him continue on for another few days half dead and wanting to die. It is difficult even being at home without him. I feel like part of my heart was ripped out when he left. We both don’t see how we could ever have another dog, as one would never compare to the good boy that we had.

    1. You made the right decision . The same thing happened to my senior lab . He was fine and then his legs gave out . He wasn’t completely paralyzed yet but very weak. I took him to the vet on Monday . They wanted to try steroids and pain management . When I got home with him, he stopped eating . My partner wanted to be there to say goodbye and we were in denial (we thought it was the meds making him not eat). On Tuesday , we realized we couldn’t wait anymore . My partner rushed home from work to take to the vet either for emergency procedures or most likely euthanasia. The dog lost control of his bowels and was breathing heavy on the couch . I came around the corner , my boy looked up at me and passed . My partner didn’t make it in time . It was horrific. I wish I had recognized the signs sooner . I really didn’t want him to suffer . We adopted him 14 months ago . As a senior, we knew he wouldn’t have a lot of time but of course I wanted more . He had been by my side through surgeries and disabilities all year . We had no idea how sick he was as he never showed it until the last few days but I do wish I could have made his time easier . The only solace I have is that he passed away on his favorite spot and he saw me before he went .

  86. I lost my beautiful Desi 3 days ago, 8 year old Doberman. She was the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. I got her when she was just 3 months old and we bonded instantly. She slept in my bed every night and followed me everywhere I went. At 1 year old she ate my deck in the backyard and had to be rushed into surgery, vet said there was a good possibility she wouldn’t make it through. 1 week and 5000$ later she was ok and we were taking her stitches out in a few days. She slept under the blankets just like a person would. She was always so loving and didn’t have an aggressive bone in her body. When we had our son she treated him like he was her baby, trying to clean him and cuddle him all the time. As she got older the vet visits became more frequent and more and more expensive with her deteriorating body. A few nights before she passed she started hawking( as if she’s going to throw up) we thought maybe she ate some grass again as she does that sometimes. On Monday it got worse and we noticed she was panting, although she was still eating and happy to go outside. When I took her to the vet I got the crushing news that her heart was enlarged and her lungs have began to fill with water. Along with seeing some masses in her stomach and possibly the lungs. The vet told me honestly there was nothing I can do for her. She had developed a massive heart arithmya. The vet told me he can give her pills to drain her lungs and I would have about 48 hours with her and she wouldn’t be in too much pain as she didn’t seem to be bothered by anything except the panting. I brought her home and cried the whole time trying to come to terms with reality. Within hours her health deteriorated and she began having trouble breathing and couldn’t lie down. She looked at me like she was ready. I couldn’t refuse, as much as I was praying that she would pull through ( she’s escaped death a few times) I j ew I could not let her suffer. As my best friend and loyal companion of so many years. We took her to the DMV. I was so crushed I couldn’t speak, I just keep reliving the terrible moments lying in the floor with her as she took her last breaths. A part of me died in that room with her and I feel like I will never get over it. I want her back so bad, to smell her, to take our daily walks and her following me everywhere I go. I will never love another animal the way I have loved her. May her beautiful soul rest until we meet again.

  87. I just had one of my three cats euthanized last night due to increasing heart issues and bone cancer. She was 20 years old. I miss her so much and the only comfort I have at the moment is that I will be bringing her home again because I have chosen to keep her ashes. My heart feels like it has broken in to a million tiny pieces. I believe one of my other cats senses something is amiss and is now sleeping on my deceased cat’s bed. I do hug my other two cats that much more and tighter knowing that within the next five years, they will most likely be joining their big sister.

  88. In 2003 I found a litter of Dalmatians at an animal shelter. I wanted a girl so I took both into a room to play with. “Cricket” peed on me, that was the one. She chose me. A few weeks later she took part in a photo shoot with her brother and sister for the 2004 Hotlanta Fireman’s Calendar. It was such a fun day watching the puppies run around and play at the firehouse. We had renamed her to Akira and thus began many years of love and laughter that I thought would never end. Over the next 13 years some personal items were destroyed, but they were nothing compared to the countless bones, squeakers, and tennis balls that magically “exploded”. One of her favorite games was to locate the squeakers and unstitch the toy to remove the prize. But nothing compared to her infatuation with tennis balls. Hours and hours of throwing the tennis ball filled our lives. Ran or shine, she never tired of running out and catching that ball in midair. Over the years she began to slow down, she couldn’t run after the ball like she used to, and eventually she grew tired of even trying to chase the ball. Arthritis took hold in my once vibrant puppy. Her liver began to have issues. Her kidneys soon followed in decline. Her teeth were ground down from years of chewing balls like bubblegum. I still loved her then as much as the day she sat with her head cocked staring at me as we drove home from the shelter. I helped her up the stairs when they became too hard and hand fed her human grade refrigerated kibble to entice her to eat. We tried pain meds to help with her arthritis. Eventually it became evident that the pills were no longer helping to dull her constant pain. Digestion started to show signs of failing and she no longer got up to go to the bathroom. She was always the most obedient and loving dog. She wouldn’t even chase the rabbits in the yard unless I gave the order. The look in her eyes in her final days was evident. She was asking my permission to die. I didn’t want to give it to her. I wanted to demand that her body get better and I wanted her to stay with me. I could hardly bring myself to make that final phone call, but I wasn’t going to let her die in pain. With a knife in my gut and my heart ripped out of my chest I stroked her head as she took her last breath with tears streaming down my face. A piece of my soul left with her. She can gladly hold it until we meet again.

    I’ll love you forever my Princess Care Bear.

  89. I lost my beloved companion cat Willys last Tuesday. He was 15y/o. Although his age he was very healthy. Until two weeks ago he came down with some virus, but the people at the vet’s didn’t give him the correct treatment. He went to the vet’s three times in two weeks, and I would talk very often with his vet to explain I didn’t see any improvement in his health.
    He didn’t survive the last time I took him to stay the night because he was dehydrated. He died in a pool of diarrhea and it hurts so much to know that.

    I’m so heartbroken because I raised him since he was born, and also he was with me at so many lonely times in my life, I feel I failed him because I didn’t want to bring him to that vet’s hospital anymore due to a previous incident; but since that other Doctor wasn’t there anymore I kept bringing him there.

    Now he is gone and I miss his voice, his smell, his hair, the way he looked at me as if he understood what I was telling him, our routines, he would wake me up everyday to give him his food, then I would clean his box and give him fresh water with some ice. After that he would be pleased and just relax happily in the room and I would go to work until noon where he would wait for me or not at the door.

    Although he is survived by his mom car, it is not the same, they are both different in their behavior. He would follow me around and lay at my feet, drink from any cup I would place on the floor and spill the water. He was very special to me.

    I wish I knew where he is now and that I would see him again in eternity.

    Willys wherever you are now I’m so sorry I couldn’t be with you at your last breath, I miss you so much!!

  90. Dear Iris,

    I am so sorry for your loss. A beautiful soul has been laid to rest, far too early. It may not have been time for your poor dog to die…but it happened, and the grief must be unbearable.

    It’s so sad and unfair, but I don’t know what you can do about the veterinarian and the staff’s decisions and actions. I really don’t know. You might talk to a lawyer, but would that bring your beautiful dog back?

    It will take a long time for your grief and shock to subside. If I were in your shoes, I think I’d focus on healing and honoring my dog’s memory. After three or four months have passed, I might think about doing something about the injustice of it. Not necessarily suing or getting involved with the veterinarian, but trying to spread healing and peace to other dogs and dog owners somehow.

    I will will you in my prayers. May your beloved dog’s soul rest in peace, and may you find peace in this season of grieving.

    In sympathy,

  91. Our 11 year old Maltese had throat surgery three months ago and was doing great. Her chest x-rays and blood tests show she was in excellent health. Recently our dog cried in pain and looked very sad. She was not coughing, nor breathing heavy. She did not throw up She just looked troubled like something was hurting her. When I saw her lay on the floor stretched out in pain we took her to the animal hospital one Saturday evening. They were very busy and wanted me to leave our dog with them to give her oxygen. They refused to allow us to be with her. After an hour, we asked the staff to please check on her and they told us they were too busy to tend to her. I insisted on taking our dog home to another vet. They let me wait for half hour then they let me into the room to see our dying dog.
    They asked me if I wanted to resuscitate her. We were in shock. I did not bring a dying dog into the vet. Why wouldn’t they let me see her. They made false reports about her care and I cannot prove anything. I fear they injected her with a drug, because I said to my dog, “Come on, lets go bye bye” Her tail wagged and she tried to get up but couldn’t. She died a few minutes later. What did they do to her? Her paw had something for an intravenous, or something to give her meds, but they said they did not give her anything. What can I do about this? I’m still sad. I feel a terrible injustice happened here.

  92. I am so sorry for your loss. Coping with your pet’s death is painful, and unfortunately a lifelong sorrow.

    Here’s a poem that made me cry, and helped me see my dog in every gust of wind that passes…

    We Have A Secret

    We have a secret, you and I
    that no one else shall know,
    for who but I can see you lie
    each night in fire glow?

    And who but I can reach my hand
    before we go to bed
    and feel the living warmth of you
    and touch your silken head?

    And only I walk woodland paths
    and see ahead of me,
    your small form racing with the wind
    so young again, and free.

    And only I can see you swim
    in every brook I pass
    and when I call, no one but I
    can see the bending grass.

    – Author Unknown

    And here’s another article, with practical tips for coping with a pet’s death:

    Help Surviving the Loss of Your Pet

    In sympathy,

    1. We had to put my dog poppy down ,a westie, she was only 4 and 5 days. On the 20th of June we went to pick her up from a place which was supposed to cure her. It didn’t. They said she was better though she wasnt. She barely recognised us so my mum and dad had to put her down on the very same day. I don’t know if I want another dog. I just miss her so much it hurtd

  93. We lost our beloved dog Piper just last night. She was a 14 year old chihuahua and we’d had her for 3 1/2 years. From the day we took her home, she was my soulmate. I deal with chronic illness and pain and she was my faithful companion. She just understood me and I understood her. She was diagnosed with Congestive Heart Failure in March. Her condition was stabilized with meds and we thought she’d be with us for a lot longer. She had her pep back in her step and would even dash around like a puppy every now and again. Then suddenly, last Wednesday, she became clumsy. She was walking into walls and then lost the use of her front left leg. We took her to the vet and hoped it was something she could recover from, like a stroke. The news was devastating. They suspected a brain tumor and told us she wouldn’t recover. We decided to bring her home and prepare for to put her down. The next day, she rallied and seemed to recover! She was walking again. She was hungry and thirsty. She even started following me out the back door into the yard like she always had. However, by Monday she was weak again. She wanted to sleep all day and we had to coax her to eat by giving her baby food and potted meat. We knew it was near the end. We didn’t leave her for a moment. Except for one moment that will always haunt me. I walked into the kitchen for just a moment while she was asleep on the couch. My husband returned from an errand and we were chatting for just a moment. I heard a loud crash and we were horrified to find that Piper had taken a fall off the couch while having a seizure. She was so terrified after. I can’t believe I chose to leave her for a moment and the seizure happened!!!! We decided to have the hospice vet come to the house the next day to put her to sleep. She didn’t make it that long. Around midnight, she started having seizure after seizure and we made a mad dash for the emergency vet. They were lovely and let me hold her while my baby took her last breath. I am paralyzed by grief. I don’t know how to get through the day without her! I’d give anything to hold her one last time!!!!!

  94. Hello… I always thought that there was something wrong with me …the guilt is unbearable….I lost my beloved dog Bernard on June 4 2016. He was 14 1/2 years old ..blind ,deaf, I carried him most of the time to go out to do his buisness always holding him so he does not fall in his pee or poop.i always made sure the doggie door was closed if I had to go out because he would forget how to use it to get back in.i am in Az so as you could imagine it is very hot.i took care of him for so long..he was my baby…I love him so much.always cooked his food..spoiled him rotten….always had everything he needed ..he would slip around the house because I have tile all around…so I had rugs everywhere so he can walk around easier thru out the house…then that one day came…..I ran out to visit my mother at her group home..she is 95… Bernard was sleeping as he has been doing most of the time now….and this was the first time I forgot to close the doggie door…he managed to find the door to go out but could not figure out how to get back in ..I came home after visiting my mother and called out to him thinking he was still sleeping……but I found him outside ..had passed….the GUILT I have …I will never forgive myself……I know he only had a couple of months to live but this was no way to go…he had been so week he must had given up trying to find the door…I can not get the vision out of my head…… I ran to the vet hoping they can do something knowing he had already gone……his ashes will be back with me in a few days…I cry all the time…I have another little dog …and she is wondering where is Bernard…I look into her sweet eyes and just tear up…..I am so torn up …how long will this guilt last……I am always asking what if………what if……I thought that I was a good mom to my dogs ..and then this happens..the unthinkable….
    Writing about this helps me out alittle…and reading about others going thru their loss of their beloved pets…does help…I would like to find a suport group..I think that would help..I know it will lessen..the pain. But for now I am trying to deal with this loss and I know that one day I will but stil…..I miss him so much…my heart is so broken….
    Deep down I know I was and still a great mom..but the guilt will always be with me….
    I miss you my beloved Bernard….we will see each other again down the road….for now say hello to all the other pups up there romping around the beautiful grounds of Heaven……

    1. Hi Diane

      We both lost our beloved dogs just a few days a part. I don’t have words for you, still struggling with the loss of my beloved baby (my post is just below yours). What helped me a little with the guilt was visiting a dog shelter. This was no ordinary shelter, they take in really neglected dogs. I am planning to adopt one of these down and out doggies. Seeing them was really sad but I also realized that my dog had a really good life. Could I have done some things differently, sure but she was loved, she had a warm bed, food and a family till the very end. I had been really busy the week before she died and I regularly beat myself up over it. Little did I know it would be the last week ever with her. No dog will ever take Blixie’s place in my heart, I will miss her till the day I die but in the meantime I’m going to give a doggy who needs a home a family but the pain is still very much there. Hopefully Bernard and Blixie have met up in heaven and are having a whale of a time, being able to run again, pain free. Hugs Diane.

    2. I have just lost my westie on 23rd June she was 12 on 23Rd June a double whammy she developed diabetes about 6 weeks ago and I was giving insulin injection twice a day I have a mega needle phobia but I did it for her sadly she was wetting herself every night and losing weight sleeping all the time I knew it was time to do what I thought the kindest thing for her I made the decision on the 19th June I had 4 days of heartbreaking tears at what was coming I stayed with her something else I thought I’d struggle with but I did it for her as awful as it was the sedation bad enough I’m heartbroken she has been my constant for 12 years with me through highs and lows I miss her so much it’s unbearable at times I had her cremated and I’m not ready to bury her yet the emotion and feelings just appear it’s not been a week yet I keep expecting her to run into the garden or bark at the cats outside I knew I loved her I didn’t realise how much rip Muffin 23/6/2004 _23/6/2016

  95. 2 days ago, I made the painful decision to euthanize my beloved dog, Blixie. She was 15 years old and besides a bit of arthritis, she appeared to be perfectly fine. Her coat still had this amazing shine, she had her famous appetite and still played with my smaller dog. What seemed like overnight, a bump became visible on her hip. I first suspected that she had dislocated her hip but she was still walking on it so I took her to the vet the very next day. The vet booked her in for an X-Ray.

    That afternoon I got a call to say that the lump was unfortunately cancer and there was more bad news. They decided to do an abdominal sonar and she had a huge mass present. It was so large that they weren’t able to distinguish any of her organs. I was told that she had an incredibly aggressive cancer. She was discharged with really strong pain meds and given 6 weeks to 3 months with a very vivid description of what would happen to her during this time. I decided to keep her the weekend, spoil her rotten and then put her down next week.

    That night I gave her pain meds, with no effect. I eventually gave her double the prescribed dose and half a sleeping tablet. Eventually midnight she settled. In the morning her leg was starting to give way, she was crying and I decided it was time. 10am I took her in, she at first didn’t want to leave the house. They then battled to get a drip in and they asked to give her a sedative as she was just too stressed. I could hear her knocking everything over. They then called me in. I spoke to her, held her and gave the nod for the injection. Blixie gave me this massive lick right through the face just before she got the injection. I was shocked how quickly it worked. I was shattered as I saw her take her last breath.

    She was put into the backseat of my car. At home I dug a grave and then went to get her. I struggled to get her out of the car and it traumatized me in the process to see my vibrant brown eyed baby girl now a bloated lifeless form. I buried her and planted a beautiful garden above her.

    Blixie has been with me longer than any romantic relationship of mine has lasted and I feel like a child of mine has passed away. The last moments haunt me and although logically I know I spared her the painful death that lay before her, I feel like I took her life.

    I have irrational thoughts like, it’s winter now, and she must be so cold lying in the ground. I expect to see her around every corner. Everything in my house reminds me of her. Her “last meal”, lamb is still in the fridge. I bought her doggie chocolates to spoil her and some are still lying at the bottom of my bag. I can’t eat because every time I imagine how much she would love to share it with me. I knew this would hit me hard but I had no idea. Feels like my heart is physically breaking.

    1. Omg. I,am sitting here crying for your love story. Tomorrow I must put my mastiff/Sharpei to sleep, a beautiful foundling I discovered dumped at a friend’s back door 14 years ago, a 110lb. grown puppy. Everybody was drawn to this big beautiful dog with a great heart.
      I don’t know how I will survive the enormous hole in my life. I have so many times inhaled him, his fur, his everything, while I had him so I could fill myself and never forget. He’s sleeping now, Tramadol. He also looks perfectly healthy, nice oat, almost no gray not the muzzle. I guess we are so lucky for all this love.

  96. I lost my beautiful 13 1/2 year old lab on the weekend. She was my best friend and companion. Since making the heart breaking decision I have realized that although I have always lived by myself, I have never felt loneliness because I have always had my Honey girl. I know it was the right thing to do but that doesn’t take the pain away or make me miss her any less. As our aging faithful companions need more and more support and compensation to be able to do the everyday doggy things, it means that they are even more entrenched in our returns. A shared bed, helping her in the car, guiding her down stairs, I now look and she is not there. Those beautiful brown eyes trusting to the very end, I love her with all my heart. So so sad. I miss my girl.

  97. My dog Chili, a beautiful Chow Lab Mix died at 8:00 p.m. on March 31, 2016. He was diagnosed with bladder cancer on January 2014. I was told all the tumor was removed and clean edges were sewn together. The evening of March 29th blood was again in his urine. When I had a sonogram done at the specialty clinic, I was told the cancer had returned and it was now in other organs and had also invaded his lymph nodes. I knew the right thing to do was have him euthanized. It was only after he was gone that I blamed myself for not spending more money to have chemo that may have kept him longer with me. I’m having difficulty putting this behind me. There are so many of his behaviors that I had grown so accustomed to after spending almost 11 years with him, He worked in a nursing home with me. I was the administrator of an Alzheimer’s Unit. Chili was so loving and intuitive around the residents. He always knew when to approach or stay back. When I retired in 2012 he was not keen on retirement. On occasion I would take him back for a visit and he was always so happy to be “at work”. I know I will never have another dog quite like my Chili Dog.

    1. Please don’t ‘beat yourself up’, personally, I would never choose to put an animal through chemo or radiation. I think it is cruel to do that to humans, who can understand what is going on, but for animals it is not an option. And, I do not believe in either chemo or radiation for people either, especially when there are so many other option available if you check out Ty Bolingers series on Curing Cancer. It is amazing just how many people have survived better without using chemo or radiation. My animals mean the world to me, and I love each of them too much to make them endure further suffering on top of what any illness may bring them. And, I strive to feed them the best diet I can afford and to give them the happy lives they deserve, that is all any of us can do for them! Kind regards.

  98. 5 days ago I had to take my beautiful boy Travis to a vet we had never been to. Travis was 12 a handsome large golden retriver. My heart skips a beat every time he comes in my mind. I feel an emptiness agony heart break so deep in my chest. I tried so hard to keep him alive. I didn’t want to let him go. His death with the injection came fast the dr told me he was tired He was ready it was his time. I find myself looking for him when I gaze up from what ever I’m doing then I remember he isn’t here. I want to reach down and touch his beautiful red hair but it can’t he isn’t here. When I walk through the door I expect to see him standing there to greet me no matter if it was 2 hours or 10 min he was there. My cat was his friend I look at him and I see the sorrow on his little face. Travis isn’t here to cuddle with anymore. My grandchildren have lived with us for 7years they suffer as I do. Sad dreams come in their sleep. I see the light that shines in their eyes go suddenly dim. A tear reflection in their eyes. Walking slowly head held down. My husband gone from home in the hospital for2 months Travis waited for him. The day He came home Travis never got up to walk again. He feels guilt for leaving for so long. Our home Our hearts are empty for our beloved friend Travis. Will it ever be the same. It was only 2 years ago my Mom passed away. Now I carry them both in my heart my heart how it breaks.

  99. In June of 2013, I adopted a 15 year old red tabby from a shelter as a companion for another senior cat. My other senior was grieving the loss of a brother several months before. After adopting Riley I found that he was battling renal failure. I began giving Sub-Q fluid treatments. Soon thereafter, my other senior became very ill, passing away in November.

    Riley had already been discarded as a senior, taken to a vet for euthenasia. The vet thankfully found him a place in a no kill shelter where I adopted him. He was not going to be discarded again.

    Dealing with a chronic disease such as CRF and him being very senior already, I had to come to terms that he may not last long. We just took it one day at a time.

    He had issues. Working with my vet, we were able to pull him from the edge many times. Over the course of 32 months, I came to love that little boy so deeply. I had to feed him every 3-4 hours to prevent him becoming sick, watching for UTIs, or GI problems.

    I am amazed at how deeply that boy embedded himself in my heart.
    On February 4, 2016, Riley turned 18 years old. I had been battling his GI issues caused by the renal failure. His weight had dropped from 7 pounds to 5 lb, 10 oz. Keeping him eating was difficult. On the 17th of February I took him to the vet.

    We had the discussion that it may be difficult to tell when to let go of Riley. We had pulled him back from the edge many times. That night he took a bad turn for the worse.

    I had to let him go on February 18. The vet came to my home. He passed at home laying on the bed, with his paws wrapped around my arm.

    I came to love that sickly but loving little guy so much. Each day since, I’ve cried repeatedly. The house seems so empty with just one remaining cat. Each day I come home, running through the list. Do I need to heat fluids? What has he been eating? Get the pepcid, zantaq, cerenia. So much of my life routine has now disappeared.

    I don’t miss that terrible renal failure, but I so miss my little boy. Having to be so in tune with the boy which lead to nothing. A void.

    I am back to one day at a time. I am grateful for those 32 months, finding just how deeply I can care for a companion animal. I know the pain will numb down after time, never to disappear. But I don’t want the pain to just go away. The pain pulls me to some of the many wonderful times I shared with my boy. I remember him so fondly, and miss him so deeply.
    Goodbye my sweet Riley.

  100. Dear Jenny,

    I’m so sorry for your loss. Coping with a pet’s death is always difficult – but when you lose a dog you grew up with, the grief is heartbreaking.

    Give yourself time to grieve your dog’s death. Beauty loved you and was fully devoted to you. She has such a special place in your heart, and you will never forget her. Take time to remember your experiences with her. Maybe create a small photo album or photo collage of her. Write about her – that’s one of the most healing ways to cope with pet loss. Share your stories of her.

    Allow yourself time and space to cry. She was hugely important to you, and you need to honor her memory and her life. Know she is resting in peace, and her spirit will always be with you. She has a firm place in your heart, and she will always be with you.

    In sympathy,

  101. On January 13th I had to let my beloved dog Beauty, an english cocker spaniel of 15 years, go. I grew up with her and I can´t even remember how my life was before her. She´s been with and by me through my worst times and we grew especially close after my mother died 8 years ago. Since my siblings were already grown up and moved out at that time and my dad had his own issues to deal with, she was the one to comfort me and make me feel loved. and I loved and still love her just as much. she really was and still is my Baby. I think it is especially painful because it all happend so quickly. Sure she wasn´t the youngest anymore, but she still looooved Food, loved to play (only if Food was involved, she was a cocker Spaniel after all :)) or we played hide and seek. At Christmas, she was just fine, even destroyed the packages she got out of happiness. and a few days later it started… at first she just didn´t want to eat her meals anymore, but still liked her treats… then, day by day, she ate less and less until one day she started vomiting, so we brought her to an animal Hospital where we left her for 4 days to get kidney Treatment, because apparently someting was wrong because of the drugs she got. Since our actual vet knew I would do anything for her she promised everything would be fine and they would do anything they could to help her get better. the next day she called me, saying she was talking to all kinds of specialists and they think she might have some Kind of cancer, they just don´t exactly know where and since my dog was too weak already, it would be best to put her down. I really never wanted to have to make that decission but I saw her, she wouldn´t eat or Play anymore, didn´t even want to go for walk because her feet were to weak, so I had to make that decission. And i didn´t leave her side till the end but it was just the worst thing in my life. I feel like i killed her, and i don´t even know what exactly the cause of her sudden weakness was. i just constantly think, if i had acted sooner, or didn´t give her the drugs the vet gave us, she might still be alive. I just feel so unbearably guilty for not having done more to help her after all she has done to help me. She just really was the best thing in my life and i just miss everything about her. no matter how bad of a day i had, the second i came home to her, everything was great. And everyone who knows me knew she was always my number one priority and i would have given up anything to still have her with me…
    I´m sorry this got so long, thanks to everyone who read this. i really appreciate it.

    1. My name is Cole and I am almost 15 years old. Today, my Bichon Frise dog Maggie just turned 16 and had to be put down by the vet. Maggie and I grew up together, and 5 years ago after my other dog Molly died, we got closer than ever. She was the healthiest dog, she got in to so many things that she shouldn’t have, but she was always okay. She seemed invincible and I knew she would die, but it never seemed like it would happen. Now the past couple of months she has gradually slowed down, little things like sleeping more and more and not being able to jump on chairs and couches like she used to, but she could still go on long walks and run around the back yard like her full athletic dog self at times. Suddenly, this morning she started acting like a completely different dog. Me and her have a bond where she can tell when I am upset and I can tell when something is going on with her. She was walking around with her head drooped almost down to the floor and I walked her in our front yard to go pody, and she was having lots of trouble getting up the porch steps. I kept texting my dad during school to see how she was doing and he said nothing had changed, and in my study hall, the office lady came up to me and said my dad was going to be at my school in 10 minutes. I knew something was wrong. My dad told me she was losing control of her back legs and the doctor checked her out when we got to the vet and calmly told us that he thought something was going on with her brain and gave us our options. He told us that her quality of life had gone way down and that her eyesight was practically gone. So my dad was in tears but thought we shouldn’t put her through all of this suffering so we euthanized her and I chose to stay in the room and held her in my lap because I love her so much and she was like a sister to me. She died in my arms and we had to leave. Her body in those blankets on that couch leaving that room is going to haunt me forever. I miss her so much I have been sobbing uncontrollably all night and don’t know what I am going to do with my life. I just have to believe that she is playing on rainbow bridge with her sister Molly. I am so sad because she was always a normal routine and part of our lives in my family. I feel sooo guilty because last night I was mad and stressed and she knew it and came up to me but I didn’t pet her because I was mad. I don’t know what to do with myself I just want my baby Maggie back.

      1. Hi Cole,

        I know things are really hard right now. I have been there. My lab Chance was 100 pounds, 14 years and 4 months old and the sweetest guy in the world. He had throat problems and arthritis for the last 4 years of his life. I cooked for him, gave vitamins and pills, got him acupuncture and laser therapy and he had 2 6,000 dollars surgeries on his throat. In December, I noticed that he was not walking as much, and twice he could not get up off of his side laying on the floor. I came home and once he was stuck under the bed and another time he was just running his legs back and forth until his paws were bloody. I didn’t realize how serious this was. On January 3rd, I went out on a date. I moved the bed so Chance couldn’t get stuck under it and had plenty of room to move if he fell. I came home the next morning and opened the door and said “Chance!.” I didn’t see him. I ran into the bedroom and at some point during the night he must have fallen off the bed (which was only 1.5 feet high). He had plenty of room but for reasons I will never know, he had moved his body completely under the bed. He was dead when I found him. I think he had a heart attack because he laid there on the floor and exhausted himself moving his legs back and forth. I saw the bloody marks on the carpet.

        I am a 47 year old man. I have cried nearly every day since Chance died. The guilt of not being there almost killed me. BUT I’m telling you this story because the hurt will lessen. I say to people, it doesn’t get any easier; it just gets less hard. Find a way to express your grief. I did mine through writing. I had written a blog about Chance living in New York City since 2009. I poured my heart and soul into January and February to finish my blog and for it to be something that I am proud of to honor his memory. Look at my blog to see what I mean. I wanted to make sure that I always remember that Chance was my best friend and I don’t want to forget anything. Maybe writing will help you; I see that you are a good writer. But if that doesn’t work, try something else. Talk to people, cry, get mad, do whatever it is you need to process Maggie’s death. And don’t ever let anyone tell you how you should be grieving. It is a deeply personal process.

        It has been 4.5 months since I lost Chance. I have stopped beating myself up over what I see as letting him down. i try to focus on the 14 incredible years we had. I have his ashes with me and I talk to him every day and say goodnight at night. I take solace that I know that Chance is watching over me and that he will be waiting for me when my time comes.

      2. Thank you D I really appreciate this, god bless you. I miss her lots but I have started to feel a tiny bit better this week. It is hard sometimes because the house feels empty but I know, like Chance for you, she is watching over me. Thank you for relating to me, and I am sorry for your loss. It is hard when our loved best furry friends die. Thank you so much for the advice and I am sorry about Chance, he lived a good life though, I can tell, that is pretty old for a lab. Thanks Again, Cole

  102. Dear Theresa,

    Thank you for being here, and sharing how difficult it has been to cope with your pet’s death. It’s so heartbreaking to lose an animal! Dogs are so devoted to us, and they leave a huge hole in our lives after they die. It’s very sad, and hard to handle.

    The only thing that helps me is my faith in God. I’ve given so much pain and grief to him, it’s a wonder He’s still around! All my worries and anxieties are piled on His big strong shoulders….leaving me free to live in this moment.

    If you can find ways to live in this moment, you may find relief from the grief. If you can be present right here, right now, you may be able to let go of the anxiety and fear.

    It’s also possible that you’re grieving other, older pains and griefs from your past. Your Bailey’s death may be triggering all that old stuff that you haven’t dealt with. This would be a good thing to talk about with a counsellor.

    Can you think of anything that makes you feel better, that brings relief from the pain and anxiety?

  103. I lost my 12 year old Bailey a year ago. It was the worst thing I have ever experienced. I miss him everyday. My issue now is that when one of my other two dogs show the slightest issue, a little diarrhea, a little sick to their stomach, a little lethargic, it causes such severe anxiety in me, I do not know how to cope. I am so afraid to lose them, too. I have had them both at the vets office so many times this year, for the slightest issue. It takes weeks for the fear and anxiety to go away, just to come back with the slightest issue. I knew losing Bailey would be terribly hard, he was my baby. I’ve been to my doctor for help but of course most people do not really understand how severe the loss of the pet can be. But, I thought grief was the only issue I would have and hoped that time would heal…time has just made me more anxious and afraid.

  104. I’m sorry for your loss, Adriana. Your Bambino was so young, and you loved him so much! There is no pain like the grief of losing our beloved pets.

    I have no magic words for healing…I just wanted to say I wish he hadn’t died. Thank you for being here.

    In sympathy,

  105. I’ve had my Bambino (cat) since he was 2 weeks old -blue point Himalayan-found dumped in my back yard -I nursed him and made him live. He grew up to be a beautiful cat -that acted like a dog we would take walks and everyone would be amazed. On Saturday out of the blue at 4am I heard a cry and I saw him dragging his hind legs in pain . I rushed him to the vet and they said there was nothing they could do he had saddle thrombosis-a blood cot from his heart to his legs, I rushed him to VCA referral and they kept him there overnight on meds and running all these exams on him. They called to say that I had to take him to a VCA Cardiologist and I did . That is when they told me he had only 10% to live , his kidney were failing and he had renal failure . It would be best to put him to sleep because he was in pain , I did not care if I had to take out a loan , I wanted my little boy to live , he was only 5 years old , my pride and joy . I was his mom and wanted the best for my boy . Yes, I am angry because I did not see any signs, what did I miss , he was healthy , running and playing the day before -where did I go wrong . I am upset with God ..which I should not but I loved my baby and he died on my Mother’s one year death anniversary which I am still grieving for her . I miss him so much …I cry and I blame for myself because I failed in not seeing any signs of illness or distress . I am so sad:(

  106. I’m so sorry for your loss. Coping with a pet’s death is one of the most painful experiences we ever face, and there are no easy answers.

    May you find peace and healing as you grieve your loss. Know that your beloved pet is resting in peace, floating on a cloud of love, joy, and serenity. Try to let your dog or cat go. Heal. Open your heart to love again. Be well.

  107. I had to put my beautiful sheltie down a couple of days ago…he was only 6 years old and in his prime. We had him for 3 1/2 short months, but I can honestly say he was the best dog we have ever had. I adopted him from the local shelter and he was in bad shape when we got him. He was underweight, flea infested and anemic and had an infection in his body. After many trips to the vet, good food and lots of love and exercise, he was healthy and his gorgeous coat came back. He loved his food and always scarfed it down. I noticed after about 2 months that he wasn’t eating and was drinking tons of water, so we went back to the vet and he was diagnosed with hypercalcemia. Upon further investigation the results came back that he had lymphoma. We were devastated as he was only 6. The vet said he had T-cell lymphoma and even though it was early stages (only one lymph gland was slightly enlarged) she thought it best just to give him presdnisone since the outlook was not good for this type of cancer. I took him home and gave him meds and also gave him steak/chicken/liver and no carbs. I also gave him omega oils. It seemed to be going well. He was eating fine, he had tons of energy and I was getting hopeful. This lasted about 5 weeks and then he stopped eating again. The prednisone had stopped working and he was out of remission. I cried for 4 days and kept trying to feed him anything and everything and he just wouldn’t have it. He would lie out on our cold sunroom floor just staring out in space. But he would rally every time I went outside he would want to play ball or try to catch the laser light. I kept thinking how can a dog be so listless and not eat but still rally enough to play. On the 5th day I took him in to the vet. His gums were very pale and she thought it was time, so I had him euthanized. I cry when I think of the horrible first 6 years he had to his life. He was mistreated and starved and then only had 3 1/2 short months where he was loved and cherished. Life is just not fair. I don’t think I will ever find a dog like Joey. I can’t even talk to any body about him, as I start to cry. I am devastated.

  108. My dog just died a while ago he’s almost 5 months old. His name is PaoPao. He got sick for almost 6 days before he died.The first 3 days his not eating totally but drinking water and always vommit and had a diarrhea the worst thing is we saw blood in his stool so we decided to bring him to the vet. They examine him and said because of the medicine we give to him to kill the worms in his stomach and he has a high fever. They inject vitamins and medicines. Then on the 4th day he became a little stronger he never vommit or any stool. But still his not eating. But he just taste a little meat. And we bring him to the vet for follow up check up they give him oral vitamins and antibiotics. The next day he looks fine eating a little very little ang his always sleeping all day. On the 6th day morning we saw a vommit and a stool with blood and i saw his stomach became bloat he still doesnt want to eat. That why i decided to bring him again in the vet. They said his so pale. His ears gums are pale. The inject him vitamins and examine his blood if what going on. Then at the night i give him food force food i put in syringe. Then the next day we just saw him lying in the ground not breathing and so cold his like an ice and his stomach is so bloated and i saw he vommit. I dont know what happen i just cant accept that happen to him. His just young so young. I did everything to make him survive im giving him always dextrose but still he died. I miss him so much:( if theres only thing i can do to make him back again alive and healthy.. ????

  109. I lost my bestfriend, my forever love kimchee, he died yesterday 11/23/2015. He had a heat stroke. Before he died , we both help each other for him to recover, he was looking at me struggling to live. I know he doesn’t want to leave me, I know he knows how I needed him. Last thing he do is he tap my hand and make a sound for goodbye and love. Seeing him catching his breath is like stabbing a knife into my heart. As I cry watching him his eyes rolls some tears. I can fell the pain he had. If I could just buy him more life, I would! He is the most perfect dog I could ever had. I miss him so much that I
    Want to hug him so tight. And as I wake up today, tears fell down into my cheeks, No Kimchee in my bed, that will get my pillow and blanket, No kimchee sleeps in my arms, No kimchee’s noise. It’s too hard to deal things without him ?????
    RIP my Love! You may not be in my arms anymore, but you will remain in my heart. My mom misses you a lot, she miss feeding you,can’t even look at your bowl, everyone misses you. You were not a dog, you were everything. I love you buddy! ?

  110. So today I lost the true love of my life. She was 15yrs old, had a cold nose, and was my every happiness.

    For some time now, I knew that this day was going to come, and for the past couple of months I tried to prepare myself for the inevitable, and every day I prayed for just a little longer. Lizzy was my angle, and my greatest joy, but the unfortunate ravages of time were not going easy on her. Over the course of the past year, I had the unpleasant experience of seeing her dwindle to literal skin and bones as she went from 70lbs to a final 45lbs at the end. But again, I held onto hope that something could be done, and I did not care what the expense would be so long as my little girl could stay with me. For her it started in September of this year when i noticed a lump on her back side about the size of an egg. I took her to a local vet in PA, as I was in town visiting my father, and was informed that it was likely a tumor in her anal gland, but due to her age, the vet did not want to risk surgery.
    Moving forward to October, I noticed that the mass was almost double in size, and my little girl was having allot of difficulty getting up. Once again I went straight to the vet and was told again that treatment was not a good choice because of her age, but not to worry too much as the mass was not likely to cause any real problems, as they tend to be semi common. Moving forward again to the beginning of November, my baby girl was having problems going potty and I was starting to carry her around the house (reminded me so much of her as a puppy). Again went to the vet and spoke with a visiting doctor to get a second opinion in hopes of having the tumor removed. He told me that because of her age, anesthesia at her age had a fairly high mortality rate, and suggested I think about the surgery and her quality of life after. So I went home and continued to watch my lazy girl. Since that visit, I had become attuned to the sound of her falling and would come home for lunch just to make sure she was alright. Then came Friday November 13th.
    I came home and found her on the ground trying to get up, but when I tried to get her up, she would just fall over again. I was absolutely distraught. But decided to let her go over the weekend before making any decisions. Over the weekend, she was back to herself, staggering, but able to move about. But her bowel movements had me concerned as the tumor had grown to the point where it was severely restricting her ability to poop. So yesterday I made some calls and got in to see a vet this morning to operate. In my mind, 50% was better than 0%, and with the mass gone, I had hopes that some of her mobility would return as well. This morning at 9:30 I showed up, and explained the situation. At 10, my baby girl was taken in the back for xrays and bloodwork. At 10:05 she came back, and at 10:15 the vet came in with the xray results. He showed me how a large mass was inside her abdomen and how her intestines were being pushed up into her rib cage, and this was the problem of her going potty. He also explained that because of the size, no operation would help. Starting to choke up, I asked how long she would have if we just let it go, only to be told “weeks”. Looking at my love, and starting to tear up, the discussion of “processes” began. Today at 10:45, despite having gone to the vet with great hope, or at least continued time, my little girl succumbed to an overdose of anesthetic while I held onto her, sobbing, and continually nuzzling and kissing her behind the ear. Today I lost my everything, and I would do anything to take the day back.

  111. My little dog boy, Oreo passed away last week, Oct. 28th at almost 16 1/2 yrs old. I miss him terribly and have been depressed and feeling dizzy. At night, I keep waking up at 4:30 AM the time he would wake up when he would need to go and pee. I know he’s gone but I feel really down. I have 3 other small dogs and I know I have to bring good energy for them but it is really really hard.

  112. Thank you for posting this. My 8-year-old german shepherd Balto had to be put down yesterday afternoon after finding out that he had bladder cancer. He was acting fine until becoming very sick on Friday night. I haven’t been able to stop crying since and I am becoming very depressed. I miss him so much and the shock of losing him so quickly and the sadness is very deep. I have no idea how I am going to cope. I did not know that he was going to get put down yesterday (I was at school all day), I just knew that my mom was going to take him to the vet to have surgery to see what was wrong with him. I gave him a few scratches behind the ears and told him I loved him and would see him later. I had no idea that would be the last time I saw him. When I came home yesterday at around 6:00 PM I was told he had been put down. I can’t deal with the emotions that I am facing right now. As sad as I would have been, I wish that I would’ve been there by his side yesterday, or if I could’ve had one more day with him. I keep wondering if he was in pain or if he was scared and it kills me inside. I miss him so much and just want him to know how much I love him. ):

  113. Laurie Pawlik-Kienlen

    Thank you all for being here, and sharing your experience with your pet’s death. I know your comments help other readers cope, and I am grateful that you’re here.

    Karen, I’m sorry you lost Lupe – but I’m so glad she told you it was time to go. Not all dogs do that, and not all pet owners know when it’s time. I can’t imagine losing my dog Tiffy! I’ll never be the same after she’s gone. I’ve been thinking about your question about outliving a new dog, and wrote an article about adopting a dog for “older” women (though I don’t think 62 is old at all!!!).

    I hope it helps, and wish you all the best. May your heart heal, and may you find strength and hope to open your home to another dog. I also pray for your other dog. I can’t tell you if you should get another dog…but I hope you read my article, in which I share my thoughts.

    In sympathy,

  114. I had to put my beloved chihuahua, Lupe, to sleep October 11th and I’m devestated. I have 3 pets I love immensely and they are all getting old. Lupe was 12 years old and my soul mate, we were always together and I lost her suddenly to cancer. She stopped eating and she told me with her eyes it was time to let her go. I wasn’t with her when they put her to sleep bease I knew when she saw me she thought she would be going home with me. My dog Ren Bear is 16 and is slowly declining with age and my cat Boadicea is 15. Every day I wake up and wish I could just go back to sleep because I miss her so much and I cry 20 times a day. Now I get to look forward to losing my other 2 best friends. I myself am getting older being 62 in December and would love to get a small dog not to take anyone’s place but I feel so lost and alone. Also, is it fair to get a dog when you might not outlive the pet? I would do anything to have Lupe by my side. She was a small dog with the biggest heart and the best Chihuahua ever. Love you forever Lupe. I’ve lost other pets from old age but the death of Lupe has been the hardest!

  115. I had to euthanize Sadie yesterday. She was my beautiful Jack-Rat, a shelter puppy rescue. She was just shy of turning 5 years old. The grief has been overwhelming. I have moments of blaming myself, not taking her to the vet sooner than I did. I know it wouldn’t have made a difference, but that doesn’t keep the “what ifs” from entering my mind. She has always been an active, energetic dog (read: part Jack Russell!). Three days ago she was acting very lethargic. I thought she just had an upset stomach and it would pass. When she didn’t eat breakfast the next day, I brought home some chicken and rice to cook for her after work. I couldn’t even get her to lick the drop of broth I placed on her nose. After letting her rest a bit, I took her out to potty and it was mostly blood. I scooped her up for a trip to the animal ER where she spent the night on an IV. Yesterday morning I transferred her to her primary vet where he ran tests and diagnosed her with autoimmune hemolytic anemia. I’ve never heard of such a condition. After visiting with the doctor and researching, it’s essentially a condition where the immune system destroys red blood cells. I couldn’t understand how it came about so suddenly and aggressively, still don’t. I sat with her yesterday at the vet’s office, talking to her and giving her the best belly rub ever. At one point she pulled her weak body up and sat looking at me as if to say “ok mom, let’s go home!”. I could see she was getting tired and needed rest, so I let her be, still hoping for a positive outcome when I left. Hoping the drugs would slow her immune system so her body could begin to heal. A few hours later the vet called with the worst news, she had deteriorated quickly. I was back in the office within minutes and saw her subdued body laying on the table. I spoke to her, petted her, but she could no longer raise her head or even focus her eyes on me. I’m thankful I was there to love on her as the doctor placed the drug into her IV and she took her last breath. I’m thankful I was able to give her a home when she so desperately needed it several years ago. All the good times will surely be all I think of eventually, when I remember her. Right now I’m consumed with how much I miss her. I have two other dogs, one of whom was her best buddy. This morning he was licking the blanket she always laid on. Seeing that put a catch in my throat. It’s the little things that are most difficult – not hearing her nails on the floor coming down the hallway, not hearing her moan and sigh in her funny way when she curls up for a nap, not having her keep my hip warm as she lays beside me while I’m watching tv. Each dog has their own spot on the couch and by golly, my hip was hers and she made sure the others knew about it. She was just the best dog, smart and clever. I think this is most difficult as she was young and this was unexpected. As dogs age, we have a greater grasp on their time drawing near and slowly over the years we unknowingly prepare ourselves to some extent. I feel blindsided. Four days ago she was her normal self, full of shenanigans. It all changed so incredibly quickly.

    So many people don’t understand the grief felt over losing a beloved companion. This morning I felt foolish for randomly crying. Thanks to this article and to those of you sharing your stories, I’m not ashamed I’m grieving a dog. She wasn’t just a dog to me. I’ll let the tears flow as they may, knowing there’s some like-minded people out there that would hand me a tissue. Blessings to all of you as you heal your hearts.

  116. I just had to put my oldest cat down yesterday and while I have lost many pets in my life, I still felt it therapeutic to read articles on coping with the loss of a pet.

    While I have been through pet loss many times, it still does not make it any easier. There are many people out there that hurt so much after pet loss that they never want to go through it again with a new pet, but for me the unconditional love you receive from a great pet is everything which is why I could never imagine a house without pets.

    This article really does a great job discussing pet loss. Some people cope differently than others. My spouse, for instance, always goes through the stages of grief with our pets and right now he is on the guilt and bargaining stage with our recent loss. Like me, our children are going through bouts of crying wishing we could have had more notice that we were losing him. Our cat was twenty and surprisingly a pillar of health, but just collapsed out of no where. He had a check-up back in June with blood work and everything came back fine. We rushed him to the vet and he sadly was experiencing irreversible heart failure making the decision to put him to sleep easy, but it did not make it hurt any less. I have been in situations where that decision was not easy because the cat or dog still looked so vibrant in the face in spite of its terminal illness or poor quality of life.

    While coming here personally gives me strength, if I can help anybody who may have stumbled on here like myself and is in complete agony, I will tell you that it does get easier but you will never stop missing or loving your pet. Some pet losses are worse than others and you should not feel guilty over that. It’s okay if you keep crying or just cannot function. You need time to grieve. It is also normal weeks or months from now to be crying over this beloved member of the family. There has been some times where it’s been years yet I will cry for that pet in isolated instances. I’ve even taken a day off work before following a pet death and have kept the kids home from school for a day. There is no shame in that as the loss of a pet is honestly no different than a human in spite of what non-animal people may say.

    I absolutely agree with what was said about getting a new pet. We have always been a multiple pet family, but when one goes it still changes the dynamics of our household. While we do wait a short while, we always get a new pet when we are ready. There is nothing wrong with that and do not let anyone tell you it’s too soon or that you should wait a year; all you have to remember is to never look at the new pet as an exact replica of the old pet even if he/she is the same breed and looks exactly the same.

  117. I’m into the 2nd day after the loss of my beloved “little boy” Bear – Border collie, passed away in the cradle of my arms. Under the circumstances, I couldn’t have hoped for a better way for him to go as there were no accidents, just 15years and 9 months. He aged to where life was longer manageable under his own will, although his spirit in his gently clouded over eyes expressed love beyond anything I have ever felt. I found him perched on a snowbank in the ditch of a cold alberta winter in January 2000. He was barely weaned he was so small. A literally saved little boy, I took him home despite being late for my first day on a new job. We went everywhere together through the years and I believe he was a gift for me as I was to him. I’m deeply shattered by the loss now. Trying to deal with life and I cannot stop thinking about Bear and his needs, which now are no longer. Like caring for a invalid whom you had a special connection that no-one would understand, and to love even more because they are like babies again, sweet, loving and just as precious as possible. Im a 55 year old adult and I can’t stop crying over him, it hits me in waves, out of the blue, at home, outside, no matter what I’m doing, working, anywhere. The price I have paid for his love is devastating to me, and I have to say that this loss is just soo painful. :'(((

  118. Reading all of your stories has been so cathartic for me as this weekend I had to say goodbye to one of the sweetest dogs I’ve had the pleasure of knowing. We got Mais when she was just a puppy and watched her grow from a lovable little rascal to one of the most sweet natured dogs anyone could ever meet. She was such an individual character, so independent but loving and needy when she wanted to be. She was hit by my neighbour’s car on Friday evening and nobody was home at the time. When my dad got home he and my brother noticed she was struggling to walk and rushed her straight to the vet where she was placed on anaesthetic and kept overnight for surveillance. I spent the entire night distraught thinking I would wake up to the news that she had passed during the night. However when morning came we received word that she was bright, alert and ready to be examined in the afternoon. When we got to the vets we were told that he couldn’t feel any obvious breakages but as she was so content in herself he would let her home for the weekend, heavily medicated, and she would have to return first thing Monday for an X-ray. The whole weekend she was a happy little thing, so delighted to see well wishers come and go and did her best to rise to greet them. However, the damage that was done to her hips became all the more apparent and it was obvious that she was badly hurt. Our worst fears were confirmed when she returned for an X-ray. Her pelvis was broken in four places and had becomes detached from her spine. Only expensive surgery could attempt to fix her and even then success wasn’t guaranteed. My parents had the terrible task of deciding to put her to sleep, a decision that was supported by the vet. Even in her final hours she was as bright as a button and content on the company of her loved ones. This made the whole ordeal so much harder. Now she has passed and I have spent so much time crying and morning the loss of such a wonderful dog. But as I mentioned at the beginning, to read the stories of so many people in the same position has lifted some of the heaviness that weighs on my heart at the moment. I know losing a dog before their time is absolutely heartbreaking, but euthanasia is sometimes the kindest thing to do. We will never forget our little dog xx

  119. 2 days ago on August 6th I woke up to find my dog had passed away while I was asleep. He was only 5 years old and there had been no warning signs and I was heartbroken. Duke was my sanity, anytime I would come home upset he was there.
    I have a jar disorder and this past Sunday my jaw locked up. I was hurting, I couldn’t eat and I couldn’t sleep but I was still going to work, and each night he would love on me trying to make me feel better. On Wednesday I went to the hospital and I felt horrible when I finally made it home, and Duke laid on me like he was trying to make me feel better. That night, I really could not sleep, something was wrong, but he was acting normal, finally around 5 am Thursday morning, I fell asleep, and when I woke up at 8 he was gone. My heart was broken and I ran to wake my mom, wanting to be wrong. I have gone from blaming myself for falling asleep to blaming myself for being hurt… Somehow I know it is my fault, and I know my family blames me. I don’t know how I will get past this because he has been there for 5 years to make me feel better…and now I have no one…. We have other dogs and I am at the point that I don’t want to go home because I don’t want to be the cause of anything else, but also because its hard to face my family….I know this probably seems irrational, but its how I feel…

  120. I can’t stop crying. We had our beloved chocolate lab put down today at the age of 13.5. We think he may have had cancer since he went from weighing 110 lbs. down to 53 lbs. I have been crying for two days knowing what was coming and I was sobbing so hard I could not go with my hubby to take him to the vet. I feel guilty although I did give him a very big hug, told him I loved him and that someday I would see him again.
    The house feels empty. I feel empty. I have never been this sad in my life I can’t stand it.

  121. Lost my Spodge yesterday, died at the vets, only had him for just over 2 years, he was a stray we took in. There was a housefire, started in my bedroom Sunday morning, I got home from work to find the aftermath.
    Spodge came to bed with me every night, and slept there when I was at work in the night. Fire started in the tortoise house, so have lost my 2 torts too peewee and bodger, who I have had 10 years.
    The family could not get into my room(they say) and so Sppodge was alone in there for 10 mins before the fire brigade came, he must of run off frightened, when they got there, he appeared about 9am. Took him straight to the vets, he was not burnt, but suffered from smoke inhalation. He was in a oxygen tank for 2 days, all touch and go, thought he was going to get better, I would of paid all my life savings to make him better. But the vets phoned yesterday morning to say he had passed away.
    I am heartbroken, I have lost my cat and 2 torts, I am blaming my family for not trying to go into the room and try and get them. I just cannot stop crying, blaming myself too, if I had been there that night, I could of saved them. Not really ate for 3 days, just greiving so bad, I do not think I can get over losing him.
    I even cannot stand to go into my bedroom now, not because of the fir damage, but memories of Spodge kipping on my bed, the tortoises. I look at various things in the house and garden, everything is reminding me of him, HE WAS HERE YESTERDAY, I just cannot stop crying.

  122. Dear Deborah,

    Thank you for being here, and sharing a little bit of Hailie’s life. She’ll be forever alive in spirit here, and in our hearts. My dog Tiffy is a 7 lb toy poodle, and I believe we have a deeper bond with those little dogs. Tiffy is so vulnerable, yet so brave and full of attitude! Don’t mess with her! When she dies, I will be heartbroken.

    It sounds like you feel like you betrayed her somehow — but I believe that letting an old dog go is the most loving thing we can do for her. The biggest, most important part of loving a dog is seeing when they need our help and compassion. Death is scary and sad, but it may also be a million times better than living in an old dog body with seizures and who knows what other aches and pains.

    You didn’t let Hailie down. You loved her right to the very end, and you made the supreme sacrifice of deciding to put her to sleep. She is resting in peace, not struggling in life. You loved her with all your heart and soul, and she knew it. She wants you to remember her with peace, love and joy…and my prayer for you is that you find the strength and courage to forgive yourself, make peace with Hailie’s life and death, and open your heart to love another wonderful dog who needs a human just like you.

    About healing from the extreme grief you feel about Hailie’s death – have you talked to a counselor? It might help you to process the pain, and learn how to let go of the guilt you feel for not “saving” her.

    I’ll keep you in my prayers.

    In sympathy,

  123. I just lost my Hailie girl almost two months ago. She started having seizures and at age 12 it was too much for her little heart to handle. She was an 8lb. toy poodle and I loved her with all my heart. I am sad every day and I feel I am not getting over this. She had to be put to sleep and my fiancé was with her. I went too, said goodbye to her, but had trouble letting her go. I got very dizzy, I couldn’t breathe and I felt faint. The people in the vet’s office gave me water but I felt like I was going to die. I miss her! I want her back. I don’t know what to do. I’ve tried everything. Nothing is helping me. I know I am not alone but I feel I am because I was the only one who had Hailie. I was her mommy for 12 years. I feel I let her down. She trusted me. I am broken. What to do??? My poor Hailie girl. My little Booka. :(

  124. Thank you for sharing about you’re pet’s death here. My heart goes out to you, and I know your experience will help others cope with their loss.

    Dear Sandy,

    It sounds like it’s affecting you in a profound way. There’s something about a pet’s death that can trigger deeper, more emotional issues about grief, pain, or loss. I don’t know why your Aggie’s death is having such a major effect on your life, but I do encourage you to talk to a counselor.

    It’s normal to grieve a dog’s death, but when a reaction is this extreme, there might be something else going on. I think it would be very healthy and good for you to talk to a counselor about your response to your dog’s death.

    Your kids may surprise you with their resilience. Kids sometimes cope with death easier than adults; they seem to be able to flow with it a bit better. I suppose it depends on how the adults are coping, though.

    Will you call a counselor, and talk it through with him or her?


  125. We got “Ajay” about 9 years ago when he was just a puppy. I had never had a dog growing up and my wife and I never felt we could have one in our working years since we felt leaving a dog alone most of the day while we worked would not be right. But when I went into semi-retirement a decade ago, we started to talk about getting one.

    The plan was to go to a bunch of venues to look at a whole bunch of dogs and get an idea of what we might want. Didn’t quite work out that way. We went to our first one – a rescue dog event run by the local animal shelter – and met Ajay. Ten minutes later, he was in the back of our car going home.

    Ajay was a mixed breed about 8 months old at that time. We learned he was probably a mixture of Sheppard, Doberman, and maybe some Rottweiler.

    Ajay always looked younger that he actual age. Many persons were amazed that he was over 9 years old, thinking he was still more of a puppy. In fact the nickname we used for him was “puppy.” Even recently, he would often race around the yard a thousand miles an hour and spent hours chasing and treeing squirrels around our wooded property, barking at the tree base for a long time.

    When we traveled we tried to take him along with us whenever possible. He had been to the Canadian Rockies, Seattle, Tucson, Austin, Ft Myers, and many times to northern Michigan. He enjoyed traveling with us in the car. However, there were many trips my wife and I took that we could not take him. For those times we boarded him at the local “Camp Bow-Wow,” a franchise doggie day-care / boarding facility.

    Ajay always displayed a fair amount of separation anxiety when he would be away from us, whether at home alone or at Camp Bow-Wow. He always seemed to want to be with us. Whenever we would drop him off at Camp Bow-Wow, Ajay would initially be excited to go, but could see him on the on-line web cameras waiting by the pen gate alone, hoping he would be picked up soon while the other dogs had fun playing. It was always hard for me to drop him off there knowing this was the case.

    Dave, the franchise owner, was very understanding, knowing Ajay had this separation anxiety condition and would take Ajay for rides in his car often during long boarding stays just to give Ajay a break.

    My wife and I took a Caribbean Cruise the week of March 31. We dropped Ajay off at Camp Bow-Wow on Mar 29, driving to our departure city of New Orleans. We had no access to voicemail or email until April 7.

    April 7 was the worst day of my life. When the cruise ended that morning in New Orleans I received a voicemail from our vet that said “Ajay was brought in yesterday, but I am sorry he has died.”

    Dave had noticed Ajay was not doing well on Apr 6 and put him in his car to take him to the vet. Ajay died before he got there. Apparently, he suffered from “bloat” which caused his stomach to “twist” cutting off blood flow to vital organs. We have later learned that this is a condition common to dogs of his breed. We have also learned that STRESS/ANXIETY is something that can enhance this condition.

    I feel so guilty I was not there to comfort him as he died. He was my buddy, my best friend, and he trusted me to always take care of him. I feel so guilty that I took him to a place where his stress and anxiety may have helped kill him.

    My wife and I cried for most of the 16 hour drive back to Michigan. We said goodbye to him at the vet’s office the next morning saying how sorry we were that we were not there to comfort him during his last moments here on earth.

    The decision to put an old pet down is indeed a gut wrenching time, but losing one that is healthy and full of life so suddenly is something I am having trouble dealing with. And being a thousand miles away when it happened is something I feel so guilty about.

    I wish I could tell him:
    “Ajay, I am so sorry I was not there when you died. I hope you were not scared.”
    “Ajay, I miss you so much.”
    “Ajay, you are my buddy, and will always be my buddy.”
    “Ajay, I hope you are now in a happy place, free from your anxiety, free from your scratching, and are playing with a lot of other dogs and chasing a million squirrels.”

    We get his ashes this weekend and plan to spread them around various favorite parts of our property, and keeping a portion to take with us wherever we may live in the future.

    I know that time heals all wounds. But I know this wound is large.

  126. I lost my precious boxer baby Ronnie on the 18/3/13 to cancer. He was just 12 days past his 6th birthday. We first found out he had cancer when he had just turned 3. The tumor was supposed to have been successfully removed but it came back 1 year later. We were told it was in his glands and even with chemo we could only expect 3-6 months but he lived for 2 more years. I cant say i feel grateful for the extra time i got to spend with him because i fell deprived. He was my world and its killing me inside, I cry all the time and feel so depressed. He was the most loving funny and beautiful boy in the world and he was taken from me. I have now gone and rescued a little boxer who has had a terrible start in life, she has been neglected. I thought this would make me feel better, and she is a lovely pup, but all honestly its made me feel worse. I know this little girl needs a lovely home, but all i want is my boy back. He is on my mind every second to the point its un-healthy, i just dont think i will ever get over this.

  127. I have, had, two dogs. I am a married woman with three beautiful children. We got our first dog, Aggie, a Westie five years ago when my youngest was 2 years old. We moved out to the country when Aggie was just one. She loved it out here. We were immediately warned about the danger of coyotes. We always took precautions, never letting her out alone at or after sunset, or before sunrise which was quite a pain in the wintertime but we endured. We got aggie because she was little and relatively clean. A year ago, Harriet came into our lives. She was a stray BEARDED COLLIE! She is completely the opposidte of Aggie – huge and hairy!! The two dogs loved each other and played often! This past Monday, Aggie enjoyed basking in the sun on our driveway. It was a beautiful day. Aggie loves being outside. My husband grilled at 6pm on our deck and doesn’t recall seeing Aggie. We ate dinner at 7pm. A little before 9pm we didn’t see Aggie anywhere. The neighborhood joined in on our search in the dark with flashlights. It has been two days and we know in our hearts that Aggie was taken by coyotes. She was only 13 lbs. We have many acres and our house borders on the woods. I am beyond consoling. I can’t stop crying. I am haunted by Aggie’s last moments, and the fact that I didn’t let her inside. I was home all day Monday as was my husband. My kids seem to be more upset that I am so sad, than the fact that Aggie is gone. I was the primary caregiver and Aggie slept with my husband and I nuzzling with me. Its been two days now, and my husband is getting annoyed with me. He reminded me this morning that it wasn’t a kid, it was just a dog. I can’t stop crying. I realized there have are far greater losses…but I can’t stop. What is wrong with me and what should I tell my kids? I stormed through the woods with a golf club in hand this morning. I have 5 acres as do my 30+neighbors. Everywhere I turn I see my sweet Aggie. Is it harmful for my children 8, 10, 12 to see my so upset. I can’t stop crying and my husband is getting mad at me. Please help. Sandy :(

    1. Sandy,
      Don’t feel guilty or question yourself, you lost a family member not JUST A DOG. Do not listen to anyone when it comes to feelings. You lost a wonderful creature, who you loved and it doesn’t matter if it was an animal, I love animals over most people. It is normal to grieve and to feel lost because you loved your pet so much.

  128. I am glad to find this website. It has been so painful since the death of my beloved dog Saturday morning. I had her for almost fifteen years. I have never had a dog with such a wonderful loving temperament. She was my friend, truly my companion. I have never had the the death of a pet to affect me so. It is so painful. They are not meant to live forever and I treasure the years I had with her. But it does not lessen this immediate huge sense of loss in my life. I know letting her go was the best thing for her, but I’d give anything to hold her one more time.

  129. My husband ran over our dog this morning by mistake. He was only a year and a half old. I feel so guilty because we moved out to the country and we were letting him run around free outside, which he loved…but I wish I would have been more dilagent about getting him inside or having something in place outside for him that would be safer for him. I miss him so much and am so torn up inside over this. I feel like old age would bring me some comfort, but the fact that he was so young just makes it that much harder. The letter I wrote to my boy Petey is on my blog.

  130. We just learned Sat our 6 year old Golden has Osteosarcomia. There is only the hope of a year survival time if we opt to amputate her leg. I know this type of cancer is very painful and cannot imagine putting her through that surgery. So we will cherish her for the time we have left, it is the most gut wrenching decision ever! Thank you for your blog, I will be thinking of her waiting for me, that’s really such a great thought !

  131. Thank you for sharing about your pet’s death. My heart breaks for you; I know how hard it is to survive this type of loss. It’s awful.

  132. Jen, Oct. 2012
    Is the burden in your heart a bit better now? Two days ago I put my beloved Callie cat down too, and like you I question myself. I miss her terribly and cry all the time, and feel like I am surrounded by a grey shroud. It is an atrocious time.

  133. i just lost my dog she was a mixed breed she was showing all the sighns of parvo she started getting sick sat morning by sunday i knew that she was gonna die i brought her to the vet they said it was gonna be about 800 dollars for her to stay there so i worked out a plan where i can treat her from home well im sad to say we didnt make it home with her she died in my arms on the way home from the vet and i dont think ill ever get over it she was my best friend and a good dog she was only 7 months old and i cant stop crying every time someone says her name or i think of her or i see something that belonged to her i just want to curl up and cry this isnt fun at all i hate this feeling

  134. I feel like I am at the lowest point in my life. My 12 year old Maltese, chuckle was my best friend. He was always there for me, just his presence could make me feel happy and relaxed. 4 days ago he was jumping around and barking and running in the yard…then all of a sudden he was lethargic and limp. We took him to our vet who said his immune system was attacking his red blood cells, and the little guy needed an immediate blood transfusion. We rushed him to the emergency vet who did the procedure without even taking to us and finding out his medical history (he was epileptic, but it was under control). He pulled through and things were looking good, but suddenly he took a turn and a blood clot went into his brain…the vet through so much science verbiage at us it was difficult to know what was even happening, but when I saw him I knew it was over. He died in my moms arms before they could even give him the needle. It’s so awful, I just feel like I was punched in the gut, my friend since 4th grade (I’m now 23) is gone and I hate it.

  135. My husband and I lost our only child, Moon, our 2 and a 1/2 years old English Cocker Spaniel beauty, 10 days ago – on 04 Nov 12. She fell sick on 1st nov and was gone on 4th Nov. We didnt get much reaction time, and not sure if the vet gave her the right medicines. Our vet hadn’t given us any notice on her death, and she died just all of a sudden. I am not able to get out of the denial stage, i am not able to sleep and i wake up with a heavy head with no will to get up and start the day. My family doesn’t really understand the pain that i’m experiencing till now. Only my husband and I know what we are going through. Each and every response,reaction , expression of her face..are crossing my mind all the time, and i feel like she is watching us over. I’ m so so sorry Moon…u loved your life so much and loved ur mommy and daddy so much and wanted to be with them all the time, and i couldn’t give you a longer life. We love u more than anything else in this world. Your selflessness in giving us love has left us blank about our future lives without you baby…hope you are happier than you were with us..wherever you are my baby…my Moon…mun mun

  136. Dear Nancy,

    I’m sorry you lost your husband and your cat in such a short time period. It’s so difficult saying good-bye to our loved ones. I’m glad you’re sharing your home with other creatures who need it – those new cats will be so grateful to be with you!

    I think you can still honour Sparky, even though new cats have moved in. You’ll always have Sparky in your heart, mind, and soul — and you’re spreading your love to other cats. I think Sparky would approve wholeheartedly. After all, you’re taking care of his kin — and he knows he’ll always be number one in your heart.


  137. On August 9, my husband passed away. On November 9th we had to put our beloved Sparky to sleep. Sparky was an 18 1/2 year old tabby cat we got from the Humane Society when he was 7 months old. He always slept with me and loved playing with our daughter. He was harness trained and spent many hours outside with us. I am now going through all the stages of grief again and just don’t know how many times I can cope with this. I have been offerred 2 2yr. old cats all fixed, declawed, shots etc. free as the man wants them to go to a good home where they will have lots of love as he has started his own business and not home much. I feel guilty not honouring Sparky longer, but they are available now and I know I need their comfort.

  138. Thank you for this article. I’ve lost a few of my animal family members before, but I’m having a terrible time dealing with the recent loss of my cat. Tigger was 16 1/2 years old and I’ve had him since I was 5 years old. He was my very best friend and I love him more than anyone or anything. He passed away at our home on 11/7 from old age. He wasn’t sick, but had been sleeping more and acting very tired. Right now, I don’t feel like I’ll ever be okay again.

  139. We lost our precious Bailey, a Yorkiepoo, who we only had for 2 years. Bailey was our little girl perfect in every way. My husband and I are grieving her and having a hard time with it. She loved being free but she died tragically in front of me. Please pray for me and I will pray for your loss.

  140. I have what I think is the best dog in the world. Lucky, she is a 13 yr old Sheltie-Collie mix and currently she has congestive heart failure and her kidneys are shutting down. I am going to have to let her go but it is soo hard to think of my life without her. I got her from the humane society when I moved to Nashville. She was living with a couple in an apartment that could not keep her because it was against their contract and so they brought her in. She had some puppies but they were never found. From the moment I saw her I fell in love, she is so sweet! For the last 12 years she has been there when I had great days (when I met and married my wife) and through the worst days of my life (my dad passing away). She is so loving and would do everything she could to make me happy and now I can see the pain she is in and it KILLS me. I have cried more than enough and I just don’t know what’s going to happen when she is actually gone. We have another pup, Lucey, and she can see that Lucky is not doing well and she has began to grieve. I feel so sick that I am about to lose my best friend and and I am concerned for Lucey and how it will affect her once Lucky passes on to be with my dad. Have any of you that have lost a beloved pet actually gone in and stayed while they were put down? I am considering it as I want to be the last one she sees before she goes to heaven but then I think that it will pain me to see her drift off and not wake up again. Thank you in advance for your replies…. I Love you Lucky Bull!!!!!!!!!

  141. Just reading all thoes story it is starting to help me. Just today Nov 3/0212 we had to put our dog down hector he was 12yrs old. Hector is a westie white. It all started with a bad cough,took him to vet had to leave him over night. Next day the vet phone and said he had tumours and he only had two weeks,but he lasted another two months. Hector was such a great dog part of the family. He would all ways meet us at the door when we came home. One thing he didn’t like us going out,we had put a lot of things up. Right now this is very hard for me too write and it is going to take time to get over it. I will miss Hector every day. I keep looking for him.

  142. Unfortunately we had to let go of our 11 year old springer spaniel Roxi a few days ago. We got her when i was going through an extremely bad run of events in my life, when every day seemed to bring more heartache onto the family. My loving wife decided to drag me along to see Roxi to try and to get me out of the house and get me back to full health. Well the minute I walked through that door to see her, she bounded round the corner and jumped up on me. Love at first sight, I couldnt stop smiling “When can we take her” I asked the lady.”Now” was her reply. Within weeks i was back at work and probably the happiest i had been for a year. I have been dreading this day all year but Hopefully I have helped you now Roxie, as much as you have helped me.I know you will be happy once more doing doggy circles in heaven. Thank you my loyal companion. Till we meet again xxx

  143. I just put my kitty down yesterday. It is by far the hardest thing I have ever had to do. She was sick on the inside, but acted and looked fine on the outside. I always question myself if I did the right thing or not. I feel like I let her down. I miss her so much. She was the most cuddly cat,who NEVER left my side. She was the first thing I saw in the morning and the last when I went to bed at night. I am just heartbroken. I don’t have any children of my own…just my kitties. I still have her sister, but she wants no part of me. All I want to do is grab and hold and pet and kiss her, and she wants no part of it, which makes this even harder. I want to show her love, and she just runs away from me. Should have I tried everything in my power to save her? Does she hate me? Will I see her again? Is she happy? Will this hurt ever go away?

  144. to all of you who have lost your pet. We lost Duchess our beloved dog who we had for over 12 yrs. she died of heart failure Aug 18-12. I still miss her & at times I think of her & dream of her. I have prayed & cried & I do believe the Lord takes our pets to Him. I am very sorry for all your losses, I hurt with you. We now have Lucy, that we got at the pound. She is not Duchess, another dog will not take Duchess’s place but Lucy is filling that void & she needed love & a home. Let yourself grieve you have lost a “loved” one. Remember you are only human & we all make mistakes,I pray your hearts will be healed from your lost. God bless you & please check your local pound, there are a lot of animals that need our love. Paula

  145. I lost my precious sweet innocent 9 year old pug, Andy, October 12,2012. He was attacked and killed in my 6foot high fenced in back yard. He was outside literally less than5 minutes. The images are haunting me, I’m sobbing uncontrollably and just want the pain to stop. I’ve never felt a hurting pain like this one before. Can someone who has had their baby taken from them offer me a few words of advice to get me through this? I just want to get through this so I can look back and not be haunted, but comforted on the fact I had him as long as I did. I’m just not ready to be optimistic yet. I’m still wanting to be angry and sad and mad. Anything would help as long as its a step forward and nothing hateful or mean. Thank you to anyone taking the time to read and respond. Xoxo

  146. I caused my beloved cat’s death because I didn’t give him his antibiotics for renal failure. I just want to die and be with him now. I can’t stand myself for what I did.

    I tried to save him with liquids, we didn’t really know if he had an infection as the doc did not do a blood test for that. He supposedly had renal failure with very high numbers, but that renal failure could have been form an infection!

    I asked to the antibiotics myself as the doctor did not offer it. Can you believe this? Then I thought the antibiotics might harm his kidney’s even more, so did not give them.

    He seemed to rally on the liquids at first, but then went downhill. At the end they think he died of an underlying infection. Why did the vet not know he had an infection until he died? And how can I live with myself? I am just beside myself over this horrifying outcome for my dear little pet.

  147. I would just like to add a follow up on my story, time does help so much, at first it is all u think about. Every morning I awoke and the first thing I thought was Shadow is gone but it is 3 weeks today and I am still sad and of course miss him so much but have accepted that he is now gone and in heaven waiting for me. Things my family and I did was make photo albems of Shadow and we all have him as our cover pic on our computers, it just helps I don’t know why. I also found that talking about him helped both my family and me and not keep it bottoled up. At first I couldn’t even consider ever getting another dog but now I understand that Shadow would not want us to live in the past and to move on. God made us to take chances and give our heart and love each other and our pets not to just never love another dog because of the loss of one that was beloved. Yes it will be a big chance but for the life and love that my Shadow gave me I wouldn’t trade it for the world. I remember him now as he was healthy and happy his whole life execpt the last couple of months that he was sick. I refuse to feel any guilt as I know I took the best of care of him and loved him fiercly. I hope this helps other people that have lost their pets

  148. My 18 yr old kitty is being put to sleep tomorrow morning and I feel so numb and so sad

    Bo has been my companion and such a great handsome orange tabby kitty for the last 18 yrs it is hard to say goodbye.

    His kidney’s have failed and he is blind now, he is suffering badly and I know I am doing the right thing but I can’t imagine my life without him

    I am trying to remember all of the good and crazy times, I have had him since he was 12 weeks old and I keep telling myself logically I am doing the right thing since he is in so much pain but my heart
    hurts and I don’t know how to stop it from hurting

    Thanks fr letting me express my sorrow

  149. My miniature poodle died sadly two weeks ago, he lived an incredible life, the best life a dog can ask for and certainly the best companion a person could ever have had, its so painful realizing that this individual is forever gone and that there will never be anyone like him again. For 9 years he led a near perfect life with a near perfect health, at least as much as we all witnessed, even on the last day before he got gravely ill he still had the energy of a newborn puppy and barely showed any signs of slowing down. He fell ill suddenly under circumstances that may never be 100% clear, and in a 48 hour time period he was in and out of the hospital 3 times, they did what they needed, drugged him heavily, and as he began showing slow but sure signs of improvement things went downhill from there and upon his final visit to the hospital he died of internal bleeding.

    The most painful part for me that had me in tears for the first time in a long while is the fact that all he ever did was give and receive love his whole life, and that he absolutely did not deserve the violent and painful ending he endured for 2 days. For the first couple of days following his passing, I could not come to terms with why mother nature had to be so cruel to even its purest of inhabitants and souls, and began to blindly question whether his beautiful life was really all worth it if it meant such an horrible fate, one cannot possibly take a moment to clearly reflect on his/her life when in such agony. The most difficult part for me was to prepare mentally and emotionally for his passing before it happened, upon realizing that his condition took a sharp turn for the worse I had already felt that he probably wouldnt make it without a great miracle, and as my brother and I gently carried him into our parents car, I leaned in to say my goodbyes and then continued to look into the window at him as his eyes locked with mine until the car drove away and out of sight. Watching him suffer for two days like that was painful, but I maintained my faith in his recovery while he was showing signs for it, but when things worsened and reality appeared to severely outweigh my faith and hope, I had to make the tough decision to not resist or get deseparate in the hopes of fulfilling my wishes and subsequently sinking myself into a deep depression, after all this is the way of the world, everyone dies. At that moment, the main thing I wanted for him was to not suffer anymore. Of course nobody in my family, myself included, could sleep peacefully that night, but the following day I prepared a family BBQ and we ate and drank to his memory.

    I’ve been able to move on with my life, of course not a day goes by without me thinking about him, and every time I get home I still find myself anticipating him to come and greet me at the door, or have him lay on me when I take my nap on the couch, or see him follow my mom everywhere she goes. Slowly but surely I know that the memory of his agony will fade and I will only remember him for the beauty that he was, and I know that this is what he would like to have seen from everyone of us, to see us all live our lives to the fullest. Rest in peace Lucky.

  150. Thank you all for your experiences. They really help. Duncan was the best friend I had in life, a 12 year-old yellow Lab who still thought he was 5. Three days ago we made the difficult decision to let him go after battling cancer for 18 months. It hardly seemed to affect him at all until two days before the end. He had trouble getting up without my help and I could tell by the heavy panting and the look in his eyes that he was in pain. We took him to the vet that day and he had trouble moving his back legs, and after returning to the exam room following x-rays, he lay on the floor and didn’t want to move, even when offered the promise of ice cream, his favorite. We had to make the painful decision so suddenly, and since then I can’t stop the tears, even as I write this. I can’t believe that my friend won’t wake me up anymore with his mouth full of socks or demand I supply him with chewsticks during the most interesting part of a movie, or chase a frisbee across a field and snatch it in his mouth. We had a private cremation and plan on scattering some of his ashes on his favorite playspots when we receive. I hope this will somehow lead to healing. Thanks for letting me vent.

  151. My sweet little silkie terrier Shadow died yesterday evening, he was diagnosed with an enlarged heart and we had him on medicine and thought he would be okay. I got home from work and could see how sick he had gotten so my 15 year old daughter and me was on the way to the vet and we didn’t get 5 miles down the road and he died in her lap. It was horriable and she was screaming and I pulled over and even tried to do cpr on him but he was just gone. He was only 10 years old. I just don’t know how I will be able to go on without him. My husband and all three of my children are devistated and I just can’t stop crying. You see his name said it all he was my little shadow every step I took he was right there beside me. We never went anywhere without him he even went with us on vacation. How am I ever going to get over this???

  152. Buck was the best dog I ever had. He was a big Golden Retriever and as playful at age nine (when he died) as he was when I got him, at about age 2.
    Buck was diagnosed with congestive heart failure and I elected to euthanize him so as to avoid further suffering for my friend.
    It was one hell of a tough choice; a letter from the veterinarian has helped me a great deal.
    I got Buck’s ashes today, and it is hard for me to believe that that is all I’ll ever see of my beautiful boy again.
    I just wish that I could hold him one more time.

  153. Hi,
    On Sunday, at 5:15pm, my little Puppy-Girl, Nancy died in my arms. In November she’d have turned 13. She was so precious to me, and she suffered long and hard before her passing. I’m trying to cope, but I’m not doing a good job of it. The grief is tearing me up inside. I’ve looked for understanding and support and found none. People seem to dismiss it, like I shouldn’t be mourning…she was just a dog. That attitude makes it even harder for me. I also have nothing of her’s to hold onto…nothing tangible – no blanket, no toy, nothing. She was buried with her blanket, and she didn’t have toys because she no longer played as she once had. The cataracts made it difficult for her to see properly. I know where she’s buried – and I want to fetch her, hold her, talk to her…she was always so eager to do what I wanted that I think that maybe, if I make her see that I’m not OK with her death, she’ll return. It’s stupid, it’s irrational, it makes no sense…I know this. I can’t let go.

    Scott…I get it. My sincerest (I mean that by the way) sympathies to you and your wife.

    In fact, my sincerest sympathies to everyone who has lost an animal. Isn’t it weird, wonderful, amazing, special, heartwarming, incredible, awesome, and miraculous? This bond that we can share with animals? Think about it, in their natural habitat and lives they don’t do the things that they do when they’re with us. They don’t grab each other, hug each other, kiss each other…but we grab them, hug them, kiss them, tease them, play with them, LOVE them…and they understand and respond in kind.

    My heart goes out to each of you who are feeling the pain and loss that I’m feeling right now. Together we can know that we’re not pariahs, that what we feel is REAL! We ARE NOT ridiculous!

  154. I had a three year old dog,well she started having seizures last night, they started around 9pm. My dad had to lay downstairs with her. she started looking her balance. From 9 last night to 10 ish maybe a little earlier she had 17 seizures. My dad took her for a shot over the mountain from where i live. it was about 10:30 when my gram and my dad took her back over the moutain. there was nothing they could do so they had to put her down. it’s sad and to think she was only three.
    Sadie 12/24/08-8/19/12

  155. To the owner of ‘lucky’ the 3 legged cat…
    Im so sorry for your loss of lucky, but he was indeed ‘lucky’ to have an owner who cared enough to end his suffering! Thoughts are with you

  156. Hi Scott firstly im so sorry for the loss of Beau but as hard as i know it is, plz don’t feel any guilt! As loving pet owners we all have to make very hard decisions and it is the ultimate, selfless kindest action you can ever do for your wonderful Beau and that was to end his pain and suffering! He’s happy now and i truly believe our beloved pets spirits stay with us forever! You have done the right thing by beau it would have been cruel and selfish to watch him suffer, just because you couldn’t bare to let him go, so when you think of him cry a little, laugh a little and when you get his ashes just try and remember he loved you all too and he’ll be with you forever! God bless little Beau and your loving family

  157. I recently had to put to sleep my 12 plus year old tea cup pom. We had him since he was 7 weeks old. We recently had him to the vet and was sruggling but the next day he was great again. I recieved a call from my wife and she indicated she was back at the vet with Beau. The vet gaves us his best ideas but was stunned at his turn in health. Unsure what to do we made a decesion to have him put to sleep. My wife and daughter could not stay but I did. I talked to him for 10 minutes, how do you say I luv ya in 10 minutes? Many ways I found out. I was devastated I drove home and hung my wife and daughter but the house feels empty. This was August 15, 2012 and I find myself looking at his bowls and blanket and bed and trying to recall the fun times we have had. The quietness and his nightime routines are gone forever.. My wife is struggling even more. She broke down today in my arms as my daughter headed back to college. I tried to fill time discussing this and took her for icecream, wanna Beaus favorite treats. Many pictures have been looked at but only hoping things get better in time. We feel guilt, anger, and more importanly loneliness. The house is to quite..Please advise as our little guy meant the world to us.. I did have a private cremation and an urn but have not recieved his remains yet. My wife and I feel that when I have that and bring him home more healing will occur. She feels like we left him there to pass, once again guilt.. Thanks for letting me express my feeling and sorrow and look forward to less grief..

  158. living in silence today--deep sadness

    My gentle, sweet, loving, 3 legged cat passed away last night. His name is Lucky. He was diagnosed with a stomach tumor 3 weeks ago. It was very aggressive. As always, he looked me in the eyes and offered his calming, deep chested purr. His selfless love was a daily gift to me. The great depth of our bond gave me smiles, joy and strength.
    I am so proud of you. Thank you, Lucky.

  159. Hi ‘grief stricken’ im so sorry for the loss of ghosty! Sounds a beautiful kitty! I lost my kitty on the 6th of June he was run over, tinky was his name 14yr old tabby that adopted us rather like your ghosty! He was beautiful too. Its so hard isn’t it hun? But honestly the pain gets a little easier as the time goes by! I still cry for my first cat over 30 yrs ago, but that’s because we cared and loved them so much!! You have to grieve to enable the healing process to start and soon you’ll be able to think of ghosty with a smile and just a few tears but there’s no rush huni everyone is different! Hold his pictures close and talk to him. He’s at peace now no more pain he’s probably lying in the shade under a big old tree with my tinky and all my other kitties that have passed over the yrs or chasing butterflies but he’ll hear you when you speak to him! Sending you my love and thinking of you Caroline xx

  160. Shannon im so sorry for your loss of your puppy! I know it hurts so much losing an animal you love with all your heart I’ve been there so many times huni and id like to say it gets easier, but it doesn’t!
    Im also glad you were able to be with maia when she went to sleep, i was with all my animals too its so comforting to know, that they know your there with them to the end. what you need to remember huni is she was suffering and you loved her so much that you did the kindest thing possible and helped take away her pain-she will know why you did this, she will understand and love you even more!! Its so hard for you because you miss her but your such a lovely kind person not to allow her to suffer and you tried so hard to help her didn’t you, so you never need to feel guilty EVER!!!
    you were lucky to have had her but she was even luckier to have had you as her mom!!
    In time, tears won’t flow so often, they’ll still flow, mine still do too, but you’ll remember happier times with laughter and you ll feel at peace because maia is at peace!!
    Let yourself grieve huni, its natural and healing in a strange way, and allow yourself to think of getting another pup, in maia s memory as you’ll be able to tell the new pup all about your beautiful maia and that helps so much too!!
    Take care huni much love and im thinking of you. Caroline xx

  161. I had to have my gorgeous black cat ghosty euthanised yesterday morning. He had quickly developed a large tumour in his stomach (it had grown rapidly over a course of weeks) and I am absolutely devastated.

    He was the most loving friendly animal I have ever come across who loved to have his belly scratched, would lie in his back and drool cos he was so relaxed!!

    I miss him so much and have spent the whole day sobbing, Inbetween looking at pictures and still have all his things, i think I’ll hold onto them for a bit longer, not ready to let go just yet.

    We never adopted ghosty, he just turned up at out door one cold, wet november evening 9 years ago and never left!!! He loved to go out during the day, but always came back to us at night. Never new how old he was, think he was maybe 4 or 5 when he moved in, wet, bedraggled and covered in fleas. He will always be close to my heart and I will never stop loving him.

  162. I feel that I need to share my story. My fiancé and I had a 5 month old English mastiff girl. She was the center of our world. Everyone who met her fell in love immediately. One day Maia started acting lethargic and down in the dumps. He next morning she collapsed and couldn’t stand or walk. She had gone to the vet over the next two days two times and the vet couldn’t find a single thing wrong. She then was taken to he emergency vet number one where she stayed. She could not sit up stand walk or hold her head up. We went to a neuro specialist because nobody there knew either. They diagnosed her with myasthenia gravis. A neuro muscular disease. They said her prognosis was grave and even with 7000 dollars in treatment se probably wouldn’t recover. Since she was shaking constantly and wouldn’t eat or drink due to mega esophagus and was limp with no muscle tone we decided to euthanize. I held her in my arms and she lifted her head and put it on my shoulders while it happened. I whispered in er ear that we love her and called her nicknames we always used. I felt her heart stop. It was helpful to be holding her. This was 3 days ago and I haven’t stopped crying. My heart is totally broken. Im afraid I’ll never feel better. I miss my moosie moose Maia. Baby puppy.

  163. Dear Teresa,

    I’m so sorry that your cat died, and that you feel so much guilt about leaving her. You have to remember you didn’t do anything wrong – when you left your cat, you didn’t know that she was on the brink of kidney failure! The veterinarian said not to worry, that there was nothing to worry about.

    Your cat may have ended up that way, even if you hadn’t left her. She was at the end of her life – she was 19 years old – and her kidneys couldn’t have lasted forever. Even if you were with her that week, her life may not have gone on longer. The person who was watching her didn’t know that her kidneys were failing. She probably just thought your cat wasn’t eating much for other reasons – maybe it was the way she was before, or maybe she was missing you.

    I’m not defending the person who watched her. It’s totally understandable that you feel anger and disappointment, because she was supposed to be taking care of your cat! I’m just trying to say that maybe this was the natural end of your cat’s kidneys and life, no matter who was taking care of her.

    I hope you’re able to accept her death, and let her go. I hope you can remember her with love and joy, not pain and sadness. I hope you know that your cat is in a better place because she’s not suffering anymore. She’s at peace – maybe even chasing mice and strings, and enjoying lots of cat treats!

    For me, the best way to cope with a pet’s death is to picture her happier and healthier on the other side than she ever was on earth.

    And, I always find a new cat or dog to love. I will never forget the dogs and cats I loved and lost, but I will always have a place in my home for an animal who needs love.


  164. Thank you so much Laurie. I really appreciate your good advice and kind words. Your website is amazing and very comforting to all of us.

  165. Dear Stephanie,

    What a terrible experience – I am so sorry for you and your boys. Coping with your pet’s death is difficult at any time, but it’s even worse when you feel responsible.

    It’s important to remember that it was an ACCIDENT. You would never hurt your cat – you didn’t do anything wrong! Your poor kitty was in the wrong place at the wrong time. It’s tragic and heartbreaking, and it will take time to heal from the experience.

    I have written about coping with guilt when you feel you caused your pet’s death — that articles has over 100 comments, because we all feel guilty about our pets dying! I know running over your cat is much more difficult to deal with than having to put your pet to sleep – there’s more guilt and responsibility.

    I hope this article helps.

    When You Caused Your Pet’s Death

    Please keep reminding yourself that your cat was in the wrong place at the wrong time. You couldn’t have done anything to prevent the accident – it wasn’t in your control.

    I also wrote an article on helping kids cope with their pet’s death:

    Helping Kids Cope With Pet Loss

    I hope this helps – I wish I could do more! If you and your kids are overwhelmed with grief and guilt, please talk to a counselor. Even if you don’t feel overwhelmed, maybe you should have a session with someone, to process your feelings?


  166. My cat Forrest, was the best cat in the world. I had her for 19 years and she was my only pet. She started getting sick in February when she was diagnosed with hypothyroidism. She had lost a little weight, but was still eating and enjoying life. In June she was losing weight again and was down to 5 pounds- not eating much. One of her kidney tests was elevated, but the doctor said not to worry too much. I went away for a week in July and when I returned she could barely walk, was blind, and was not eating at all.

    I took her to the vet and she was on IV’s for 2 days, but he said she was in end stage kidney failure and there was nothing left to do.

    I have such intense guilt for leaving her when she was sick, but I didn’t know. She seemed okay when I left.

    I have so much anger towards the person who was watching her. She told me that my cat didn’t seem to be eating much, but she never made me understand that she was dying. I could have come home and taken her to the vet.

    I keep thinking that it would have made a difference but I do not know because I am not a doctor. She continued to worsen when I took her to the vet when I got home but would a day earlier have made a difference?

    In the end, she would only walk one or two steps before lying down. I would put her in the litter box since she was still using it and she would just lay down. She didn’t react at all to any affection from me and seemed to be suffering so much.

    It has been three weeks and I can’t stand being at my house because it is so empty. I can’t sleep and I can’t stop crying.

    I have never felt this much heartache and pain.

    If you could help me out I would really appreciate it. I am so sad.

  167. Hello, I am having a hard time dealing with the loss of my pet cat. I had her for 16 years and she was the best cat ever. I recently came home from work and ran her over on the drive way. She was the color white, the same as my driveway and she blended in. I did not see her, the sun was bright and by the time I realized what happened I tried to back my car up but she was already dead. My two boys were with me in the car and did not see it but are completely devastated just like I am. I can’t get the vision of my poor cat out of my head and I feel totally responsible for her death. I know it was an accident, but I can’t stop from blaming myself. How do I move on and not have that vision of her in my head every second? Thanks for your help.

  168. Dear Tina,

    Thank you so much for your comment, and for coming back a year after you said good-bye to Connor. I’m so glad you found this article helpful.

    And, I hope my 2 year old terrier lives to be as old as Connor! It’s really, really hot in Vancouver right now, and my dog is wilting in the heat. It’s like she’s 10, not 2! So every day I’m reminded that she won’t be with us forever, and I cherish every minute. Your experience reminds me how precious life is.


  169. Dear Laurie, I want to say thank you for your wonderful website, and to tell you that I first left my very sad message 1 year ago today.I had Connor, my precious golden retriever put to sleep, just 7 weeks off his 15th birthday. Well,where has that year gone. I still think about him every single day, I haven’t replaced him with another dog, I don’t think I ever will.I am so glad I found your site, it helped me a great deal to cope with my loss, god bless. Tina from South Wales UK.x

  170. 29-7-12 I lost the love of my life junior
    Im still in shock and devestated about her loss
    I love you princess and I will never forget you

  171. Matt, you made me cry, I know how you feel but you put it into words so perfectly, ” I will forever love him for allowing me to become so close.” I miss my Myah everyday, it does get easier but I still do cry for her, she allowed me to be so close, like no human ever could and I never realized what exactly it was until you said it, thank you, god bless

  172. God bless you my darlings …tinky, sweepy , sooty, misty, e.t, tiger, o’malley, duchess , mini, minou, bruno , Peggy, lizzie, daisy, and riggs mommy and daddy misses each and everyone of you so much…1974 -2012 xxxxxxxxxxxxx will never forget any of you…ever!!

  173. Aww im so sorry to hear about all your losses everyone :'( phyllis9, George and Matt f. I know what a difficult time it is for each of you and i still cry for my tinky too!! The pain of losing our ‘best friend’ is indescribable and sometimes other ppls words are no comfort to begin with as its still so raw, so this may not help you just at the moment but please remember you’re not alone! So much is said about time being a great healer, which deep down we know is true, but nothing really helps at this precise moment in time does it :-( my only way of coping is remembering my tinky was suffering and now he is at peace with his brothers and sisters and newly found friends and id like to think of them all at the ‘rainbow bridge’…where the sun never stops shining and they play in the grass chasing butterflies or they all curl up together under the shade of a tree for a nap. Nothing will ever hurt them again and they’re waiting…for me, one day to join them…but they’re very happy and safe….i have to believe this to get through and i do!!! I close my eyes and i imagine the scene and i see them all playing… cats, dogs, rabbits, pet rats etc altogether…. i call their names and they stop at the bridge to look and they see my face and i see them…i tell them i love them and that they look wonderful playing together…then they’re gone…back to the long grass having fun!! :-)
    Im not mad…its how i cope and it helps me right now! When you’re ready, you try n imagine the scene too…its actually very comforting :-):-):-) love to you all phyllis9 George and Matt f xxx keep in touch plz xxx

  174. My 7 year old bulldog Rambo died yesterday. He had battled many health issues over the years. He had his spleen removed after it wrapped around his pancras last october. He survived the surgery and recovered fully for a few months before becoming very weak. He was an uncondtional best friend who’s only fault was maybe loving me too much. It is hard to imagine how I will move on without him. He was such an integral part of our lives and daily happiness. I hope that one day I can truly miss him for the memories and not miss him for selfish reasons.

    He seemed to hold on yesterday until I could be with him and he died in my arms of heart failure. I’ve never been so close to an animal and I will forever love him for allowing me to become so close.

  175. smudge had too be put too sleep – he was 20 years old and my mate. he loved my wife but allways came to me. He was suffering – took himto vets.Injection,bought home, dug his grave buried Him in a shroud. goy a purple lavender plant too put on his grave, gonna cry tommorrow when I plant it.

  176. I had my 14 1/2 year old rhodesian ridgeback who was 90# put to sleep yesterday. I cannot hardly breathe, the lump in my throat is continual. He could no longer get up even with meds without pain or exhaustion. I cannot stand not having him as he was my last pet and missing his love and my caring for him is unbearable. Sobbing uncontrollable at times.

  177. My dear pamela Chan, Thankyou so much for your kind words. I will write a memorial for him thank you very much for the link. God bless you pamela i was so much in shock yesterday and today im just missing my tinky with all my heart. Thanks again luv Caroline xxx

  178. Dear Caroline wilkes
    My heart feel the pain after reading about your cat. I’m feel sad & very sorry to hear that. I can understand the intense pain & grief you are going through now because I lost my deeply loved dog to heart failure unexpectedly on 22 April this year. Just let yourself cry out & mourn for your cat. You will feel slightly better. You will certainlly miss his presence. Only time can slowly heal your pain. Your beloved cat is now resting in peace in heaven & his body is whole again. While mourning for him, you may want to write a memorial about him. Here’s the link where you can put up his memorial:

  179. Hi again, i just need to put my thoughts down as its now 03.40 and no ones awake for me to talk too but how do i go to bed when tinky always slept on my leg or across my tummy? Im just so devastated losing my sweet kitty :'( can’t deal with how or why its happened. He was 14 yrs old but still like a kitten!!!! My darling tinky your with sooty and sweep now but you should be still with me! Love you so much tinky and no amount of tears can bring you back otherwise you’d be here! Love you cheeky minky xxxxx

  180. Hi,
    tonight, 6/6/2012 I’ve had to have my beautiful tabby cat, tinky put to sleep. I found him crying in pain on my next door neighbours path apparently he’d been run over but tried to claw his way home! Im devastated and struggling to come to terms with his death as my other cats were put to sleep because of either old age or ill health, but this is different. He was outside suffering but i don’t know for how long :'( until i heard him when i went to put rubbish out
    plz someone say something anything that will help me cos i try to think of him out of pain and at peace but my mind won’t switch off seeing him in agony and calling me to help him. god bless you my little tinky i love and miss you so much and im so so sorry i didn’t come straight away. love and miss you so much xxxxxx

  181. This was so sad it made me cry i am so sry to hear about ur dog….my thoughts n prayers are with u i kno how u feel….but what was busta sick from?

  182. here’s a story i wrote for my BEST MATE BUSTA

    There i was- just your ordinary pup getting adopted by a kind average family with jodie(the mum) Steve (the dad) callie ( the daughter and my best friend) and dylan (the strange brother) i sat in the car and i heard mum and dad talking i was listening then they said “lets call him busta.” they gave me a cuddle and callie ( who was just a baby) smiled she liked me- the whole family did!
    We got home and i sniffed out my new surroundings it smelt nice and friendly i felt welcome in this new yard. Jodie came out to see me and then turned to steve and said “what if he hurts callie.” what thats not very nice like i would hurt someone as adorable as callie- but dylan now that’s another story! from that moment on i vowed to never hurt callie or the rest of the family in any way what so ever.
    i remember callie’s first birthday she had some friends over and i got the left overs of the party food but then i got a little bit too excited and accidently hit callie with my tail she started to cry i went up to her and licked her to say “I’m sorry.”
    after the party, she was playing with her ball then she lost it and accused me of having it so she stuck her hand in my mouth and down my throat i didn’t mind i just kept my mouth open.
    a few years later (when callie was 4 and 1 month old) a new family member came in the family- Tegan i went up to tegan and sniffed her.
    not long after she was born, we all moved houses to a place that wasn’t as good as a house as the other one when callie turned 6, she was playing in the back yard when suddenly she fell over i came running to her rescue she laughed when i came up to her she really liked it.
    then we moved again to a much better house one day the girls were dancing on a plastic table and i thought that i might join them i put my two front paws on the table and BOOM we all fell through it tegan and myself were alright but callie had 3 cuts on her- one on her back, one on her leg and one on her hand- oh no i had hurt her again! but callie was not crying she was just laughing but she was a bit embarrassed.
    one month before our tenth birthday ( i shared a birthday with Callie) we welcomed another animal a little Labrador puppy- bindi i sniffed her out and ran around i was sooooo happy to have a friend with me so happy that i ripped up my favorite toy.
    i cuddled up to bindi and then ran around like the day would never end i had a friend.
    4 months before my 13th birthday, i suddenly felt sick i didn’t eat and could hardly walk callie came out and started to cry “remember when we got bindi, and how happy you were, make sure you visit me i am going to be lost without my bussy- i don’t know life with out you busta why do you have to go? i will miss you soo much no bussy no don’t be sick don’t leave me i just wish i could hear you bark just 1 more time, i don’t like seeing you like this bussy i mean you are my twin we have something special.”
    then jodie and steve took me for 1 last car ride we went down to a place where 2 kind ladies put a needle in me the pain went away and then i was gone-away from the family and the world.

  183. I lost my dear Eddie, who was a Jack Russell cross. He was six years old when we had to put him to sleep, the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. Even though I know it was right the decision for him and my young family with children in the long run, I feel guilt and as if I betrayed him in the days he was really sick, looking at me for help. He was my best friend, our first baby, and adapted amazingly when our 2 children came along. He had a great character and was one of those dogs that really loved snuggling and sitting with people. Although we gave him a great and active life, he was more than just a pet. To me personally who had suffered illness during his life, he always lay by side when I was out of action for weeks, he knew I was hurting and loyally comforted me in my darkest days of recovery. When he got sick it rapidly escalated and he went downhill really fast, I struggled to cope watching him like this and even lost over a stone in weight through the stress of it all. It all came to a head one weekend where by the end he couldn’t eat, drink, stand and couldn’t stop vomiting and urinating in his bed. I knew he didn’t deserve this and I knew it was going to get worse, so I made the decision to euthanize him before his suffering got even worse. Even though my wife and I agreed it was the right thing to do, I am now wracked with guilt and can’t stop thinking maybe I could’ve done more for him, maybe if I did this differently it wouldn’t have happened, maybe I made the wrong decision! We miss him so much, and just the silence in the evenings makes my heart sink, I wake up and hope it was all a bad dream and Eddie will jump into my bed with his tail wagging to greet me like he did every morning for 6 years, but he’s not here, he’s gone forever and I struggle to imagine how I will ever get over losing dear Eddie. Someone mentioned getting another dog but they would never compare to him and I know I couldn’t bring myself to do it. Miss you Eddie, the whole family does, there’s a huge whole left in our lives and I think I will carry around this guilt and feeling of betrayal forever. He adored me, followed me everywhere, sniffed under doors if I was in the room until I let him in. The worst thing I miss is seeing him having fun out in the fields on our evening walks, with his ears flying back as he ran up to me after getting sidetracked by a rabbit or something, I miss his little smiling face and I miss him sleeping next to me in evenings when everyone was in bed and it was just me and him unwinding after a stressful day, :( RIP Eddie x

  184. I came to this site because I’m having the hardest time coping with my 5 yr old English Bulldogs sudden death the saturday that just passed (may 26th,2012) I can’t seem to accept that he’s really gone and I can’t get the picture of him suffering out of my head.. Macho choked on his vomit and couldnt breathe.. his tounge turned purple quickly and he passed out, all of this happened so quickly, my dad gave him CPR and tried pumping his stomach and Macho woke up but he couldnt get up nor catch his breath and after 20 minutes of trying to help him catch his breath his body gave up and that was it…. I feel like I’m never going to be happy again and I just wish there was something more we could have done to save his life… Any tips on how to stop remembering his death and feel releaved that he is in a better place? My heart hurts and I just can’t stop crying.. I can’t eat and I dont want to do anything.. I just want to see my beloved dog again.. :(

  185. Thanks that’s really nice but it gets worse my other dog Taylor we had to put him to sleep cause he had a lung infection an he couldn’t breathe but I’m feeling much better now that I no that’s she’s in a better place makes me feel a lot better thanks

  186. To Janet
    It’s heartbreaking to hear that you just lost your sweet little darling to heart failure also. I  feel for your loss. My heart is with you.
    I can’t thank you enough for writing to me to give your kind words of comforts & the sharing with me what you know about the situation.  You know, this writing meant much to me during these moments of my grief & guilt over the the loss of my beloved darling. It’s been 34 days since his unexpected departure.  My heart is still feeling the pain that he is no longer around for me to continue to love him.
    I hope that those words of comforts you have given me will be the therapy to your heart & mind too. 

  187. Laurie Pawlik-Kienlen

    Dear Manisha,

    You did the right thing! Your poor cat had cancer, and it would only have gotten worse. She would’ve suffered so bad if you had let her live the way she was.

    Even though her body isn’t here with you, her soul and spirit is. She’ll always be alive in your memory — and she isn’t suffering from the awful pain that cancer brings.

    Do you think she’d want you to remember her with love and joy, or guilt and pain?

    Sometimes, when you’re coping with your pet’s death, it helps to remember that your pet would want you to remember her with peace, love, and joy. Accept that your poor cat had cancer and it was her time to go. It’s unfair and sad, but her life was meant to be short and sweet.

    May your cat’s soul rest in peace, and may you one day remember her with love, peace, joy, and acceptance. I bet she’s in a better, happier place.


  188. Today I lost my dig Amazon she was a Boxer. I cried a lot and I can’t get I’ve her I need help. She had bone cancer so she had to amputate her leg so she had 3 legs. In her right eye she had cancer caused by her bone cancer and tw cancer from her eye led to her uterus she was bleeding and wasn’t eating for 2 days. She had cancer spots in her abdomen and if we didn’t put her to sleep it would have burst. She’s only 2 and 1/2 years old. If they did surgery the vet said that she wold have probaly died on the vets table. And if she did survive she needed blood because tw cancer had taken all her blood. I’m only 11 and I’m really sad. I lover her so much I will never forget her. Shes very special to me. The first vet that we went to said that it was normal for her to discharge blood. The second said that there was no growth. The third vet was tw one that saw something was wrong with her eye. I need help from someone I’m really upset and sad I can’t stand the thought of her being dead. I just burried her and I can’t think right any more I loved her so much that no words can describe how I feel right now. Please give me advice please.

  189. I lost my Tilly cat today. She had lymphoma. I only had her 3 years after rehoming her. She was the sweetest and most loving friend I could have hoped for. She followed me everywhere I went and was always waiting for me when I got in. She mostly slept on my head or curled up with me. She even followed me into the bathroom for toilet hugs.

    She was a bit on the chubby side and still was a month ago when I noticed one of her pupils was bigger than the other. The vet brushed it off and said it was nothing. 2 weeks later and she had stopped eating. I picked her up and she was as light as a feather. I booked an appointment straight away and the vet was very good. They did tests and X-rays and she was diagnosed with lymphoma and failing kidneys.

    There was nothing that could be done. Tilly continued to follow me around and eat but on Thursday this week it all stopped and she changed. She was obviously fed up, feeling poorly and miserable and I knew it was time. Couldn’t keep her going just for me.. I booked the appointment yesterday and haven’t stopped crying since.

    It was nice to with her at the end, but also so very sad.

    I can’t believe I’ll never see her again. I’m currently not sure what to do with myself. I just want her to jump up on the bed and snuggle under my arm
    Like she used to.

    I hope what they say is true and she is in a better place.

    Miss you with all my heart Tilly.

    Sleep tight

    Love becki xxx

  190. On Tuesday 22nd of may I lost my amazing one of a kind Lhasa apso baby. He was 3 years old due to be 4 in August. On Sunday 20th of may my baby seemed to lack energy and had a little mucus in his waste. I stayed up all night with him drifting in and out of sleep. The next day I took him to the vets, they said he had a bacteria infection in his stomach and gave him 3 injections, a pain killer, anti inflammatory and anti biotic. Toby seemed perkier and even ate some rice and chicken breast. I took him for a few walks to clear his bowels etc he seemed better! Then his back legs seemed drunk, I picked him up and took him home. Through the course of the night his back legs become less and less responsive, I rang the emergency vet but got told to let him rest for 24 hours. The next morning he was dragging himself around the room with his front two paws, this was heart breaking. We took him back to the vets and they wanted to do X-rays on his spine, they found no damage do we suspect the infection made him paralysed. Letting a 3 year old AMAZING CARING baby be put to sleep was the hardest thing I’ve ever done but I know it’s what he would have wanted. He was my shadow my son my best friend and I would do anything to see him again and be rid of this pain. To anyone going through this too my respect and heart is with you, please keep smiling as our pets would hate to see us sad. This time last week I was cuddling my baby :( rest in peace Toby you were the best dog, bestest friend and company. Can’t wait to meet again and see your cute face light up. Lots of treats walkies tickles and kisses. Love you forever and ever xxxxxxxxxxxx

  191. today i have lost my best friend, Jaffa.

    he always was so happy to see either my partner or myself. my partner is a Trainee Vet Nurse and Jaffa was a stray brought into her surgery one day after being abandoned by his previous owner at his house, his owner just moved and left him.

    My partner took a picture of him on her phone from the vets to show me him and i fell in love with him right away, and told her to bring him home.

    when he got to our house he was a bit timid at first, wanting to beat any of the other cats or dogs we have that came near him, but he soon settled in and was good. we really dont know what age he was, first of all we were told he could be 6-8 years old, then it could be 12 or older.

    he had been with us about a year last week, but about 9 weeks ago we noticed a large groth beside his nose just below his left eye.. she took him with her to work one day and had a biopsy done as thats what was recommended. results came back inconclussive but strongly suggesting it was a cancerous tumor. at that point one of the vets suggested he might have about 2 weeks and then it would be time for him to leave us.

    but jaffa fought on as he was as tough as old boots, but about 2-3 weeks ago the groth just started to get bigger what seemed day by day until over the last 7-10 days he could hardly breathe through his left nostril. we decided that if he kept being as miserable as he was (he just always wanted to by himself if he wasnt having some food, and sometimes even if he was) we would do the humaine thing and have him out to sleep.

    well today was that unfortunate and sorry day, ive been crying on and off all day but finally poor jaffa left hus mum and dad at 7.00pm for a better life at rainbow bridge where he can play, run and have fun without any pain or suffering anymore.

    even tho we have other animals jaffa and i just seemed to form a very very strong bond together, a lot more than i have with some of the others.

    but as i said today my heart is heavy and i am very miserable and low but now at least we know Jaffa Cake (or mr cakeo) is finally pain and suffering free and hopefully is happy at rainbow bridge.

    i miss you my buddy xxxx

  192. To Pamela Chan, I feel your loss and understand your pain. I too just lost my sweet little Man of only 11 years to heart failure diagnosed Oct 2011. The journey we have taken to maintain some symblance of quality of life was long, hard and very expensive. The difference between the 2 cases sounds like your Buddy had left sided heart failure and my little man had right sided heart failure. I am a nurse who understands the problem with heart failure, it is terminal and the best you can hope for is to provide some comfort for a while but sadly the disease will win over. I too am still grieving, am angry and have a huge hole in my heart. I can’t stop crying, My brain and my heart are refusing to speak to one another. The truth of the matter is you didn’t do anything wrong. The vets knew the end was there but failed to be honest with you so you could understand what was happening. Please do not blame yourself. You did all you could, sadly the time had come for Buddy. Heart failure takes a toll on the body as a whole. Poor oxygen distribution, nutrution, the medications are hard on the kidneys, the list goes on. My little man actually died from renal failure due to the medications to controll the fluid and actually dehydrated him to the point it caused the renal failure. It is a fine line to tread and requires very close monitoring. Buddy’s left sided heart failure will affect his lung capacity more. The fluid fills to the point that breathing is severly compromised. Pamela, in a nut shell it is a very hard disease to treat. Even for humans. It is becoming one of the highest forms of heart diseases out there now. I’m hoping that writting this to you will help me too. But your case was so close to mine I wanted to let you know that you did everything right, HF is just a nasty disease and I hate to see you blame yourself. I hope you find solace and remember your baby in all the good ways, and beautiful times you have spent together.

  193. I lost my beloved dog Pinky yesturday. He appeared on my doorstep 10 months ago. It was a rainy nite and I opened my door to him. I had originally planned to just rescue him, nurse him back to health and find a good home. But after one nite I couldnt let him go. I thank God, the universe for putting him into my life and although his physical prescense has left a whole in my heart, I revel in the hundreds upon hundreds of wonderful memories he has left me. I love u then,now and forever my sweet prince.

  194. My dog SHADOW was great dog to me , because I grown up with him . He use to chase me to my friends home . A friend of mine is friend him too. We went through some rough patches in our lifes . On the other side we had awesome time to gather ( nothin can I this world can beat our joy ) . But , buddy SHADOW won the race today and left me behind , watching me from behind the finish line. I ll be with u dude , once I’m done with this distance between us . Where we ll be having a blast in our life every second , once I cross the finish line . Till then bang every dog in heaven & have blast ( my dog is so Randy just as me ).

  195. I lost my Snow to cancer and megaespogas.He was on chemo for 6 months and seemed to be gettung better but in two days he went down hill and had to be put yo sleep.I miss him so very much i just cry everyday

  196. Yesterday I lost my best friend of 11 years, Maya. I feel so devastated.I know she is in a better place, but I miss her so much, She was so kind and loyal. I will always keep her in my heart. Thank you for these wonderful years.

  197. My best friend (my Boston Terrier Dee Dee) of 11 years died in March of 2010. I still miss her everyday, somedays more than others. Sometimes I dream about her, and, although it is wonderful in the dream to hug her and play with her and talk to her, it is hard to wake up and realize that it was just a dream. When that happens I miss her so much I can’t sleep and cry all the time. It is such grief I don’t know how it will ever go away.

  198. my beautiful dog goldie was such a kind and gentle dog. she was so good with the grandchildren and other children as well. she was friendly and happy.
    we thought she had arthritis in her hind legs and took her to the vet where they told us she had cancerous leisions all over her hind legs. they told us they could amputate, but that was no gurantee that the cancer would not spread.
    so we had her put to sleep. both of my children were there when she died, and we were with her right to the end. we miss her so much,and we grieve every day. she died on april 25, 2012 at 5:00 pm.

  199. I lost my beloved dog in March due to an emergency bladder stone surgery where the stones were stuck in his urethra. He was at the vets for a week. I would go sit with him everyday after work just to comfort him while he was healing. He showed signs of recovering but still wouldn’t eat or drink. They thought it would be better if he came home cause then he might eat in familiar surroundings. I brought him home but after a couple of hours he started to get week and unresponsive. I was losing my baby…he was put into the vehicle to go back to the vets….but he didn’t make it. I know now that he just wanted to come home to pass peacefully. Even today I still cry over losing him….the house seems so empty without him. He’s not there with me anymore when we go anywhere in the vehicle… I feel so ost and miss him so terribly. We had a wonderful 12 years together and always in my heart.

  200. My beloved westie died last summer and I was devastated. She was only 8 and very healthy but my dad accidentally ran her over. I have only just begun to accept her death and trust me it is very hard. She was my best friend and she always knew when I was upset. She was truly a great dog and I can’t wait to be with her once it is time for me to go. She is very dearly missed:(

  201. my cute white rabbit,PINKY left me on this may7th.She was my everything,my naughty lil bubbly gal.I miss u a lott…Y u left me.God plz gimme her back.Otherwise take me to her.I want to see her again,to pat her,run around with her,to eat wid do all funny thingz.Love u lil sister..Come and comfort me.

  202. Hi Tracey D

    I read your story you wrote on 26 Feb 2012. I cried also upon reading towards the end. My heart goes out to you.. I have just lost my beloved poodle on the 22 Apr 2012. I am still coping with the guilt & grief. My story was posted on 3 May 2012. However, there is this website link below I find it’s very helpful which may help you to cope with your grief.

    Pamela Chan

  203. I lost my best friend Rush, a Silver Tabby, one year ago today.

    He was 18 years old and my heart is still broken. Yes, maybe too long to grieve but on this day I remember his life with me and my ex-wife(he lived 9 years more with me after we broke up)

    Nothing hurts quite so much as the loss of his nibbling on my nose in the morning, his talking to me, and his wonderful smell, and playing with him.

    I just miss him….he was a good friend, my best friend.


  204. my beloved cat ELLIE is 18 and a half and very thin,also totally deaf ,and I know how you feel as I lost my gorgeous boy to cancer 3 years ago aged 11 and I was absolutely devastated. I am dreading making the imminent decision for my cat now. She is so thin and sleeps most of the time. She is next to me now snoring away ,but she is getting wobbly on her back legs and twitching more and more facially. I cry as I write this especially as my husband says I shouldn’t have pets if it upsets me this much ,but I love them so much.

  205. Confused & intense grief over the unexpected & sudden death of my dog, a white x breed Poodle & Maltese named Bobby
    My dearly deeply loved toy poodle passed away 22 April 2012 Sunday so unexpectedly & suddenly due to heart failure. He was only 12 years & 8 months old. My husband & I were devastated over the loss of Bobby. His departure was too sudden & unexpected. Everything happened within 5 hours. We were not ready & prepared emotionally & mentally. My pain has never been as intense as those periods when my 2 pet dogs passed away many years ago.  Prior to the happening, he was still healthy, had been eating well, peeing & pooing well.
    On the Sunday morning, he was still alright.  Only in the afternoon, he started to show restlessness & breathlessness.  I brought him down to get some fresh air (which I would normally do & he would feel much better after the walk) but he refused to walk.  So I carried him & let him sit by the fountain so that he could breathe easily.  We sat there for about 15-20 mins, then we walked back home.  He still urinated on our way back home.  I brought him to the swimming pool recess area but he was too tired to walk but sat on the ground.  So I carried him & went back home instead.  In the lift, he was very weak & his neck kept turning to the left with little energy.  At that moment, I felt very worried & uneasy about his condition.  But he was better when we reached home & I placed him on the floor covered with the comforter.  He started to look for his daddy & even went into his favorite travel carrier when his daddy took it out getting ready to bring him to see the vet together.
    As our vet clinic of the branch (we always visited) didn’t open on Sunday, I had to bring him to the other branch which was located even further away from our home.  I remembered in the taxi he wanted to come out of the carrier, so I let him out.  As he came out, he barked a couple of times as if telling me he was feeling well.  I immediately hugged him & comforted him saying to him that we were reaching soon, just hanged on for a little while & you would be alright.
    Upon reaching the vet clinic, he was immediately put on the oxygen mask and was given 2 injections, one for Dexasone (steroid) & one for Fursemide (diuretic) to get his condition stabilized.  The vet told me his condition was very serious & may die any time in my hand on the journey when we transferred him to the pet hospital.  (I was shocked & confused & refused to believe because his condition was not so bad before he reached here).
    I couldn’t understand why his condition worsen so fast (To be frank, I don’t have much faith in vet. As that point, I felt that the vet who was also a senior one, did not do her best to treat my darling).  On the way to the pet hospital, my darling was still struggling to breathe (there was no oxygen mask), so I wind down the taxi window to allow more fresh air for him.  It took us at least 20 mins to reach there.  Upon reaching, he was immediately warded & placed on oxygen mask & injected with fursemide to treat his acute breathing difficulty.  The vet surgeon said that if his condition could be stabilized within the next 3 – 4 hours, he should be able to pull through.  We waited for 3 hours & forced my way to peep into the room where he was being monitored with all the life saving treatment devices.  During that hour, there was a change in shift in the staff nurse who, in my assessment, was not as gentle & careful as the earlier one.  It came to a time he was trying to change the oxygen devices & for the 1 – 2 mins, my darling oxygen mask was removed.  The staff nurse asked me to come in to monitor him while he went to the next room opposite to get the device. To my shocking, my darling tongue was turning very purplish & the next moment, went into coma.  I quickly shouted for help.  The vet surgeon & the staff nurse rush in to resuscitate him.  His heart beat came back for only 10 mins but he couldn’t make it.  He left us at about 9pm on Sunday 22 April 2012.
    I was very angry with the vets. I had entrusted my darling to them for rescue but it seemed like they had made things worst instead of saving him.  I blamed myself for making the a wrong decision to rush him to the vet (who had apparently had made situation worst instead). Before that, Bobby was still looking alright though I saw worrying & disturbing signs of Bobby having breathing difficulty. More than 2 years ago, he had had a similar situation but he managed to cope & pull through without seeing the vet. If only I had given him a chance to cope, relax & not putting stress on him (he wouldn’t have suffered the ordeal of travelling in the taxi & going through vet’s treatments which apparently made matter worst), he may have pulled through again.

    Back on 19 Sep 2011 he was diagnosed with heart failure & kidney problem. Since then, we changed his diet to home cooked food again for the sake of his health. He always looked forward to his dinners & breakfast.  He was placed on medication prescribed by my vet.  I fed him ¼ tablet heart tablet (fortekor) & ¼ tablet diuretic (lung water removal) for dinner & only ¼ tablet diuretic for breakfast.  He loved eating raw papaya (which actually had reduced his creatinine & BUN level) & helped in the healing of his skin problem.  Every evening, we would feed him apple.  He also loved eating bananas which we fed him occasionally.  His appetite improved a lot with each day passed.  He poohed at least 2 times a day & also pee well. Because of his heart failure problem due to malfunction of the mitral valves, he would have some coughings each time after drinking water, in between sleeps & when get excited. I would bring him for monthly check up to monitor his health condition.  His last checkup was on 23 Mar 2012 & the vet did not detect any deterioration of his overall health.  His next appointment was already fixed on the 7 May 2012.
    Our hearts are feeling intensely painful over the loss of our Bobby. I am still coping with the pain & loss.  I’m still feeling with guilt for sending him off so soon.  I was very confused & blamed myself for my inability to keep him longer.  Did I rob him of the chance to live longer?  If the clock can be turned back, will the outcome be different if I did not rush him to see the vet? 
    We had him only for 14 months when I took over from my parent after our family pet dog, a mongrel which we adopted, passed away. They have been each other companion at my parent place for the past 9 years.   Our family adopted him when he was 2 ½ years old. We deeply missed his companionship, the love & joy he had brought us during this period.  He is our fur family member with an interesting character which I could never forget.

  206. Laurie Pawlik-Kienlen

    To everyone who is suffering because of their pet’s death,

    I’ve read every comment and am so sorry that you lost your pets. I know how it feels, and I want you to know you’re not alone in your pain. Thank you for sharing – it really helps other readers who have lost their pets to death, and who have not shared.

    Thank you for sharing your stories here, and may you rest in the knowledge that your pets are in a better place…perhaps even waiting to greet you! After all, who knows what happens to our souls after we die?


  207. Laurie Pawlik-Kienlen

    Dear Karen,

    I’m so sorry to hear how your cat died. It sounds like a terrible ordeal, and the veterinarian didn’t seem to do anything to help. There’s nothing I can say to make you feel better, but I want you to know that my heart goes out to you. I would hate to go through that with my cat or my dog, and I hope that your heart heals.

    May your cat’s soul rest in peace, and may you one day remember her with love, peace, joy, and acceptance. She is in a better place — chasing bigger bugs than we have on earth, and annoying bigger dogs than she ever has before!

    Blessings and sympathy,

  208. my baby peanut of 12 years died in my arms ,she was 12 years old ,i held her for 2 hours while she was dying,she had just had surgery 2 days before ,for pyometra which i had never heard of ,while she was dying she was shaking and couldnt breath and the vet said there was nothing he could do,so i just held her at home,i cry alot everyday i just want her to come back to me,i cant handle this.

  209. Loseing our little girl Buddy was the most devestating things that I have ever been through in my life. We miss her more then words could possibly ever,ever express. She is/was Daddys heart. We love and miss you “our little cuppycake gumdrop.

  210. I had my 15 year old kitty put down yesterday. I feel so bad. Yesterday was Monday. 10 days prior she was fine. Absolutely fine. Chasing bugs. Annoying the dog. Laying next to me and purring. Then, on a Friday night, she had what looked like a seizure. Low yowling, laying in the floor with legs pulled up, mouth open, tongue curled, panting and drooling. We rushed her to the Emergency Vet. Who said she was “fine – absolutely fine, just one of those things. It happens to older cats”, but she wasn’t fine. Back at home she had less energy. Less strength. Tried hiding in dark places. Had problems standing and walking. I took her the next day to our vets. He said she looked fine and took blood tests. He said her heart sounded “a little off” but nothing serious. She’s old, after all. Maybe she had a little stroke. Two days later he said the test results suggested a problem with her pancreas and gave her meds. The next day she was worse – and not eating – so he said it might be a bad reaction to the meds and to try a day without them. She got WORSE. Poor kitty. So he said to bring her in and he would keep her a few days to give fluids and injectible meds. I took her Thursday AM. I picked her up Saturday. Her face looked VERY swollen, but I thot it was from the fluids. At home, I discovered she had severe ataxia. I had to hold her up to help her drink from a water dish. She tried to find me once by crawling to another room, I found her laying in a ball with legs all askew. HOW COULD THE VET NOT HAVE NOTICED THIS!! She was there for DAYS! But he had told me she would be FINE! I laid her on the floor on a towel with a plastic bag under it as she couldn’t move. She would pee and just lay there until I came to help. I would hold her in my lap and pet her – she would purr and lick my hand. But she was so swollen and unwell. I did what I thought was right. But I’m so VERY ANGRY that two VETS seemed to have failed me and my girl. I work in a hospital (tho not medical myself) and “I” knew something was wrong. “I” knew that she had edema as soon as I looked at her. “I” recognized ataxia. It’s like no vet really took the time to properly evaluate her and STILL charged me nearly $1000. I feel guilty I didn’t take her to another vet somewhere else that would have given more attention – and maybe saved her. I’m mad at these vets AND at myself for not saving my kitty. She was VERY annoying at times (one of those who was NOT good at using her litter box) but so sweet and such a cuddly girl. She would follow me everywhere. Sit by me. Sleep with me. Wait outside the bathroom door for me (if she couldnt push it open). We brought her home exactly 1 week before my son’s 3rd birthday. As a gift for him. But of course, she choose me as her person. And now, she dies one week before my son’s 18th birthday. It’s horrible. And the place I work – my boss – dont even get this . My boss never even said “sorry” to me. Just ignored it. My son, who is not much of an empath, misses her. I can tell by the wetness under her eyes yesterday and because when I got home, he had the doors to the room she lived recently all shut and closed. He said he didn’t want the dog in there. But he is not expressive and refuses to talk about her or how he feels. So I can’t really talk to him about it. I miss my kitty. I miss her so much. And I am ANGRY at the vets. My dog is 12, a lab mix, and likely to not be around a lot longer himself just due to age (pretty healthy for now, but so was my Sarah). Not sure how to survive this loss, much less another.

  211. Dear Lindsey Smith, I have just read your comment about your precious goldie, I feel for you so much as like you I also had to let my goldie “Connor” go 9 months ago. He was 7 weeks short of his 15th birthday, and it was one of the hardest things I have ever had to do in my life. he too like your girl was still eating well and loved his treats, and would also greet me with the smiley face that goldies have. The thing is Lindsey, only you and your parents can decide whether the time is right for your goldie,you know her better than anyone else. You have to ask yourself “Is she in pain”? Do you think she is having a good quality of life?.You said she has to take 2 pain killers every day, also, she is struggling to climb the stairs,do you think she is happy, you have to be strong and as ive said only you know when the time is right. You and I were very blessed to of had our goldies live for such a long time, you will have so many memories of all the happy times you both have had together. Lindsey you probably wont want to accept anything that I have said and that is understandable, all I would like to say to you is I wish you and your parents all the best, and love to you,be strong, Tina from Wales. xx

  212. @ Katrina

    That is the most beautiful poem I have ever read for a loss of a pet. I think of my golden and then think of this poem. Thank You

  213. Im so sorry for all of your loses, I had to have my 15 year old staffie put down last year and I still feel guilt some days. On friday I came down to let my 3 dogs out and one of them was dead in her bed. She was not ill or any different the day before. I feel shocked and guilty that I should of known something was wrong. I also have a staffie that has had mast cell tumours removed recently but now he has another 2 that are huge. He is whining for his lost friend and off of his food, Im so worried that his time is coming also to pass over. I dont know if I can cope with losing him so soon. I am still in shock over losing Belle on friday. My heart goes out to all of you that have lost your 4 legged friends xxx

  214. My “sweet little darling”, Felecia passed away on 4/13/12 in my arms as my vet, Dr.Kim Simons helped my 15 year old Persian cross over the Rainbow Bridge. Having the procedure performed in the peace and comfort of my condo was the best decision. Felecia was suffering from kidney failure and I could not allow her to suffer one second in her life. She had the perfect life and I wanted to give her the perfect ending. Felecia was black with yellow eyes, shared her food with a bird I had for two years, never hissed at anybody or anything. I had her body cremated and brought her home last week. Also the best thing, because I feel that she is still close to me. It did take a tremendous amount of courage to play God and end her life, but it was the final act of love that I could provide to my “baby”. She was a very small Persian, only 5 pounds even in her prime. I knew she was having trouble with her kidneys when she was peeing more than normal and drinking all the time. Could I have done more sooner? Perhaps but when a cat reaches that state their kidneys are already in bad shape. I am going to suggest this to all my animal loving friends…If you can afford to have your pet “put to sleep” at home, it is better for your pet and you…You can let out all your emotions, cry like a baby, I know the gentle and caring manner in which my vet helped me make the decision really did help me start the healing process much sooner. God Bless You All!

  215. To the lady who has regrets,my cat was put to sleep on Wednesday it wasn’t until today that I have accepted I made the right decision.
    I was making myself ill saying that I had killed her by asking for alternative tablets she went down hill really quickly.
    I hurt so much that I am taking kalms but every day is getting a bit better.
    I hope you come to terms with the situation soon.
    It helped today teaching children dancing listening to their stories of loosing their pets.Kind Regards.

  216. Put my 13 year old cat to sleep in early February.Miss her so much.She had been losing weight and wasn’t eating much.Vet said it was her thyroid condition which she was taking medication for.But when her weight kept dropping,she had a temp,and she had symptoms of being in pain she said they needed to do an x-ray and ultrasound.Totally shocked when it came back saying she had aggressive large cell lymphoma.They said it looked like the cancer was spreading.I did agree to let them operate to get the mass out of her intestines.I just wasn’t ready for her to be put to sleep.But she stopped eating completely after that and needed a feeding tube.Had diarrhea.I wasn’t sure if it was her cancer or the medicine causing this.I just didn’t think she could handle chemo and they said without it the cancer would keep spreading.Plus she hated going to the vet offive and would have to go a lot with chemo treatments.So-I made the painful decision to put her to sleep.I have felt guilty ever since.Now I think I should have given her more time.Maybe tried the chemo.I’m miserable and so sad.

  217. I let my cat get put to sleep today and I feel like a murderer. I came home to find him seizuring and laying in his own urine and rushed him to the vet. She said there were complications of diabetes and cancer spread throughout his body and his liver was basically gone. The vet said he was probably in pain and didn’t have more than a couple of weeks left. But while there he was eating and purring and I still put him down because I was too selfish to think of going through the anguish of bringing him back home knowing he was going to die and might keep seizuring.

    I am pregnant and my husband thought the stress of the whole ordeal would be too much on ME….. but now I know I am just a selfish b**tard who robbed my love of his time on earth and I will never, ever get over that.

    I could really use some help right now. Thanks.

  218. @LindseySmith

    Your dog sounded exactly like my late Gizmo. I mean if she is still able to walk and is responsive to you, i don’t think its her time. If she is struggling and failing to walk, crying in pain, then I’d suggest maybe its time to put her down. I felt exactly the same way, which is why i did not choose to put my baby down. Instead he spent his last moments in my arms and the last couple of his days at home. He was happy and still ate until the day before his death. I didn’t want to force death upon him, and i still felt like he had a chance to get better. I don’t want to sway your opinion but it does not sound like its her time. I wouldn’t take my decision back for the world. I am happy my baby died at home in my arms and not in a hospital room. But its your decision.

    I’m not a vet or any sort of animal doctor but i believe that it should be a family wide decision to put her down. I wish you the best of luck.
    And trust me it will never be easy, love.

    God Bless

  219. Hi there i am so so sorry my darling of your loss … there is nothing worse than the feeling of guilt. Please be assured that you beloved friend didnt want you there because she loved you so much she knew it would break your heart. She chose to go but she wasnt alone she took with her the very best memories of you with her. ..

    I lost my Tammie ( bishon ) this year my god I thought my heart actual broke it hurt so much. She was my Nanas dog and was ruined. I never thought my heart could break anymore after losing Nana 4 years ago, seemed Tammie was our only connection left and when she went it was awful. like you I was too late to say goodbye to her she died on her own in the vet and found this site to help get me through it. All I kept thinking of was oh my god how could I leave her to die on her own and why wasnt I there … again thinking that the vet could have done more but she was very poorly and have learnt to accept that she really didnt want me there as it would have been so hard.

    Please try not to think that you could have done more that what you did.. she knew you loved her so much and thats why she went.. hope this helps a little xxx xxxxx xxxx love and hugs x

  220. My beautiful cat Tilly 18yrs old was put to sleep yesterday I can’t stop crying I feel in pain.
    I feel guilty as she had a bad back but was sick on the tablets,so I asked for something different to help her.Tilly was given steroids, within a week she lost weight, stopped eating, meowing and purring,I blame myself.I wish I hadn’t asked for it.Everyone says it was a coincidence that she went down hill.I have another cat but Tilly was a tortoiseshell she was like a human the other one is half occie cat.
    Even though I love her I close my eyes and stroke her and wish it was Tilly.This is the 3rd cat I have lost the others were 16yrs old.
    This is the worse I have ever felt I loved her so much I think she knew I loved her and didn’t want to leave me.I don’t think I will ever get over it.

  221. My golden retriever is 14 years old. She has a little trouble walking because she has lost so much muscle in her body. She still eats a lot of food and drink a lot of water. She sleeps most of the day, which she has been doing for at least 5 years. She still gets a little excited when we some home. My parents think it is not fair for her to live with slight pain in her back legs. We give a her two painkillers a day. I never hear her cry out, but she has trouble going up our stairs. They have decided to put her to sleep in a few days. But, its hard for me to accept that the time is now rather than a month or two. When I see that happy smile on her face, when she comes to me to give her treats, i feel like I am about to kill a happy little child. What does everyone think?

  222. Oh i am so sorry for all your losses of your precious babies. I find this reassuring that i am not the only one who has lost my baby to unfortunate illness. I am sure all our babies are at peace now though. I was fortunate enough to have my baby take his last breath in my arms…I am still coping with his death, but since friday its been much better but the crying has not ceased.

    I wish you all a better day. I assure you that they are all waiting for us at rainbow bridge. It will never get easier and they’ll never be replaced but i know our dear babes are at peace..and we will join them again. God Bless <3

  223. Clairelady,

    Sorry for your loss. wish I could say the right thing to make you feel better, but only we all go through the pain. I am a better person now because I lost my dog. not just me but my husband has changed how he feels about dogs. you didnt betray her you did the right thing, taking her to the doctor. its never easy to rethink everything.

    Are you going to cremate her? we did for our dog, and she sits on our fireplace mantle with a burning candle and her dog collar.


  224. Hi Claire,

    I am so sorry to hear of your loss of Lady! Some of us have been through our own losses. None are the same but the guilt and the questions of “what ifs” we all have in common. Its easy to blame and second guess our choises of why we didn’t do this or why we did that.

    But, one person told me after I lost my Baby girl bootsie who I had for 12 years that we are only human and that we cannot forsee the future. WE are note fortune tellers. We are not God. Even Dr.’s don’t always have the right answers and sometimes think just a few hrs. won’t hurt but let me tell you this.

    You did everything you could for Lady! You loved her, you got her to the Dr. You put your trust in the Dr. like we ALL would. I did the same. My bootsie cat was my child, my baby to. I have no children myself and I pour my love and devotion and give all I can to my cats that I have had. Like you they are my life. Bootsie became sick throwing up one sat. afternoon at about 4pm. It continued and being it was unusual for her I called the vet at home at 8:30pm to tell him what was happening. She even had a loss of stool while just sitting beside her litter box. Thats why I called the veterinarian.

    She was weak, not eating, not drinking. I thought she got food poisoning from her breakfast that she at at 9am. That was the first thing she threw up and they it just turned to white liquid and some dry heaves. The dr. thought she possibly just had a bacterial problem inher stomach or bowels and I should keep an eye on her. She had not thrown up after that but maybe a few times. She was so weak, she went under my bed and once n a while would let out a cry. I was horrified as I knew she was hurting. He(vet) told me that if anything else came up to call him and he would meet me at the clinic(no 24 hr. clinic or hosp. for pets here). Sucks, we live in rural arkansas and I was so scared.

    Here is where I feel like you…I ask myself why did I not call him when she was crying out now and then as I’d run to caress her head, stroke her some and try and talk and comfort her. She suddently at 2:30am early sun. started what I thought was a seizure. She was half out from under my bed and gasping for air…I jumped down to my knees to tell her it would be ok and hollered for my husband to call the dr. He said I will be with boots, you call him. He said he could not imagine what was going on and I told him I could NOT watch her suffer like this…she was on her side swaying her legs like they do when they are dreaming but I knew at that point she was not going to make it.

    I even had a horrible thought that I wish I could have a needle to put her under peacefully right there but I couldn’t. I swaddled her in a blanket and held her close to me and walked her to the car and told her momma was with her and she was not alone and I would do all I could. I sat in the car in the dark as we drove 10 minutes to the rural clinic. I felt her twitch and then she was still and I knew she passed in my arms. I kept taking to her kissing her head telling her momma loved her and that it was ok for her to go to heaven where my mom was so she could be with grandma. I told Dan he didn’t need to rush and risk hitting a deer caus she was gone, he said no patti she isn’t. I said dan I know, a mother knows. Her front paws were crossed so beautifully and I just sat there for 10 minutes as we waited outside the clinic waiting for the dr. to get there…it was 3:10 am. and dan got out and met him and said I think she has passed away and I got out and said she is gone. He said come in and go into the room and I will look at her. I kissed her head and side and petter her tail(she never liked her tail being petted but I had to.) He listened to her heart, etc. and said I am sorry guys! He said I cna’t figure out why she would go this fast. She was always a very healthy active indoor cat. He said he thought her bowels were possible twisted. He took a stool sample and apoligized to do so so I turned my head.

    I could see her eyes glazed and I had to walk away. I didn not want any more horrifying visisions inmy head as I still after almost 2 mos. she passed on Feb. 26 of post traumatic visions of what I see as she lay there fighting to live. It is in myhead forever and I don’t think I will ever get rid of those visions. They get less but I go through WHY like you all the time. Others on this site have told me that I can keep asking why and I can work hard to get rid of those flashbacks I get but its not that easy. A lady told me she refused herself to let “one incident of the end of her beloved pets life to define the many many great memories.”

    When I heard that I realized that I HAVE to work at stopping my blame and I have to honor Bootsie with the happy memories even though I miss her and am brought to tears by the happy memories…..that, those memories of my tears when I remember them are sooooo much better than the horrible memories of those 10 hrs. she & I endured together. She would not want me to live with guilt, with flashbacks, she would want me to honor her with great stories and great memories and I am doing just that.

    You see, you have to think of something. What if you had your baby home with you and you watched her suffer like I did. I don’t know what is worse-watching her suffering or what you have to live with-constantly blaming yourself that she was alone w/out you. I get it, trust me I do. Maybe someone somewhere knew that if you had to watch the suffering first hand where you could ot get her to the vet you would have watched her gasping and thrashing for air and you would be having horrible flashbacks and guilt from that. I was told I called the vet.

    I was mad that I didn’t force him at 8:30 to meet me out there but after thinking about it…I think she would have been put in a cage, left alone on a late sat. night and into sun. and even if they would ahve put her on IV’s if it were a twisted bowel, she would have died alone. I don’t think your baby died alone. The vet and his employees were most likely there and she knew she wasn’t alone like my bootsie would have been. Our clinic is not staffed nights and weekends. I do feel good she passed in my arms, but what she went through before that I can never erase from my mind-NEVER. Our babies know we loved them, they know we did everything we could in our powers to help them and be there for them as much as we could. The would want us to forgive them.

    I had my bootsie cremated. My husband had to pick her up first. thing money to take her 30 miles north to be cremated. I picked her up 2 days later. She is with me. She did not like hte outdoors at all and she steered clear of doors to go outside, lol. So, I am keeping her in a beloved Pet Memorial box I bought on and it has 5 slots for pictures. I put her favorite toys(she loved rubber balls) I taught her to play fetch from 4 mos. on and she never stopped playing for 12 years. So, if you have not created a memorial please consider doing so because that would be a great process in your healing. You are not alone. Your baby is looking over you and with all the years of love and unconditional companionship she would want you to try and heal your heart hte best you can.

    It takes alot of time and I mean alot. I still cry uncontrollably at times and I have learned to let the tears out…they are healing tears. You have to know in the deepest part of you heart and soul that if ou could have prevented any of this you would have and you have to know your BABY-your child knew that and wants you to go on and be happy. It would not supprise me if your baby someone down the road sends another one your way to help heal your heart when you are ready.

    I truly believe this because bootsie healed my heart 12 years ago after the loss of my very first cat Tux. I told her God & Tux sent her to mommy to heal my heart and she would give me the eyes of recognizing what I was saying and they lay on my lap and just look at me with her loving eyes. She is part of my heart forever just as yours is. Talk to her as much as you can…that doesn’t mean you are crazy…it means you can do it because you know what LOVE is. Unconditional love!

    Take care and write anytime you feel you need to.

  225. My Trouble kitty (good-girl kitty, pretty kitty, adventure kitty, guard kitty) my best friend these past 16 years, died Friday morning.

    We found her at the foot of the stairs, she wouldn’t wake up. She was still warm, not normal, but not cold. She couldn’t have been gone for more than half an hour. I took her in my arms and cried harder than I ever have in my life. I cried harder and longer than for any of my grandparents that have died. I kept begging her to wake up, then started begging for myself to wake up, for it to be a nightmare..

    I put her in her favorite basket/bed and carried her out to the backyard and sat w/ her on my lap on a bench talking to her, petting her, trying to figure out what to do next. I kept looking around for where she may like to be put to rest, all her favorite spots were pavers or concrete. After a long while I saw a place next to a pot I’d been growing some cat greens in. From that spot, you can see everything she loved in the back yard. The tree she climbed when she was young, her catnip, an old piece of tree limb she’d scratch on, the spot she’d carry the the lizards she’d catch to play with, the benches she’d lie on or under, and through the window, the home office, and the “magic door” she could have me knock on and always have opened by the nearest family member, even if that was me, going back to the door we went out at and opening the “magic door”….

    I took her back inside, laid her bed down in-front of one of her favorite windows, and talked to the family about what I felt I wanted to do for her. I put some bamboo and catnip, fresh tissue, and all her favorite toys, in her bed with her, then went out to dig the hole. I put one of her other baskets upside down over the top of her basket/bed, then tied them together.. I left a long tail of string to gently lower her down. In the bottom of the hole, I laid a bed that she used to lie on when she first adopted us, when we kept a small pup-tent outside for her. I lowered her in, filed the hole, and collapsed crying.

    Since then I’ve found myself losing it… every-time I’d have fed her, every-time I’m in the kitchen and she’d have come running for a treat, every-time it would have been time to take her out for out-side time in the back yard…, every-time I walk to the bathroom I find myself looking for her in any of her favorite spots.. I hear tissue rustling but the bed isn’t even there .. I went back to my office today and saw some of her hair on my futon from when I decided she needed to remember that not every car ride was a trip to the vet..

    I keep trying to focus on all the good.. How she had been a stray, that she had picked us, adopted us.. That.. she had picked me. I knew that the day she showed off for me, climbing a tall evergreen tree against a neighbor’s house, leaping to their roof.. leaping on some unlucky chipmunk or mouse, then leaping back to the tree and climbing down the inside branches head first like a spiral staircase.. She came running to me, meowing every-other pace, did you see what I did did you see what I did… I keep trying to focus on all the adventures.. car rides to and from school, plane rides to FL before we moved down here… I keep trying to focus on how many times we’d saved her.. from the cold when she was a stray, from being euthanized when an a-hole picked her up on the walking path and took her in on my mom’s birthday, when she’d developed diabetes, and the change of diet that let her get into remission…

    But then I think of how that last day, with the heating/AC guys making noise I let her lay in a safe spot. I sat close by, I took her outside and let her wander, petted her, let her lie under the benches…I took the day off and spent it with her.. still I can’t help but regret not picking her up that evening, thinking, “she’s had an exciting day, let her relax of she wants to lay there”.. I keep thinking I should have scooped her up and carried her up to bed that night… or at least said and kissed her goodnight.. I should feel blessed that I got to spend that whole day with her, that I hadn’t wasted it at the office… I should feel blessed that she got to spend so many extra hours outside, with me, before she left.

    She never cried for any of us, she didn’t tell us like she usually would if she needed us. I can only hope and pray that that means she went peacefully in her sleep.. At the foot of the stairs, being the good guard kitty, the good protector, guarding her family and home between us and the front door.

    I’m crying as I type this.. I never knew I had so many tears inside me. I just miss her so much.

  226. My Dearest Friend Lady
    Posted April 23rd, 2012 at 11:45AM

    By: Clairelady
    Age: 31-35
    What’s Your Story?
    Share It Here
    My sweet dog Lady meant the world to me. She died on 14th April and I don’t know how I will cope with the grief. She seemed to be ill very suddenly breathing very fast on the Thursday night. I let her sleep a couple of hours and took her to the vet in the early hours of the morning. They said she had bronchitis and gave her injections and medication. If she didn’t improve we should take her back the next day. Which my mum did because I had to work. They gave her more meds and injections. Still no improvement. So on the Saturday 14th April we had to take her back again. To her death. The vet was meant to look after her and I left her with him and he had her there two hours and she was dead. My beloved girl I had for almost 11 years. She was like my child as I don’t have any children. I also have no partner. She had been with me through terrible times and I left her to die alone in a kennel. What did the vet do to her that day when I wasn’t there.

    I’m racked with guilt, why did I leave her, why didn’t I take her sooner. Why didn’t I watch her more closely. Why didn’t I spend more time with her. The list goes on. My heart is broken and I am becoming such a bitter person because I loved my girl and I was robbed of her at such a young age. Others live to be 16 some older. Why did she die?

    I was going to get an autopsy because I desperately want to know what happened but I decided no as I didn’t want her cut. But how do I know the vet didn’t neglect her or give her an O/D?

    Am so devastated I honestly don’t know how to go back to normal life. It feels like a betrayal, how will I laugh again now she’s gone.

    Am going to see her at the funeral home. Not sure it’s wise but because she died without me I have to see her and say goodbye. So sad I wasn’t with her when she died.

    RIP my dearest baby. Love you more than life itself.

    Sorry for the long post but I have so much I need to say.

  227. Today I awoke to find my Garage door open. My uncle who lives with us is a bit old and senile and tends to leave doors untended. I corrected him for it and moved on with my day.

    That is until I left my house and found my cat dead, hit by a car, on the side of the road.

    I am so consumed right now with anger and hate. I want to beat my uncle to death with an oar or a cricket bat.

    I raised that kitty from a baby, helped deliver him from his mum. Losing him has hurt so much I am confused and unsure how to cope.

    I really skipped denial and jumped right to anger, which I cannot seem to come off….

    *in tears and pain at the loss of her beloved Boddhisatva*

  228. Hi,
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  229. Well today i lost my baby. I woke up at 6am and found him breathing funny in the rocks. So i took him in my arms and sat in the yard. The day was so beautiful. I sang to him and sang to him until he passed away at 9am. Oh i cried and cried so much, i was in disbelief that my baby of 12 years was gone. But the suffering was over and i had closure holding him in my arms, there was a brief wind when he passed and i only knew.

    So i bathed him, drove him to the cremation center and know he is back home in forever peace. I can’t wait until we are reunited.

    I am just so happy i was able to be there with him when he took his last breath…He didn’t die alone. He was born loved and he died love and to me that’s all that matters.

  230. Just brought my 14 year old beagle/lab mix (Zena) in today to be put down. She had a number of issues and no matter how much I tell myself it had to be done I can’t help feeling a ton of guilt for doing it. It’s like I betrayed her trust or something.

    She was the absolute best dog you could ask for. Loyal and obedient to a fault. She went to work with me every day for years. When I went on road trips she went along. I couldn’t have loved her more and she couldn’t have brought our family more happiness.

    Our daughter will be hit especially hard when she finds out. She is 21 and was raised with Zena since she was 7.

    I feel like I’m in a state of shock. My wife called last night when I was out of town screaming and crying because she thought Zena was dying. She evidently had some kind of seizure. When I got home about 2:30 in the morning, she was sitting on the laundry room floor with Zena in her lap. Zena seemed fine then, but we both knew what had to be done. I slept on the couch with Zena next to me and in the morning took her to the vet.

    She was always afraid to go to the vet, but today it seemed like she knew what was happening. She was shaking uncontrollably, even though she was sitting in my lap the entire time. I’ve heard that dogs can sense death. Maybe that’s why she was always afraid to go there.

    She died in my lap very peacefully and I know she is no longer suffering. Someday my suffering will end also.

    Zena, you were an absolute gift and blessing to our family. You brought us immeasurable happiness and joy. We will miss you all the days of our lives. If I’m lucky enough to get to Heaven, I hope you’re there to greet me.

  231. I thought this was really nice. Funnily I read it the week before rolo was killed and shedded a tear at the thought of losing him. A week later and I am reading it for myself!

    I Remember
    I stood by your bed last night, I came to have a peep.
    I could see that you were crying. You found it hard to sleep.
    I whined to you softly as you brushed away a tear,
    “It’s me, I haven’t left you, I’m well, I’m fine, I’m here.”
    I was close to you at breakfast, I watched you pour the tea,
    You were thinking of the many times your hands reached down to me.
    I was with you at the shops today. Your arms were getting sore.
    I longed to take your parcels, I wish I could do more.
    I was with you at my grave today, You tend it with such care.
    I want to re-assure you, that I’m not lying there.
    I walked with you towards the house, as you fumbled for your key.
    I gently put my paw on you, I smiled and said “It’s me.”
    You looked so very tired, and sank into a chair.
    I tried so hard to let you know, that I was standing there.
    It’s possible for me to be so near you everyday.
    To say to you with certainty, “I never went away.”
    You sat there very quietly, then smiled, I think you knew…
    in the stillness of that evening, I was very close to you.
    The day is over… I smile and watch you yawning
    and say “Good-night, God bless, I’ll see you in the morning.”
    And when the time is right for you to cross the brief divide,
    I’ll rush across to greet you and we’ll stand, side by side.
    I have so many things to show you, there is so much for you to see.
    Be patient, live your journey out… then come home to be with me.

  232. So my teacup/min pin mix just turned 12…He’s been really sick and we are planning to put him down. I have been a wreck for the past week. I am just tired of seeing him suffer. Ive had him since he was born, and i just didnt think the time would come so quickly. I just don’t know how i am going to get over it…I am literally crying while i write this. Time is ticking. Oh my baby Gizmo. <3

  233. We put my 6 yr old boxer in kennels two days ago, but had a call last night to say she was at the vets having collapsed, Pancreatitis is the cause a very sudden onset although she had a weak heart and a few others things we drove 200 miles home last night picked up our other dog and were allowed to see our little girl she was wracked with pain, they hoped she would make it through the night which she did but was in too much pain, the vets advised (rightly) to let her go. She has been our rock these past few years and we are all totally devasted, we have another dog but it just not the same. The kennels are not to blame and reacted quickly but it pains us so much that we were not there. Last night I whistled and she picked her ears up, she knew we ahd come back for her I just wish we had never gone

  234. My dog rolo, we found him about 6 years ago he was a stray dog which nobody claimed so we ended up keeping him. I grew a very close bond with him. He was my wee baby. He loved the attention I gave him but loved to wander an sniff everything.. He got out a few times out of the house but we always got him back or he goin his way home. 5 days ago he got out again. I live close to a motor way which has a walk way bridge. The day after he had left. I got a phone call bak from the dog warden telling me that a dog had been knocked down and killed. She knew nothing about what breed the dog was. (he was a mixed breed jack Russell) when the council and warden went to get the dog it was gone. I was 99% sure it was my rolo. I was heart broken. But I kept phoning everywhere to find out where the body had gone. I managed to find the police man who went to the scene when it happened. I sent him a photo. That’s when he confirmed it was my rolo. I felt a little bit more closure but still won’t get his body back. It was a coach that knocked him down. The coach driver stopped and lifted him off the road.
    I don’t think I’ll ever be able to get over his death. He was my first pet that was mine. I was the one in charge of him and this has happened.
    I’m still waiting for him to come walking in. I don’t want to believe it has happened. I keep telling myself he is in his bed sleeping. We had such a perfect routine he knew so well each morning and night.
    I know nobody will read this but I feel that by telling my story it might help me accept it. I just don’t know what to do anymore. I just miss my baby so much I am so devastated :(

  235. I loss my little 2 yrs pup 2 days ago. I’m heartbroken, devastated; I miss her so much. She was put in sleep b/c of kidney failure. Part of me was gone with her. She died in my arms. I don’t know how to deal with this.she was part of my life and was part of my family. I used to be around by her, she gave me love and joys. The house is not the same without her. I miss her innocent face. The look of her eyes staring at me every day I got home after work. I coughed, she turned her head to me, I could read her eyes: are you alright,mom? I miss the ways the flatten her tummy on on the floor or just upside down so I could rub her belly. §he stayed in bed with me every night. Everywhere I go now missing her. Part of me was gone with her.

  236. My Ko’Olina girl was a brown, spotted, DSH cat. She went comatose at the ER two days ago, Friday morning at 6:30AM. I told the vet to stop her heart at 7:30AM. She had fluid in her chest from an infection. Probably a bite or scratch from our other cat playing too roughly. They are both indoor cats. Coal my boy kitty is meowing a lot now and more clingy. I think he is upset that she has not been here for two days. She was just 2 years old, he is 4 years old. I struggle with my decision to let her go, though I didn’t want her to be in pain or to try to revive her and she suffer and then still not make it. I miss her so much though. I wish I would have taken her to the vet at the moment her demeanor changed. She started sleeping more, but I didn’t schedule an appointment until she hadn’t eaten in a full day. I scheduled an appointment for the following afternoon.
    She died well before that appointment after we rushed her to the ER. I hope she knows I was with her, that my husband and I love her and we’re so sorry we didn’t realize she was so very sick and take her in sooner. Maybe she would have survived. It was just so weird since she was just fine the Sunday before, she was playing, lively and having a good time. I never imagined that within 5 days she would pass away and I would have to choose to let her go.

    This was such an awful lesson for us to learn at the sake of our favorite girl, I keep waiting for her to come around the corner in the hallway, come to get food with Coal and jump up on the bed to take a nap next to me. It’s so hard to accept that she is truly gone, even though I was there when she was taken off the ventilator and given the injection. I just wish I could know that she knew I was with her, she was vacant at the time. No responses at all and that killed me to see a shell of her like that.

  237. I had to make the heart wrenching decision to put my beloved border collie Mispickel to sleep on 7th Feb upon the vet’s advice. The vet said we were dealing with late stage cancer and it would be the kindest thing to do – however, I subsequently discovered that her symptoms were identical to post-treatment complications for the lungworm medication they had prescribed for her, which could have been managed with medication – my heart sank.

    I returned to the vet and requested her medical history. The receptionist disappeared into the consultation room and as she had been gone for some time and I heard whispering, I peered around the door and caught the young vet who put my dog to sleep rapidly scrolling through, highlighting, deleting and typing over things on the computer screen. When she saw me she looked embarrassed and said I would have to write in if I wanted a copy of her medical notes and they were their property.

    After a few phone calls they eventually printed off the records, however they have been changed so much that the description does not sound anything like how my dog was on the 7th Feb – it says she had “masses around her neck”, her breathing rate was 60 and she was struggling – her breathing was elevated but never that fast, she eagerly got into the car on her last ever car ride without any assistance and only had one small lump on her neck which had not grown in 11 months.

    The vets have also invoiced me for things I never requested and issued me with a 10% late payment fee if I did not settle my account within 7 days of the invoice – which would have been impossible as they posted it 5 days later, 2nd class just before a bank holiday weekend! I have no way of proving that the records have been changed as it will be my word against theirs. I wish I had gone for a second opinion – discovering that a mistake has probably been made and then covered up makes it unbearable. I don’t know how I’m ever going to get over what has happened.

  238. I also know how you’re feeling Kasi. I have been crying for the past 14 hours since I found out Milo died :( I miss him so much but remember our pets are waiting for us in heaven just like how they use to wait for us at home.

  239. This morning I just found out my 5 month old puppy (Milo), who I’ve only had for 3 months, died thursday morning at the vet hospital he was in. I kind of knew he died because it wasn’t until yesterday I noticed that I felt like a piece of me was gone.Plus, my mom heard the bell he always wore (even when he was in the hospital) jingling in the loft and down the hallway until it was gone. His way of saying “Bye mommy and grandma”. All I can remember was the good times me and my family had with him. He was such a cutie. I miss him soo much he brought joy and happiness to the house. I just wish I was there when they buried him because the only thing i remember of him in his final week was him looking at me like “don’t cry I’ll be okay”. That puppy fought for me until he couldn’t anymore and I appreciate him for it. R.I.P my sweet little boy. I’ll miss you laying on my shoulder and barking at me for not playing with you.

  240. Snuggly wasn’t the cat I thought I was looking for 5 years ago. I wanted a young long haired grey kitten. I had had three orange cats growing up but they lived good long lives but were no longer with us and for the past 6 years I had been in an apartment that didn’t allow cats. I was new at work and hadn’t told anyone that I was looking for a cat so it surprised me when a co-worked told me that she knew I was looking for a cat and had the perfect one for me. Later she told me she was just desperate to find someone to take this cat off her hands – she found her as a stray – very very skinny and declawed. She had put signs up all over the neighborhood and contacted local vets but no one seemed to be missing her. She brought me pictures – Snuggs is a calico/tortie mix and I wasn’t immediately attracted to her but my friend convinced me to drive to her house an hour away to see her in person. I got there and Snuggs was kind of quiet but crawled into my lap. It wasn’t love at first sight but I’ve never been good at saying no so ended up taking her home. Things didn’t go very well at first. Snuggs spent all of her days just sitting under the couch. She came out to eat when I wasn’t around but that was it. I don’t have any other animals and was going out of my way to make things quiet and safe for her to come out. After about a month she came out one day and was just the friendliest cat ever. I couldn’t believe the change until a few hours later when I realized that she was in heat. The vet my friend had initially taken her to said that she had already been spayed but he was obviously wrong. I took her to a new vet and arranged for surgery days later. They also guessed that she was around 4 years old. I got a phone call from the vet after surgery saying that she had a horrible infection in her uterus and was very very ill and may not make it. I still wasn’t very attached to this cat and couldn’t believe the thousands of dollars I was spending on a cat that I didn’t even really want to keep, but once she recovered and came home, she was a new cat. I think she hadn’t been feeling well from the infection from the time I brought her home. Once that was cleared up she just blossomed. We have been best friends for the past 5 years. She is the thing that I look forward to coming home to at the end of the day, the one I curl up with in bed at night, the one that pushes my bathroom door open every morning letting all the cold air in just so she can be ready for me to turn on a trickle of water in the sink that she likes to drink. She sometimes is more like a dog than a cat, running to greet me at the door each day or night when I get home. If I’m away for a few days she never holds it against me – just comes running to me when I do return and she has the louded little purr motor that just won’t stop. She was diagnosed with breast cancer a little over a year ago. The lump that was removed was way less than 2cm so her prognosis was kind of unknown – they said anywhere from 3 months to 3 years or more. She was fine for about 8 months. Then I felt the tumors come back. The vet said we could remove them again but that it wouldn’t prolong her life at all and she really really hated going to the vet and had a somewhat difficult recovery from the first surgery so we opted to just wait things out at home. The lump got bigger, a lot bigger – like the size of a golf ball but she didn’t seem to be in any pain and was just as active and loving as always – until a little over a week ago when she stopped eating. Then in the past 2-3 days she was more lethargic. Only wanting to sit on her special chair or on the bed and sleeping away most of the day. Her sleep didn’t seem totally restful – more like she was just staying still to try to minimize the discomfort. She mostly kept her eyes closed. After watching her for several hours Thursday night I decided the best thing would probably be to have the vet come put her to sleep the following morning but then around 9:30pm everything changed. She woke up, stretched, and went to the bathroom, jumping into the sink and looking around for me to turn the water on for her. Then she drank and drank and drank. When she was done she jumped down and then went back to the bedroom and waited for me. When I came in she snuggled up right next to me like she always does and the purred and purred. It was a great night and I thought maybe I was wrong about her being miserable earlier in the day. When she was looking bad I had managed to get someone to cover for me at work on Friday but after such a good night on Thursday I woke up Friday a little embarrassed that I was home and not at work. Her bounce back was short lived though. After about 12 hours we were back to her clearly not being comfortable. I debated waiting one more night to see if she would bounce back again but ultimately decided that because she had advanced cancer and really wasn’t going to get better that it was better not to make her be uncomfortable anymore. I had the vet come over last night and put her to sleep. It was the hardest thing ever! I’ve only ever put one other cat to sleep and that time it was so very obvious that the time was right. This time I really don’t know if I did it too soon, waited too long, or did it at the right time. I just don’t know. I do know that I miss her terribly. I hate to go to bed without her right there bedside me and to wake up without her sleeping at my feet. I miss the rush of cold air in the bathroom when I’m in the shower as she pushes the door open to get in and wait for me to get out. I miss having her beg for attention and pets in the morning before I leave for work, I miss looking up and seeing her waiting for me at the top of the stairs when I come home at night, I miss every little thing about her – she was the most loving and gentle and wonderful and beautiful friend that I ever could have imagined. She was the first cat that I ever had where it seemed like she really loved me as much as I loved her. Every minute of every day is so hard right now – I miss her soooooooo much!

  241. I lost my one year old puppy today due to Parvo. We noticed she stopped eating about three days ago. She was still drinking water, which I thought was a good thing because puppies with Parvo usually don’t drink any water and they get sicker. But, we couldn’t really afford a vet now, due to the economy. So we ordered Parvaid. We also looked up emergency tea for parvaid and we went and got pedialyte. She started drinking more water, but she started drooling something awful, and she just wasn’t the same energetic puppy anymore. We had to wake up every hour and give her medicine, so I did. I woke up at 5 and gave her, her medicine and by this time her eyes were wide, she was breathing heavy, and she couldn’t even look at me, I knew it was time to say goodbye because she was just suffering so bad. I said, “Baylee, Mommy knows your hurting, and I’m so sorry I can’t help. You have been such a trooper this last three days, and I want you to know it’s okay to go now. You can go play with God.” and I left the room, and went to sleep. I woke up at 6, and she was gone. I’m grieving so bad right now. I feel like I’ll never get over this..</3
    I love you sweet angel.
    It's not goodbye, it's I'll see you later.
    -Mommy loves you Baylee.

  242. Hi Callie, I would take Busta to the vet. You don’t want him to suffer and who knows, there might be a chance for him. If not, at least you know you have continued to take care of him, even if that means saying goodbye. I wish you luck. It is difficult to find out news and make decisions. I hope that you get good news and that your pet heals.

  243. I was heart broken to lose Howard back in February. I wrote about it on here and remember having a lot of guilt and sadness. It was rough. I loved him more than any other pet.

    I have gotten over his loss and I am enjoying the time I have with my dog and cat who are alive and well. The pain does go away. I promise. I see pictures of Howard and smile because I know he was happy and he made me very happy.

    Anyone who takes the time to visit this page must love their pets very much and these animals are very lucky to have you all as parents.

  244. My dog Busta has been with me all my life (12years) he is sick but i don’t really want to take him to the vet because i know we won’t bring him back alive. What should i do

  245. Thinking of you all today. Reading all of your posts helped me. You are right that having a pet is so important in our lives. Mine, since I was a child–Midnight, Danny and now Smokey have made me a better person. And yes, our pets know us so well. Sorry for these latest losses. I’ve had birds growing up in my house Becky–and they are such characters too and are great pets. Of course you would miss yours. I have also been thinking about them.

    I am definitely adopting some pets in the future, but right now I want to just think and change some things. Everyone handles that differently I think. I do hate being home though, and I am off from work–Yesterday I moved the loveseat which used to be in front of the window in the sun. Smokey always stayed on it in the morning. I feel a lot better not staring at it. I did keep some of his things. There is a blanket which still smells like him and I’ve kept some of his toys. What I find most difficult is looking at the empty spots where he stayed. I like to think he is with me as well. That was interesting about Felix and the gust of wind. I can tell that the thought of him being near you and saying goodbye brought some comfort, Papermoon. I had an experience when I can home after my cat died at the vet and I screamed his name. There was a huge bang on the roof exactly after I yelled. It sounds crazy, but it stopped me from sobbing. When you think about it, no one really knows about the afterlife.
    I’m feeling less crazed, thinking more about how much he added to my life and how grateful I was to have adopted him, or maybe that he adopted me.

  246. My beloved feline companion Felix,14years old, passed away last night. I took him to two vets, and they both said they didn’t really know what was wrong, but gave him 2-3months to live. He seemed to be improving on Sunday! His appetite sort of returned, he was very loving, and just wanted to be around my bf and I. But when I took him to a new vet on Monday, he lost movement of his left leg and was complaining non stop when he was brought home. That night, I positioned him between my legs, and I don’t know if he was sleepy or actually comfortable, but he slept there a good while. That day before work,my cat just looked miserable, and didn’t even have enough strength to I told my cat I loved him and my memory is foggy but I do believe I to take himself to the bathroom. I cleaned him and tried to console him, saying that I would take his pain away soon so don’t worry, and I apologized to him over and over again that he was in pain. I also took his bell collar and attached it to my bag because something just told me to carry a piece of him to work with me.On my way to work I would randomly start crying, not because I knew he had a couple of hours to live, but I was struggling with taking him to the vet tomorrow to euthanize him. On my way home, I just kept thinking that our last night together would be miserable for him, in fact..I had mix emotions for wanting to be home with my baby, but not wanting to be home. As I was walking home, for some reason I imagined my cat walking beside me..and when I was a good 5mins from my apt, I felt a gust of wind come at me. It was weird since that day was not windy at all, and that gust of wind just felt different, alil familiar, but different. I knew when I got home..I knew something bad was going to be awaiting for me..and I wasn’t going to like it. As I made my way up the stairs, I smelled incense burning, and my bf was at the door to greet me. I asked him if Felix was dead, and he opened up our door room to show me my cat curled up in the towel I left him in with flowers and the my t-shirt that I let him lay on.
    I cried…I screamed…I kept apologizing to my cat saying I was sorry he died without me. My bf also told me when he got home from work, it sounded like my cat called my name,I heard him do that before so I believed him, but my cat died with my bf who he also loved so I do feel some comfort with that. I also believe that gust of wind was my cat telling me goodbye.

    Its amazing how one can get so attached to a dog,a cat, etc knowing that we will 95% of the time out live them. That was the last thing on my mind when I saw my Felix for the first time and picked him out from the litter. I’am still coping, watching videos of us together and remembering the fun we got into is making me cry non-stop, but if I had to do it all over again..I would. I know I’ll get another cat in the future, not to replace Felix, but because he taught me just how special having a bond like this is. Cats/dogs/etc are truly the the best non-human friend one can have in life. I love my Felix, and I know if there’s an after life, that he’s waiting for me, just like he would always wait for me to come home from school/work/vacations…cause that’s how much we loved one another.

  247. i had a dog since it was a little puppy but it grow quite quickly and my landlord said i had to move or get rid of the dog, he was a russian wolfhound which i paid 450 pound back in 2002 for pure breed, i left him with my parents house and visted him when i could and on this easter just past he died, i wernt there for him and blame myself for his death, he was such a lovely companion i wish i could have been there for him and it hurts me to think of him not being here anymore. :(

  248. I am sorry for everyone’s loss. I too just had to put down my cat who was 20 years old. Granted she lived a long life but that doesn’t make it any easier. I got her when I was just 5 years old and she’s always been apart of my life, my security blanket, my connection to who I am. Putting her down is one of the most painful things but her time was coming whether I liked it or not. :(

    I think crying it out and thinking about all the great times you shared is really the best cure. You’ll never forget your pets and you’ll always miss them but I like to think that there presence made me part of the person I am today, so in a way, they always move on.

    I am going to donate my unused food from her and a small monetary donation to our local animal shelter in her honor. At least that way through her death and spirit another pet can be saved to grace someone else’s life.


  249. I didn’t lose a dog or cat but my grief is still the same. I lost my sweet little bird lenard and am having the hardest time dealing with it. So sorry to anyone who has lost a pet that they loved.

  250. I had to put my 6/7 year old cat Wills down on Tuesday. I got the call during lunch at work that they could not pass a catheter to help him with FLUTD. I had hoped all morning that this was just a hiccup and that in no time he would be back to normal. He was the best cat. He loved everyone and everything and even in his most pain he was bumping heads with everyone he met. I couldn’t afford the surgery and I couldn’t bear to put him through more pain for something that was going to impact his quality of life like that surgery would especially with the prognosis as poor as it was. I looked for him this morning out of habit and it was heartbreaking that he wasn’t there. The dog hasn’t been the same since and he is buried in the back yard. We have a new kitty today and she’s great in her own way but she’s not him (I didn’t expect her to be).

    I had to put my dog to sleep after about 10 years 2 years ago after he had a stroke that severely disabled him. I had to make the choice the night I got back from vacation and in a split second. Soon after I got a new puppy who is a great dog. He had lived many hard years with a seizure disorder and I know at the end he was frustrated by his own aging. I still look at his pictures and miss him.

    I looked at my pictures from when I moved into my house and had a little sad moment today. I have a picture of my Wills and my old dog and my other cat (who is still alive). Almost all my original pets from this era in my life are not here anymore.

  251. Jackie March 19, 2012 at 1:12 pm: I’m so sorry for your loss. The same situation happend with me last night, except right infront of my family. The ages of the two are identical and I don’t know what to do with my pitbul. everytime I see her I can’t help but feel mad/sad, but I don’t know whats the best way to deal with this. How did you deal with your 3 year old pitmix after the situation?

  252. Hi Everyone,

    My husband and I had to put down our cat (13 years) at the vet on March 17th. He had an inoperable tumor which was strangling his intestines. The vet said it had wrapped around and it could not be separated. This all happened very quickly–He was functioning regularly and then suddenly, two weeks prior, he began hiding in the basement, but coming upstairs for meals. At first we thought he was hunting a mouse; then I realized he wasn’t greeting us at the door when we arrived home. I am so devastated by this. I cry every day. He was one of my “closest friends,” and he grew up with our son. it is a chore to do housework now. He slept nearby or watched me. I used to tell him jokingly, “Oh you want to know how to do this.” I don’t want to get another cat right away although people have suggested it. I’m feeling angry–It was all too quick and I wished somehow I would have known that a tumor was growing inside him. Sometimes I wonder why I am carrying on like this. Does anyone have any suggestions about what I can do? I’ve looked at photos, to make a scrap book but it only makes me sob. He had soft black fur that sparkled in the light. I am thinking about running or doing yoga. Right now I’m feeling tired. I want to offer my condolences to all of you who have also lost a pet. We’ll get through this somehow.

  253. On April 3 rd at 4:48 our 6 year old Pitbull/bestfriend crook past away.. after multiple trips to the vet we discovered he has a heart murmur and still to this day still don’t know what made him so sick that he stopped sting from one day to another and had a seizure and passed away we went to two vets offices when he first got sick and none could tell us what was wrong with him we gave him medicine and did everything we were advised to do, blood work , iv’s and everything else u can think of and we still lost him and don’t even know why. My family is devestated my husband and my daughter can’t eat sleep or barely talk without crying, our Boston terrier misses him as well all she does Is whine and cry by crooks side of the sofa, I feel like if I lost one of my children and my heart hurts, we sent him to be cremated so we can keep him here at home where he belongs I just don’t know how to fix myself let alone my heartbroken 9 year old daughter or husband. . We never thought this would happen this was so unexpected just last week he was perfectly fine. I’m so angry .. so hurt I don’t know what to do.

  254. Monday April 2nd, 2012 I lost my best friend Sovie. She would have been 13 on the 15th of this month. She was a German Shepard/Austrilian Shepard mix. I could never have imagined my life without her. She is/was my bestfriend. I sit here with a heavy heart and tears running down my cheek. She died in my arms Monday morning after having what we believe 2 seizures. My daily routine worked around her and now it is void time i do not know how to fill it. I wake up thinking i hear her nails beside my bed in the morning and I look over and she is not there. She never let me down, never ignored me, never disappointed me. I know i gave her the same respect and hope i never let her down. I miss her waiting for me everyday seeing her always changed my mood because no matter what mood i was in she always wagged her tail. This household has had a great many of struggles over the past 13 yrs and no matter what sovie and i were a team. when i was home sick she was aways beside me when i cooked watched tv sat outside sovie was always there. I am not dealing with this very well and have never expereinced a loss of a pet and only 1 loss of a family member about 14 yrs ago. Sovie I miss and love you sooooo very much. I hope wherever you are you are running with your mom and having a great time. Love you forever and always love your best friend. I will see you again someday.

  255. Today i lost my 12yr old cat monica and i am absolutly deversated and it was one of the most awful things i have ever been through, i have 2 cats they were mother n daughter and the daughter had to be put to sleep today and i dont know how im going to cope without her because she was my baby and i was her mummy and she slept with me and everything and im just so sad and crying all the time and i miss her soooooooooo much im devestated :( :( :(

  256. I have just had my twenty year old cat put to sleep. I know she is at peace now and no longer in pain, but I miss her so much. The house is so quiet. She was our family and had shared so much with us. My mum is away and the hardest part is dealing with it all on my own. The tabby cat had seen me move out and get married recently but I would always return and visit my family home and give her lots of love and attention. I remember picking her as a only a kitten when I was 8 and giving her her silly name (Tabby Girl). It seems right but difficult that I should be the one to take away her pain. I had to be strong even though it’s hard. I love you and will never forget you. You helped me through my hard times too, comforted me and always made me feel better. Thank you. I hope you sleep peacefully now…

  257. Hi, I wanted to comment as I am feeling extremely lost at the moment. We lost our beautiful border collie only yesterday and am finding it extremely hard to deal with. He died suddenly with no real explantation as to why. We took him and our Newfie out for a wlk where he fell over we rushed to him and he started to pine (he never cried or made a peep) my hubby swooped him up and he passed out in his arms (stopped breathing) I screamed at him to come back to me and don’t u dare leave and he suddenly came back to us. Sadly on our journey home so could call the vet he went to go inside the house but he collapsed on our porch where we performed CPR but he didn’t come back to us. The vet said he was gone and she thought he had a tuma rupture. We had him privately cremated and he is back home with us once more. If he wished to die at home then we felt he deserved to come and stay at home with us instead of scattering. I just want some advice please how I can cope with this. He was my baby and we were extremely close. He was only 4. It has only been 31 hrs since we lost him. Thank u in advance :-)

    1. Kerri…I am so sorry for your loss. I know what you are going through. I lost my baby boy, Bailey, in June 2010 in a similar way. We were outside and he just fell over. I thought he was having a heat stroke but the next morning when we took him to the vet they ran tests and couldn’t find a heartbeat even though he was awake and alert. They told us a tumor had ruptured by his heart and his organs were failing. We took him home to spend a few more hours with him and so he could see Sadey one last time. They were our “golden” babies. Bailey was 12 when we had to put him down unexpectedly and this past December I had to make that dreaded decision to have Sadey put to sleep. She would have turned 15 last month. I am lost without either one of them here w with me. I really feel as if I have lost my whole world. A website has really helped me out, it is There is a pet loss forum on this website and you can go there to read others stories or share your own feelings….everyone on there is experiencing or has been through a similar loss. It is a very comforting site and has truly saved me and helped me get through each day.
      My heart goes out to you….

  258. We had to make the heartbreaking decision to put our 18year old cat Miffy to sleep this week. She was taken to the vet today, her body was giving out on her… she had been declining for months and this past week she had started getting worse and worse. Looking into her eyes you could tell she was miserable and in pain.
    The vet agree’d that tho they could prolong her life, there was no way to tell how long for, that the tests would cause her more pain and suffering and that even if she did live weeks more, there would be little quality of life. At the time it felt like the right decision, but now part of me can’t help but wonder…did we do the right thing?
    She was never the jump up on your lap and cuddle type of cat, she was often scared of everything..but she loved us, she would always be happy whenever someone would sit beside her and pat her.
    Right now i’m trying to move pass the guilt, everyone else is certain we did the right thing but i guess my grief for her loss is making it hard for me. I’ve had her in my life for so long that i don’t know what to do now shes gone, ever since I was 5 years old.
    Our other cat keeps wandering around the house, looking in all her hiding spots and trying to find her. It’s heart breaking to watch him and know that he will never understand :(
    But i hope wherever she is that she understands that we made this decision because we loved her so much, because we couldn’t stand to see her suffer so much. I love her, and no one could ever replace her :'(

  259. I just put my dog in the ground today. He was a Boudreaux pit by the name of winchester. I miss.him already. He was my first pup that I could call mine. He was very loving and would lick u to death instead of being aggressive like the rep. that pitbulls get. He was my pal and I love him and miss him and he won’t be forgotten. He had a favorite color. Red. He had a red everything. He was my best friend when I.didn’t have any. I love ya boy. See ya in when its time. R.I.P. Winchester

  260. I had to put my 11yr 8mnth old white GSD to sleep on 31/03/12. he was diagnosed with a liver tumor on weds 21/03/12 and went down hill very quickly. I was so shocked on how quick it was. I miss him sooooo much, and it hurts!! the house is soo quiet now and i keep thinking i can hear him. I keep breaking down in tears, i passed the vets this morning and broke down. If i see any pictures of him i break down. I sleep with his lead and favorite ball. I will always love him and he will never ever be forgottern. How do i cope with this???? I feel so empty, like ive lost a piece of me.. How do i make this pain go away?? RIP my baby boy Zimba xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

    1. I am so sorry for your loss. I know how heartbreaking this is for you and I share your pain and sadness. I made that dreaded decision this past December 12th and decided to put my baby girl to sleep. She would have turned 15 this past March 16th. I still miss her so much and have days where I break down sobbing like a baby. I sleep with her blanket every night. She was such a huge part of my life and 14 1/2+ years is a long time to share together.
      You should check out This website has a pet loss forum and it has literally saved me during these most difficult, painful, and sad days.
      My heart goes out to you….

  261. We had to put our beloved beagle to sleep today. This has got to be the hardest things we have ever done. My heart is still breaking. On our last visit to the vets he said Bear had been through enough that it was time for him to be at peace. I knew this day was coming I guess I just wanted someone else to say it. So today was the day I said goodbye to my sweetie pie. He was my companion for the last 6yrs. We adopted him when he was 3 yrs old. The beginning of his life didn’t start out too good. He was abused but when we found him at the shelter and adopted him his life started over that day. We always promised him we would love him and take care of him forever, and we DID. Right up to being with him when he took his last breath. Now as I sit here at home and it’s night time I worry where is he…and I want him back. I want to hear him coming down the hall and see his sweet loving face when he comes to me for some lovin. I want him BACK!! I pray I can get through this grief. God bless everyone.

  262. We adopted an eight year old Newfoundland just over a year ago. He was a lovely, friendly dog and loved people. We soon discovered he didn’t like to be taken by the collar if in trouble and snapped at me, our son and our neighbour. He didn’t give any warning or show remorse for this, which didn’t endear us to him.
    Last Saturday when I was trying to get him to go back to the house he went for me and gave my hand a nasty bite. Everyone, including the vet said I must have him put down. We took him for two lovely last walks. I wanted to give him another chance but my family all said no because we will never know when he may bite someone again.
    We took him to the vet and he was excited and pleased to meet someone new, little knowing he would never come out.
    Now I feel totally miserable and so depressed, I am surprised at the extent of my guilt and depression. He was 9 yers and 3 months, which is quite elderly for a Newfoundland but was healthy and I had him killed and I am feeling so miserable about that.

  263. My beautiful little boy had died 2 days ago, only that I found out yesterday. Maeko, my cat, was killed by a snake. He was my baby, and I miss him so badly. He was a Siamese cat, only 1 year and 4 months old. I am in so much pain. He’d picked his main owner which was me. He followed me everywhere and cried for me when I was gone. Wherever I sat, he’d always be on my lap. I miss your cuddles and your voice my baby, I miss you.

  264. My friend of 15 years, Toffie, was put to sleep today. Having had her since I was 10 she has been with me throughout some of the most important times of my life so far. Fortunately, Toffie was a grand old age for a Cocker Spaniel. However, her health had deteriorated so rapidly that the decision to say goodbye today was sudden and unexpected. I am devastated, despite being her least favourite family member and sometimes nemesis, ha! She was full of character and personality – a comedian and an adventurer. I feel almost like the degree of sadness I am feeling at her loss is irrational in some way, but she truly was a member of the family. I think I am in denial somewhat, I am terrified of temporarily forgetting in the morning and experiencing that awful wave of devastating realisation. I miss her terribly already. I think I must have expected her to live forever. Losing something you love is awful. She has broken my heart.

  265. Macy: I know it is hard even thinking of your pet not being with you. My dog was 15 in his last year and as he slowed down I knew it was only a matter of time before he would not be there. I would wake up and immediately look to see if he was still breathing. I often cried and talked to him just thinking of the loss. When I would get like that I would sit next to him and pick up a book I was reading and would read aloud. My voice seemed to comfort him and helped me to focus. It was almost like reading to a child, the child so interested and me really engaged in the moment. Enjoy the time with your pet and talk to them. They are your best listener and friend.
    After my dog was gone, I would hear a creak in the floor and think it was him for a moment. Looking around the corner and not seeing him in his spot, it takes time is what everyone says. Don’t deny your feeling and reach out for people who are receptive to understanding your loss. Sherry


  267. hello my name is Macy and I know this isn’t really helping writing about my dog that hasn’t even been put down yet, but we are getting him put down next Wednesday and all I can think about is what’s going to happen when he’s gone I cant stop crying and thinking about what I’m going to do also when he’s gone. Because all of the things I expect to hear like his nails making a sound on the floor or him snoring as he sleeps at night or him sneaking into my bedroom on sunny days and laying in the patch of sun on the floor or him barking at the garden door whenever he sees a fox or cat run across the garden! I want to know how everyone manages to cope because even though my pet has not yet been made to rest, It already feels like he has.

  268. Our beloved girl Celt had to be put to sleep yesterday following pyometra. We did everything we could for her (running up Vet bills in the thousands) but she developed septicemia, toxaemia, peritonitus and kidney failure. Even with all of these I prayed that a miracle would occur. My heart is breaking. I adored her and the house feels empty and cold without my beautiful best friend…:0(

  269. Our Miniature Schnauzer, April was killed on March 15, 2012, she was 12 years old she was killed by our other dog Roxy, whom was 3, she was part pit and Lab, they were best friends… so I thought… I came home from work to pick her up and take her to the groomers, which she loved! I came home to the back yard and found her mauled by Roxy. I was in disbelief! I have been crying non stop. I was so used to getting up in the middle of the night to put her to go potty so I was used to getting up when I heard her little nails hitting the laminate floor. I miss her terribly and feel so hurt. I pray that she didn’t suffer and died cold and alone, I hope it was instantly because she didn’t deserve to die like that. She was part of our family my twins are 12 and she was 12, she was with them there whole life. I feel alone and we can’t wait to see her again.

  270. We had to put our beloved chihuahua to sleep yesterday. He was 8.5. His name was cracker. I am sooo sad., he was my best friend :(. I am in a stage of shock. I just can’t believe he is gone. I knew it was the right thing to do but I feel guilty because that dog loved me so much and I feel like I let him down. I love you my sweet baby cracker. Have fun in heaven.